I've Decided to Grow a Beard
Disclaimer; I own nothing.
Waning: Slash. I guess? And craziness. Sweet, sweet craziness.
"Remus," Sirius said. "I've decided to grow a beard like Dumbledore."
Remus Lupin-Black, Sirius' husband of seven years, sighed. "Fine," he said. After nearly fifteen years of knowing the man, Remus was used to Padfoot's silly ideas. "I'll buy you a year's supply of candy if you do it. If not, you're buying me a year's supply of chocolate," Even though these men were just that, men, they couldn't survive without their treats.
"I accept this wager," Sirius said seriously. He got up to leave for work, but before he got to the door, Remus had something to add to the bet.
"I'm not having sex with you if you have a beard. If you try to masturbate you needs away, I will hex your balls off. Have a good time at work, darling," he said, sipping his tea calmly. Sirius' face lost all colour, but he said nothing.
Two weeks latter…
Sirius and Remus were watching TV in their living room. That is, Remus was watching TV. Sirius was twitching uncomfortably, trying very hard not to think sexy thoughts. 'Come on, Sirius, you can do this. After all, it's just sex. Sweaty, sexy, delicious, Remus-filled sex.' He whimpered slightly and twitched a little more. "Ah, screw it!" he swore, and spelled his facial hair off, lunging towards his smirking husband.
AN: I think of Sirius as a crazy horndog that can't survive a day without sex. Two weeks without it was like a lifetime to him. So. Did you like? Review. Or you get no cookies!
