Headcanon 200: The team has to ban Disney movies because of their reactions.
Okay, so maybe I exaggerated everything a little bit.
I do not own anything.
Impulse and Beast Boy rushed into the lounge, Impulse holding up a thin, rectangular box in his hand. The whole team shot them bored looks until Beast Boy spoke up.
"Guys, let's watch this!" Impulse held out the box to reveal the cover: Alice in Wonderland. "It's team bonding!"
Nightwing, Miss Martian, and Superboy exchanged a glance, paling. "I don't think so." "Never." "Forget it." This earned a pout from the two younger boys and a look of disbelief from the rest of the team present. If anyone were to pounce on the idea and encourage it as if their lives depended on it, it would be these three. Anything with the words "team bonding" shouldn't have drawn disapproval, heavy on the dis.
Recognized Kid Flash B03
"What's- oh." Wally stared at the DVD in Impulse's hand uncomfortably. "Is that what I think it is?" Nightwing solemnly nodded.
"They want us to watch it," he explained in a completely serious manner. Wally seemed to reel back in shock and horror.
"No, no, nononono, no way." The team still bore WTF faces at the four original members.
Flashback
It started with the first movie they watched together, Up. Kaldur was hugging a fish plushie and whimpering, Megan was sobbing in Connor's shoulder, who seemed to burst into tears any moment. Wally was yelling his head off in anguish, and even Artemis was biting her lip. But Dick? He just sat there emotionlessly (like BATMAN) and even had the nerve to yawn. Artemis, hating how he made her look wimpy, and Wally, being his best friend, were giving him the most intimidating glare they could muster while looking like they were about to cry, only making Dick mimic Alfred's famous eyebrow raise.
"How could you be so mean?"
"That was the saddest movie I ever watched!"
"'Mis, that was basically the only movie you've ever watched." The two decided to ignore the quip from the Boy Wonder and continue screaming at him.
"How can you not be crying? You are so cruel!"
"I don't get how-"
"You're such a heartless person!"
Kaldur, Megan, and Connor decided to sneak past the angry couple and the poor bird and into the corridors, where the noise was muffled, away from the screaming. Dick, though, wasn't as lucky.
The second movie, Lilo and Stitch, wasn't any better than the previous one.
"Well, that was a nice movie," Wally commented while clicking the off button on the remote. He didn't notice that Connor actually was crying this time. No one noticed it until he pounced on the five of them and enveloped them in a bone-crushing hug.
"I love you guys so much, all of you are my Ohana, I'll love you guys forever and ever and ever and ever..." he sputtered as tears streamed down his cheeks.
Behind his sunglasses, Dick looked up at the boy with pleading eyes. "Please, Supey, I know this is touching and all, but we... need... to... breathe..." Connor, however, refused to let go of his Ohana and they ended up staying in that position for half an hour.
By the time he actually did release them, Dick, Artemis, and Wally were on the ground panting and greedily sucking in the fresh air like no tomorrow. Megan pulled the eighteen to nineteen week olf boy into another comforting hug, being able to handle it with her telekinesis. Kaldur tried to clear his head by going to the pool set up just for him, maybe even try to visit Tula and Garth.
Their mentors came five minutes later to the amusing but confusing scene.
Out of all the movies they watched together, Dick enjoyed the Lion King the least.
Right after Mufasa's fall, he politely excused and propelled himself as far away from the TV set as possible. He couldn't help but see his family falling in the place of Mufasa, and the scene of their death was relived over and over again. He huddled in the air vents, hoping for some alone time. None of them took any mind to his reaction, though when the movie ended, everyone started to take notice.
"Shouldn't Robin be back by now?" Megan asked, a worried tone evident in her voice. Wally started pacing back and forth before realizing he wasn't getting anywhere, so he decided to check every room with his superspeed. Unfortunately, four hours later, the bird was nowhere to be found in any one of those rooms.
"If I was Robin, where would I be? Well, I'm a ninja and a Bat and a Robin, so probably somewhere isolated or up high... the vents maybe?" Artemis wondered aloud, as Wally snapped his fingers, face lighting up with the newfound idea. He disappeared without a word, speeding back with a still-crying boy wonder in his arms, carrying him bridal style. Robin didn't seem to complain, which was terribly out of character for him.
That night the team got a full explanation, background check, and the identity of Robin.
The next one was watched with Zatanna, whose dad let her stay over for the night.
"What are guys doing?" she asked with interest, observing Artemis enter a disk into the player.
"Movie night, it's tradition." Artemis replied casually, shrugging as if this was the most normal thing in the world and it never screwed up before.
Hopefully, with Zatanna, A Goofy Movie wouldn't end in a total disaster of emotion from any of them.
Their hopes ended up being flushed down the drain. Zatanna was the one who was tearing up on Dick's shoulder. Surprised by such a reaction, and crushed by yet another movie night disastrous, they ended up soothing the magician instead of finishing it up, because they has to shut it off as not to bring any more tears from the girl.
Needless to say, Zatanna's joining of the team was postponed.
After hearing of his daughter's breakdown that night, Zatara didn't let her spend another night at the mountain alone with the "irresponsible children" again. At least, not a Friday night. She was still allowed on other times.
Despite their failed attempts of actually getting to watch a movie like normal people (or as normal as they could be), they still tried and made it as realistic a movie theater as they could and tried yet again, this time with Beauty and the Beast. Probably would've been happy enough.
Everything was going just fine until they reached the ballroom scene. At this part, Megan whimpered and blubbered and ran out of the lounge in tears, spilling her popcorn all over the floor. Sighing, the movie had to be turned off and ignored once again as they went to seek out their friend and tell her that it was completely all right. Wally, in the meantime, started eating her popcorn.
So much for a normal night.
The team gave their movie night idea one last chance when they rented out the Fox and the Hound.
The whole thing blew up in their faces a fifth time. Much to everyone's surprise, it was Kaldur who broke down this time, sobbing hysterically while shoveling strawberry ice cream he found somewhere in the back of the fridge down his throat. So much for "calm and level-headed fearless leader". Dick handed him his fish plushie and patted the Atlantean on the head, eyes not leaving the screen. Later, he'd call Tula and Garth over to help their leader "cope with his traumatizing moment". Next to the failsafe simulation, this was probably the worst series of experiences for them.
How was it that Disney movies had such an effect on the Team?
After this, they officially gave up on Movie Night Friday (it was entirely Wally's idea). Rule number 2 of the team: no Disney movies allowed.
"...And that's why we can't watch Alice in Wonderland," Wally explained, while Nightwing crossed his arms across his chest, Megan had a blank look, and Connor started tearing up again thinking about his Ohana.
The new members slowly redirected their eyes back to the things they were working on before, not losing the confused faces.
Okay, so I started getting writer's block at the end. Sue me... I suck at "humor".
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