Mary Carlisle looked out her window, trying yet failing to stop a single tear run down her pale cheek. Before her lay a small infant, the love child that she had conceived whilst having an affair with Matthew. When Richard had found out, he had banished her from their London home and sent her to a remote country home he owned that was far away from society. Here, under his orders, she was to go through her pregnancy, give birth to the child and give him to Matthew and his new wife Lavinia to raise as their own. Naturally, Mary was devastated at her husband's decision but had to go along with it as it was her husband's wish. The story that London would hear was that she had gone to visit family in America for the year and therefore leave the Londoners unsuspecting to her whereabouts.

Anna walked in and looked at her mistress and her heart really felt for Mary. Richard made it well known that did not want children and when Lady Mary did in fact have a child of her own, she had to give it up to the man she loved and the woman she wished she could be.

'Lady Mary, Mr and Mrs Crawley will be here soon for the child,' she said softly and Mary's eyes darted to her maid, whilst her body remained still. Blinking away more tears, she picked up her son and cradled her to her chest, kissing his small head. 'Have you thought of a name yet my Lady?' Anna added and Mary shook her head.

'I'm afraid to name him Anna,' Mary paused and looked at Anna, 'I'm afraid that if I do, I'll never be able to let him go. Oh Anna, I'm going to have to watch him grow up and call Lavinia mother, how will I ever do it?' Mary sobbed, her voice cracking midsentence and Anna put a hand on her mistress's shoulder.

'You are strong lady Mary and if Mr Crawley loves you as much as I know he does, he will tell the boy the truth as soon as he is old enough to know.'

'You think?' Mary asked hopefully, her brown eyes full of hope and Anna nodded.

'Of course my Lady,' Anna smiled before exiting the room, leaving Mary alone with her son.

'You are strong, you are important, and you are my son. My blood runs through your veins my love, my darling, my boy and that is blood well spent,' she whispered to the child, kissing his forehead. Mary cradled her child for about half an hour before Anna re-entered the room.

'It's time my Lady,' she said softly and Mary felt a sudden maternal instinct kick in.

'No, I shan't give him up,' Mary cried, holding her son tighter but Anna walked closer.

'You must Lady Mary, your life will be ruined if you do not, the family honour will dissipate, you will be alone,' she said and Mary nodded, knowing her maid was right.

'I want to be there.' Was all Mary said before she walked with the child towards a dark, large and ominous looking carriage that took her and Anna to a river side. When Mary stepped out of the carriage, Anna handed her the baby and Mary took look one last adoring look at her son before walking towards two figures standing in the distance. She could make out their faces as she walked slowly towards them, her simple white dress billowing in the wind. The icy wind bit into her gaunt face and she pulled the child closer to her breast as she came face to face with Matthew and Lavinia.

Matthew looked at his former lover with a look of pain. He hated to take their son away from Mary, especially as he still harboured his strong feelings of love for her, but he would rather save her and their son's reputations than condemn her to a life of solitude. Lavinia also looked sadly at the broken woman in front of her.

'Lady Mary, I am so sorry this has to happen,' she said and Mary nodded.

'I know, but it's better for my son.' Mary whispered and she kissed her sons head and her grip tightened when Lavinia began to take the boy away from her. Mary's face crumpled and Anna rushed out to her to stop her from collapsing from heart ache, even Matthew had to turn away. As soon as the boy was in Lavinia's arms, he began to cry uncontrollably and it pained Mary to listen to it.

'Let me hold him once more Lavinia, please,' Mary whispered and Lavinia looked back towards Matthew, who glanced his watch and shook his head, 'please,' Mary added, her voice pleading. Defying her husband, Lavinia handed the child back to Mary and as soon as she had, the baby stopped crying. Mary walked towards the stream that was just next to the group, followed closely by Matthew and Lavinia. Mary kissed her baby's head and the baby gurgled happily and tears filled her eyes as she began to sing softly to her son and rock him gently.

'Hush now, my baby,

Be still love, don't cry,

Sleep as you're rocked by the stream,

Sleep and remember my last lullaby,

So I'll be with you when you dream,' Mary sang softly and Lavinia placed a hand on her heart, watching the heart wrenching scene in front of her. Mary smiled sadly as her baby fell asleep in her arms and she turned around and walked back to Lavinia before reluctantly handing him over to her. Lavinia could feel how tight Mary's grip was on her son and after a bit of pulling she managed to take the sleeping infant. Giving Mary a small but sad smile, she turned around and began walking back to the carriage with Matthew. Mary let out a sob and ran after her.

'His name is William!' she cried and both Lavinia and Matthew turned around and looked at her in shock, 'my son's name is William,' she repeated, more tears rolling down her wet cheeks. Matthew looked at the woman he loved and could not remember a time where he had seen her look more beautiful than she was now. Her long brown hair was blowing in the wind and her dress was blowing so hard in the wind it was showing her slim figure. He nodded at her before getting into his carriage with Lavinia and William.

'Drive on,' he told the driver and Mary watched them drive away before falling to her knees in hysterics. Anna was beside her almost immediately and Mary desperately clung to her for support as she sobbed.

'Come my lady, we should get ready to return back to London,' Anna said, standing up with Mary and walking her back to the carriage. The ride back to Richard's country house was quiet and Mary felt empty, staring at the empty seat where William had been not yet 10 minutes ago. Mary swallowed another sob and began to reminisce about the events leading up to the ones that occurred today. It had all started with a dance, a dance between herself and Matthew in Downton's great hall.

Reviews would be great please. There will be more chapters and I'm not gonna lie I did feel like crying when I wrote this. If anyone has seen The Prince of Egypt, you'll recognise the snippet of the song if you haven't watched it, watch the river lullaby on youtube to get an understanding of the tune Hope you enjoyed this everyone! x