Disclaimer: JKR owns everything and I don't.

Somewhere In the Middle

It does not matter what is fair,

Light or Dark,

Black or White,

It all fades to Gray in the end.

And only at the center,

Will you find Knowledge.

"Why are you asking me questions you already know the answers to?"

Her soft voice drifted over Alexander like a thick cloud. He was utterly confused by her ambiguous comments. His dark eyes stared at her, unbelieving. She was not as beautiful as when he first laid eyes upon her, certainly the dungeons had taken their toll on her looks. Her long dark hair was full of snarls and shined with grease under the lantern's light. Skin that used to glow like moonlight was graying, drawn tight over projecting bones. She had lost a significant amount of weight…not to say that she had ever been heavy. The rags she was clad in hung loose on her frame. He noticed bite marks, bruises, and several large cuts on her arms and neck, and inwardly wished he had discovered her whereabouts sooner. She need not have suffered as she had during the past six months. He would have seen to that. Surely, she had to know this.

"Why didn't you ask for me? Why didn't you tell one of the guards? They would have never left a Lestrange to die in the dungeons!" He was irritated and could not hide it, not that he had ever been able to hide anything from Ismene. She had seen through him from the first day they met at Hogwarts, her, an upstart 6th year Gryffindor, and him, a brooding 7th year Slytherin with a shiny, new Dark Mark.

"And ruin your glory of delivering the only child of Reduald and Cassandra Lestrange?" she laughed bitterly. "Spare me the dramatics, Alexander. You have waited for this opportunity since you first discovered my true identity."

Her comments only increased his agitation. She was right and both of them knew it. From the moment he had discovered her secret, his hands had itched with the anticipation of revealing her presence to the Dark Lord. Using the information to blackmail her, he had insisted Ismene spend every free moment with him, in order to keep a close watch on her. At first, he looked at her as a prize that he was clinging to, but over time he grew to care deeply for her. Only with the invasion of Hogwarts and her subsequent disappearance had he realized that he had fallen for her.

"Dammit Ismene, it isn't like that! I waited for you for five hours! Why didn't you come? I could have protected you!" He had warned her of the invasion, believing that she would turn to him for safety. Five long hours he had waited in the Forbidden Forest, suffering in the pouring rain, and constantly reassuring himself that she would come. She had to. He loved her after all. Alexander had never actually said it aloud to her, but surely his forewarning her of the attack must have let her know.

"What would you have done Alexander, hide me away?" she asked wearily.

"Yes!"

She sighed deeply, and he watched her smooth her chapped hands together. "It never would have worked…you know that. Someone would have figured it out eventually, and then they would have killed you as well."

"Rubbish! Your father pulled it off," he replied angrily, pacing the narrow confines of the stone-walled room.

Her eyes narrowed with resentment. "Only for fifteen years...then Lucius finally found them."

"Lucius? As in Lucius Malfoy?" Alexander asked incredulously.

"The one and only. I watched from the landing upstairs as he murdered both of them. My father always used to disillusion me whenever we had customers. That's the only reason I'm still alive." Ismene thought back to that day. Peering over the dusty railing of her parent's run-down apothecary, she had seen the flashes of green light and then a man with white blonde hair leaning over the still bodies of her mother and father.

Ismene had been broken-hearted, but she had made sure to follow the instructions her mother had given her in case anything had ever happened to them. Taking the sealed letter from where it was hidden in her parent's room, Ismene had felt tears well up in her eyes as she stared at her mother's curly handwriting.

Albus Dumbledore, Headmaster

Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry

A few hours after sending the letter off with an owl, the wizened old wizard had appeared and spirited Ismene to Hogwarts. There Professor McGonagall and he had decided that it would be best if she was placed under an assumed name into Gryffindor. Surely, no one would suspect the daughter of a Lestrange to be amongst the lions, and so she had become Laurel Patterson, a quiet 6th year Gryffindor.

"Why didn't they fight him? Surely, they had to know what he was planning to do?"

Alexander's harsh words broke through her reverie and she gazed up at his hulking figure. "That's the thing about using Polyjuice Potion…they never knew it was him until it was too late." A single tear slipped down her dirty cheek.

"I'm so sorry, Ismene," Alexander whispered as he knelt in front of the wooden chair she was sitting in. "It doesn't mean they would hurt you now."

"You're a fool Alexander Montague," she spat. "Bellatrix hated my mother for taking Reduald away from his brothers. I'm sure she would love to take out her revenge on me!" Her eyes softened when she saw the sadness reflected in his dark eyes. He was such an enigma, cold and unfeeling towards everything and everyone except for her. After the first time they slept together, he had confessed that it unnerved him to no end that she could see his every emotion, but some how he liked it. Ismene could still picture the knit of his brow as he tried to justify these new feelings aloud, and then his gentle kiss when all his words failed, and all she could see in his eyes was sincerity. She had begun to fall in love with him right then, even though she knew it could never be.

Alexander could see the resignation in her amber eyes. More than anything, he wanted to pick her up and carry her out of this dirty place, never to look back. He had spent the past six months carrying out his duties; leading raids, torturing muggles, interrogating prisoners, and all the while searching for any sign of her. He even had Warrington and Pucey on the look out as well, and it was Adrian that finally got wind of her present location.

"Why did your parents refuse to join the Dark Lord in the first place?"

"My mother didn't believe in sides. She thought there was a middle to everything and that only through knowledge would you find the true balance."

"Ravenclaw through and through, huh?" he asked, and she nodded in return. "What about your father though…he was a Lestrange for Merlin's sake!"

"Yes, but he was also a Slytherin. His own means came before anyone else's, and what he wanted more than anything was my mother. He was obsessed with her and did what it took to keep her," she answered, her voice laced with sadness.

Alexander sighed deeply and ran his fingers through his curly hair. What was he to do? The situation seemed hopeless from every side. He rubbed his eyes, bleary from the constant darkness of the dungeons. How had she survived in this hole? The air was putrid and permeated with the stench of death. Alexander felt himself growing nauseous. He needed fresh air, but hated to leave her like this.

Ismene saw the conflicting emotions in his eyes. "Go Alexander, it is not wise for you to be here. The other guards will get suspicious."

"I can't leave you here…not like this." He looked disgustedly at the dirty floor, soaked with water and urine. A thin mattress with a threadbare blanket was the only other contents besides the wooden chair. By the door, a wooden bowl with bracken water and moldy bread lay unceremoniously. The room was fit for mudbloods and muggles…not her.

"I've suffered through much more in my time here then just filthy accommodations and meager food," she said quietly. Noting the mix of surprise and guilt in his face, she added, "I don't need your pity."

"Ismene…"

"Please just go. Go and don't look back." Ismene tried to keep her voice even, hoping not to betray her true feelings. It would be safer for him this way, she reasoned. Ultimately, if the Dark Lord found out that Alexander was hiding her it would be his death, and she could not have that on her conscious.

He hated hearing the coldness in her voice. All he wanted to do was help her. Why couldn't she see that? "You don't mean it," he challenged.

She lifted her eyes to his face. "I most certainly do. Why do you think I didn't come to you before the invasion? I don't love you, Alexander." She paused but continued to gaze unflinchingly at him. "It was all pretend. I never cared for you and I never will." Watching the range of emotions flit across his face, surprise, doubt, then anger, Ismene felt her heart breaking. It would never work she reminded herself. This was the only way to keep him safe. As long as she knew that he lived and breathed, that was enough for her. "I figured out early on that as long as I could keep you satisfied you wouldn't go telling anyone my secret." Ismene saw the disbelief in his eyes and laughed sarcastically. "Did you honestly think I could love someone like you? You're a Death Eater, nothing more than a heartless, cruel monster!"

"You're lying!" he shouted, all the well clenching his hands into fists.

"Not anymore." Ismene continued, knowing that her words would bring him pain, but ultimately they would prevent his death. "Do you know how hard it was for me to let you touch me? Having your slimy fingers all over me made me want to vomit and every time you kissed me, I wished I was kissing a corpse instead! You disgust me Alexander Montague."

Silent rage coursed through Alexander's veins. How dare she lie to me? Fucking bitch! To think…I honestly thought I loved her. I was willing to give up everything to save her. But it was a ruse…she used me, played me, all to keep herself safe, and now look at her; bruised and beaten. His anger boiled over and Alexander spat at Ismene's huddled figure. The discharge hit her right below her eye and slowly dripped down her face, mixing with dirt and tears. Without a further word, Alexander turned his back and walked out of the dungeon room.

Ismene listened to his footsteps echo down the stone hallway. When they faded out, she flung herself on the dirty mattress and let the wrenching sobs that had been threatening to unleash ever since he had appeared earlier, overtake her tiny frame. She didn't know how long she cried for, but exhaustion slowly took hold of her and she fell into a fitful sleep.