My first Bleach oneshot! I hope I did well.

Disclaimer: I do not own Bleach.


Hitsugaya was on his way to his office when he heard whining and shuffling coming from inside. He froze outside the closed door. It was probably Matsumoto on the couch moaning in her sleep. Sighing, he opened the door and prepared to tell her off for sleeping on his couch.

She wasn't doing what he thought she was doing though. Her back was turned towards the door and it looked like she was struggling with something. She gave a frustrated sigh and her hand movements got faster. Rolling his eyes, Hitsugaya quietly walked right behind her.

"What are you doing, Matsumoto?"

"EEP! !"

Matsumoto spun around to see her captain standing behind her with his arms folded. One of her hands was holding the front of her shihakusho and her other hand deep between her...'mountains'.

"T-taichō! Don't sneak up on me!" she gasped, not moving her hands from where they were. Hitsugaya's eyes twitched at the sight.

"You didn't answer my question. And please remove your hands from that awkward position."

Matsumoto obeyed and straightened the front of her clothes.

"Ok, I got some gum from the World of the Living since I never tried it before." She made animated gestures as she told her story. "Then when I came back to Soul Society, I suddenly felt very sleepy so I came over here. But then I really wanted to try out the gum so I put it in my mouth. But I fell asleep! I guess I slept with my mouth open and it fell out of my mouth and into my boobs. So now I'm trying to get it out, but it's hard! I know it's in there but I can't find it!"

Hitsugaya sighed and rubbed his temples. Matsumoto and her stupid actions.

"Matsumoto, you can't chew gum and sleep at the same time. You're lucky you didn't swallow it."

"Taichō," Matsumoto said, peering down her front while Hitsugaya made his way to his desk. "I don't know what to do! How can I get it out? !"

"Use your zanpakutō." he answered, getting out his brush. He started to do his paperwork.

Matsumoto snapped her head up.

"WHAT? ! That's painful to think of!"

"You're on your own then."

Matsumoto stayed quiet for a few seconds. She looked down her front again, trying in vain to find the gum. It was too deep and she was still unable to see it.

"Can you help me?"

"And how do you expect me to do that?"

"It's easy! Just use your hands, plunge them in, and grab it out!" She mimed pulling out the gum.

Those two sentences made Hitsugaya start.

"M-Matsumoto! I can't do that!"

"It's ok, I'm perfectly fine with it!"

"What if somebody sees? Do you want me to ruin my reputation?"

"Please taichō! Just look! See if it's there! PLEASE! ! !"

"No."

"Please!"

"No!"

"Taaaaichoooou! !"

"Matsumoto..."

Matsumoto started to pout and whine, making Hitsugaya even more irritated.

"Matsumoto, stop."

More whining. A vein throbbed in Hitsugaya's forehead.

"I'm warning you."

She gave him her best pout.

"That won't work. If you can't get it out, just ignore it and do your paperwork."

"But-!"

"No, Matsumoto. Just let me have some peace and quiet."

Matsumoto stayed silent, to Hitsugaya's relief. Unfortunately for him, it lasted five seconds.

"But if it's there I'll be uncomfortable and I'll make noise! It's unsanitary!"

Hitsugaya sighed.

"If you want quiet, you'll help me!"

"I'd rather have the noise than do... that."

"Come on!"

"No!"

"Please!"

"Don't start this again."

After what seemed like an hour of Matsumoto's constant pleading and their arguing back and forth, Hitsugaya finally gave in, just to get her to stop bothering him. Well, he nearly froze her to death first.


Right when he finally retrieved the gum, the door opened. Hitsugaya froze in place, holding the gum in his hand while Matsumoto cheered and ran around the place like a idiot screaming that she was free.

Ichimaru Gin walked into the room, wearing his usual taunting grin. It didn't falter even when he saw Matsumoto stop in mid-jump and Hitsugaya holding a chewed up piece of gum, looking slightly embarrassed, guilty, and slightly disgusted.

"Huh? What's happenin' here? Am I missing somethin'?" Gin said as he looked from Matsumoto to Hitsugaya.

"Gin!" Matsumoto jumped over to Gin and happily grabbed his arm. "Taichō is so kind! He helped get-" Matsumoto stopped mid sentence when the room temperature dropped and Hitsugaya gave her an icy stare. "Nothing."

The temperature went back to normal and Hitsugaya folded his arms. He kept his face impassive, but he didn't know his cheeks were still slightly pink.

"Nothing important."

"Oh," Gin said. "Well I just wanted to check up on you guys an' see if you're alright." Hitsugaya raised an eyebrow. "Mata ne!" Gin said lazily, raising his hand in farewell and walking out of the room.

Hitsugaya sighed in relief, at least in his head. That was close! Any earlier and he would have been caught in the act! He especially didn't want to get caught by the likes of Ichimaru Gin. If Gin saw Hitsugaya doing that to his childhood friend...let's not think about it.

"Oh, I forgot. Hitsugaya taichō." Gin's smirking face slowly slid into view from behind the door. Hitsugaya started, creeped out by the slightly terrifying sight. Gin's face split into an even bigger sadistic grin.

"I saw... what you did."

Hitsugaya's face drained of color as Gin disappeared from the door.

"Ne! M-Matte, Ichimaruuuu!"

Hitsugaya ran after Gin who was, in no doubt, going to tell every other captain about this humiliating event. Hitsugaya's reputation was ruined.

THE END


Yeah, I love putting my favorite characters in awkward situations. :D I am so proud of this story! Please tell me how I did! Criticism is appreciated!