Number 12, Grimmauld Place (Appearing Hallowe'en Night Only) by Luvscharlie

Warnings: Naughty talk and Bill wishes someone had warned him about Tonks back during his Hogwarts days.

A/N: Originally written for ragdoll at the 2011 hp_halloween exchange on Live Journal where the drabble had to be exactly 200 words.

"We cannot remove the Cloaking Spell on the house for Hallowe'en." Bill admonished Tonks.

"Oh it'll be fun!"

"It will notbe fun when Moody mounts my bollocks on the wall beside those House-elves' heads!"

"Which is why we won't be telling him, moron!"

"The Muggles will be talking about the mysterious house that magically appeared on Hallowe'en, don't you think?"

"Oh, I hope so! Just think of the ghost stories they will be telling about this!" Tonks squeaked with excitement.

"If they come inside next year, they can tell stories about the spectacular penis mounted on the wall."

"Spectacular? Really? You think highly of yourself."

"And that's what you picked to be wrong with that statement? I'm not doing this. It's too risky."

Tonks sighed. "I'll give you blow job and let you make the ghosty sounds to scare any Muggles brave enough to come to the door."

Sirius spoke up from the kitchen. "No way! I already called ghosty sounds."

"Then I get to tell Charlie I fucked you in the arse. Deal?"

"Fine." Tonks began lifting the wards. "You should have held out for more than just telling, Billy-boy." She winked.

Bill groaned. "I fucking hate Hallowe'en."

I have no idea why it was changed on my submission at the community from "ghosty" to "ghostly", as I double-checked the original email I sent and it was right, but it's not a big deal. Here, it is correct and as I meant it to be.