Wedding Wars! By: Animated vampire
AN: This was just something that came to me in the oddest way. I was lazily watching t.v. and out of no where I said I'm going to write wedding wars.
Disclaimer: Tis true my fair matey. I own not twilight or any of thy characters. *crowd* BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
I couldn't believe this. Here I was the fashion pixie trying to convince my crazy sister that she was still just as beautiful as before. It all started when Emmett accidentally walked in on Rose when she was getting dressed. Emmett had blinked twice then shrugged mumbling, "It aint nothing I aint seen a million times." Rosalie was in a full panic as I explained that Emmett just had cold feet and was a little nervous. "My monkey man thinks I'm ugly." she cried. I comforted her while watching the clock.
"I'm saggy aren't I?" she scowled. "So what, you're a little perkier but that doesn't mean I should get tossed around like a toy that goes in and out of style." I sighed as her rant began and towed her downstairs. I handed her to Carlisle and stormed up the aisle. Rose was tugging on the wall frame begging not to go. Carlisle gave her one more good yank and carried her down after me. "Family, friends, Bella. I have a confession to make."- I sighed- she announced. "I am not good enough for Emmett Cullen And deserve to burn in h-e- double hockey sticks for being imperfect for my monkey man. Emmett, tell me why am I so ugly to you?" she asked. Emmett thought about it for a few seconds, "Well you've got those horrible purple bags under your eyes, you could be warmer, and your not soft. Plus you're looking irregularly limp…" Rosalie ran off stage and to this day Emmett still hasn't kissed Rose again…
AN: Hope you liked it. My first ff. WHOOT! WHOOT WITH ME! *jumpy jumpy jumpy* now to make me feel better review. Plz?!
