A/N: reorganized, because there were troubles in viewing Ch 2 (at lest, I had them). AU of TPM. I wanted to write a story about Palpatine training himself, or even simply realising there is a Dark Side of the Force for the first time, but it seemed I couldn't. Let me know if someone does, please!

Disclaimer: not mine. Either plot.


Once upon a time, on a Planet not so far away as many would wish, a Being gained Mastery of the Force.

Now, you can say it is a fine thing to accomplish, but alas, it was quite the Opposite. The Being became a Sith Lord, and for a score of Standard years it'd been visiting Unspeakable Horrors upon what had been previously known as the Old Republic.

It is not my place to speculate how a relatively stable Structure could be overturned by a creature of such a short lifespan (a Human male). The subject has already been exploited in its entirety by much more capable historians, with our inexhaustible holowriters boring even deeper than the Ore of Data could possibly lie. Nothing seems unprofitable anymore, especially the Bedrock of Ignorance; just watch Yoda: The Misunderstood One, or Dreams Come True, or The Skywalker Courtship: A Modest Proposal... But I digress.

The Force, as you might – or, more probably, might not – know, is all-encompassing. It calls, as few Things call, and we obey. It is a Mistake to think that only Jedi are ruled by Its Will. People rarely bothered themselves with Obedience then, and it ultimately led to the Downfall of the Republic. It would have destroyed the Empire that the Sith Lord built, too, if not for the Rebellion.

It will likely be the end of the Rebellion itself, sooner or later.

I mentioned an Empire. You might think that the Power is distributed differently in it than in a Republic, but in truth, a Galaxy is a big place to change things over. The Sith settled for unbalancing the Force, the old fool, and appointed the Dirty Work to the very one prophesised to balance it back. Which he had done, when he became a relatively old fool, too.

Now, the Force is sometimes believed to have a sense of humour, but shh, that's a secret. Don't tell anybody.

Everything went according to the Plan. There've been Minor Corrections, it is only prudent to constantly review a Project of that Scale: compensating for a destroyed planet's gravitational pull; inculcating new breakthroughs in the Energy Science – it is much easier to build a Death Star than to actually move an object of its Inertia, which is why they are no longer on the market. And the staff! Several thousands of eventually doomed civilians do not mix with several hundreds of mostly unoccupied soldiers. Thank Force inter-species conflicts were foreseen and forestalled. And all the Pensions... No. The option is economically unpractical.

What about the Capital being a DS in its own right?

Coruscant had been an anomaly long before your grand-grand-grannies' body plan could be evolutionarily conceivable. It dominates and will dominate, because it can't otherwise survive.

(Yes, the Sith was beneficial enough not to blow this cesspool of lowlife to pieces, and besides, relocating all those officials to a new base would be worth ten Dark Apprentices in Stress).

Yes, there is an ancient Tradition that every Lord or Lady of the Sith must train an Heir. It is an obligation taken very seriously, because Apprentices tend to kill their Teachers, so that there is no Sith Overload, quite unlike Jedi infesting any System they have a hunch about.

Back to the story.

It so happened that the future Sith Lord didn't have a proper Supervisor. He prided himself on being the Last Remain of a Presumably Extinct Race (in a manner of speaking), and it certainly helped not to have to waste Resources on Competition Issues, but it also meant he would have to take care of certain details himself. Fortunately, he liked experimenting.

His first Apprentice was of another Species, and a total failure, meaning that he hadn't lived long enough to even try exterminating his Lord.

However, our Sith was not easily discouraged, and a Capable Learner, meaning that he used only his own breed in his further explorations.

He went through a number of more or less promising candidates until an Opportunity presented itself – or, rather, himself. You see, he took an interest in all Jedi cast-offs he knew of, as a good Sith Lord should always do. It is a Know-How that allows to quickly and effectively quell any spontaneously generated Sith Spawn.

And so...

Once upon a time, on a Death-Star-type Planet, there lived a Sith Lord who had to educate himself in the Ways of the Force, and naturally, he made mistakes. Never mind. No one is perfect. For example, the Jedi who Opposed the Sith wasn't Big, and definitely not Bad, but he did slow the Sith's Apprentice down when the latter tried to keep in touch with his blood relations.

Which was probably for the best, since him meeting said relations was a really traumatic experience for all parties involved.

'Senator? Senator Palpatine!'

'Shock. Blood loss... Keep pressure to the wound...'

'Droids, for the...'

'Not gonna make it...'

'No pulse...'

'Pity. They say... delivering... blockade... Naboo... free...'


Once upon a time, on a Planet where a Basic-speaking sentient should pay close attention to his linguistic skills to weed out unnatural constructions which some of the locals are so fond of, there lived a Princess.

What? Could I please not tell anybody? There's nothing to tell, it's all yet to happen.

She was beautiful, and clever, and brave. And very stubborn. She, too, Opposed the Sith Lord with all her Might.

And lost.

It is difficult to forgive a Politician's mistake. We consider them unerringly corrupt; the Princess was fallible and honest, which is a deadlier combination. I really didn't know her all that well. I spent more effort to study my enemies than my friends. (It cost us a Republic.)

I travelled far, and met different people, who believed in different things. Sometimes, they fought over it, and were called fanatics. We mustn't judge. But sometimes, we must fight, as she did.

By the way, her daughter fought a Sith Lord and won.

'You are old.'

'I am strong and healthy.'

'There are two of them.'

'But the infant - he can't be of any use to you now – '

'He will be.'

'Or he won't be. Release her. I'll work for you for nine years, and then we'll decide about the boy.'

...

'See this thing? You escape, it explodes. Understood?'

'Yes – master.'



And there was another Planet, where there lived a Woman and a Slave. It was harsh, she was kind, he oscillated in between; it took, she gave, he bargained his Silly Head off for a more fair deal. They Coexisted.

Sands covered the Planet, Hutts ruled it, and two Unforgiving Suns burned from above. And yet the Woman loved it.

Any Offwolder in their right mind (and most of the natives, regardless of their mental states) would run away and never return to this Hellhole, given half a Chance. And yet the Slave, who secretly came back from the Future, which is always in motion, so keep going if you don't want to be buried under a shower of Yesterdays, harboured a kind of Kinship towards the Planet. Why? Aw, man, give him a benefit of the doubt... before proclaiming him an old fool he undoubtedly was... isn't our Story a bit depressing...

Well, the Woman, she borne a Boy, who will grow into a – who will grow someday, if I have any say in the matter. And he will be a Good Boy until then. He will not risk his own life in a Podrace, and he will disassemble that protocol disaster and make a vacuum cleaner for his mother instead. Thank you.

No, the Slave wasn't the Boy's father. Yes, he can pretend he is. Not for long. He is busy today; and tomorrow, he leaves – for some time. He's overdue on Coruscant.

Just like the Boy is.

'Mom! Hey, mom! Know what? I met an angel! A true angel!'

'Calm down, dear. Remember, how you were taught? Breath in, out, in, out... Okay. Now, what are you upset about?'

'She said she's not from the Moons of Iego.'

'No, Ani. Some of them aren't.'