You and I, we're like fireworks and symphonies exploding in the sky. With you, I'm alive. Like all the missing pieces of my heart, they finally collide.
I hated hospitals, the smell of disinfected that covered the halls, the moaning and groaning of the sick. It was all too much, I had lost too many people in hospitals, and I was about to lose another one. One that is so dear to my heart and I was going to lose her. I stood in the cramped hallway staring at room 302's wooden door. She laid right behind that door in that hospital bed. I have been here so many times before, but this visit was different. This visit was going to be the last one.
So, stop time right here in the moonlight. 'Cause I don't ever wanna close my eyes.
Grabbing the doorknob, I turned and opened the door, thanking the heavens that she had her own room. I couldn't do this if she had a roommate. The one that I can say about this room that it was cramped. Dominated by a bed, it took up most of the room, with a bedside table and a comfortable chair that sat next to the bed. The room was decorated in colors designed to be restful, but come off as akin to a decorator's choice for a funeral home. It was trying to give off the feel of someone's bedroom, but lacked personality, and it was cold in here. The bed looked very uncomfortable and lumpy even with the body in it.
The blankets looked and felt scratchy, I didn't know how she could do it. Sitting down on the chair next to the bed I scooted as close to her as I can. Her usual ivory skin was now gray and sickly looking, and the once peach-pink color hair that was on top of her beautiful head was now gone. Her once slender, thin build was thinner, to where you would be able to see her rib bones. "Amethyst ..." Her voice was hoarse and barely audible. Her eyes opened, the sky-blue that they once held were now almost a dull gray with barely any light in them.
Without you, I feel broke. Like I'm half of a whole. Without you, I've got no hand to hold. Without you, I feel torn. Like a sail in a storm. Without you, I'm just a sad song. I'm just a sad song.
Looking at her it feels like there's a whole weight on my heart, and I'm just letting her slip away from me. It hurts eve more when I looked into her eyes because they don't hold that sparkle or spunk she used to have before all of this. "Pearl ... don't speak ..." I whispered and grabbed her cold hand into mine. My heart was sinking, it feels like I was gonna have nothing to live for once she is gone. Once I finally can go back to the house, it'll be empty. I will never hear her singing voice while she is cooking us dinner, I'll never again hear her sing in the shower. It's going to be cold and lifeless. I'm never going to be happy again, she was my love of my life.
She got on my nerves, but that was okay because that's what she did best. Tears were falling on my cheeks now as I watched her lying in that bed, only minutes left to live. "Pearl ... please ... don't leave ... you can fight this. You have been so strong, look how far you have made it. Fight longer please." I begged and held her cold hand up to my face, holding it close. I didn't want the love of my life to leave this world, she was there for me through thick and thin. She was there when I had nowhere else to go, she made me laugh and I made her laugh. All my greatest memories are with her.
With you I fall. It's like I'm leaving all my past in silhouettes upon the wall. With you I'm a beautiful mess. It's like we're standing hand in hand with all our fears upon the edge.
"Hush, it will all be okay ..." with her shaky hand, she grabbed my cheek, a smile was on her face. "I'll be in a better place, Amethyst ... I'll be able to see my parents again ... I-I'll be able to see Rose again. Please don't cry over me ..." Her voice was fading as she spoke, I had to lean a bit closer to hear her speak. I took in gulps of air trying to not break down crying as I practically watched the light fade out of her eyes. "Remember ... you have ... Steven to take care of. And the others ... you still have the others ... baby ... I love you so much ... r-remember ... t-that okay?" Her breathing was slowly down and her hand was starting to become stone in my hand. "Tell the others ... they'll ever be in ... my ... hear-"
So, stop time right here in the moonlight, 'Cause I don't ever wanna close my eyes.
Every single second I shared with her passed across my mind, I couldn't make the tears stop, and all my regrets about giving her a hard time kept jumping out at me making me feel guilty. I could not comprehend that she was really gone. Never again would I see her all happy and giggly, or her seriousness. Never again would she wink at me when she was around our friends and he was feeling a bit wild. Never again would I see her smiling face. I could not comprehend that she wasn't still in there, and this wasn't just a sick joke.
In my mind, I kept seeing her open her eyes, and yell at me for crying over her ... It was the worst thing in the world. As I stared at her hearing the heart monitor go flat was in that moment I knew she was gone. I reached over and closed her eyes, so I wouldn't have to see the lifelessness off her. I looked at her body, but there's nothing there, like her soul has been emptied from her body.
Without you, I feel broke. Like I'm half of a whole. Without you, I've got no hand to hold. Without you, I feel torn. Like a sail in a storm. Without you, I'm just a sad song.
"I love you too, my dear Pearl." I leaned down and kissed her chapped lips for the last time, before standing up. "May your journey be safe, Godspeed." I softly touched her cheek, until I turned around wiping my tears away. I needed to be strong as I walked out of the hallway. "She is no longer with us ..." I told a nurse in a whisper. "Please take good care of her." She nodded and we departed ways. It's hard to process that you'll never hear that person speak again, smile at you again, laugh again, you'll never see them do anything, it's like they were a fragment of your imagination and you grasp onto your memories of them, but the memories all seem like dreams.
You're the perfect melody. The only harmony I wanna hear. You're my favorite part of me. With you standing next to me. I've got nothing to fear.
I walked into the lobby to where my waiting friends are. My body that held me together was now failing as I fell to my knees and they ran over to me. "She's gone ... and she's never coming back." I screamed tears falling down my cheeks and onto the floor. I love you so much, Pearl. Godspeed
A/N: Shortest story I wrote in a very long time. Tell me if I ripped your hearts out please. -XDOMOX
