The Rare Shindo Experience

Well, it's been almost six months since Sai left. Memories of Fujiwara no Sai were compressed into the shape of a traditional pocket fan. I've got to the point where I occasionally spoke with the fan, having named it 'Sai' and personalized it with its own bundle of long purple hair. Yes, I had a conversation with my fan. We talked about ramen and girls last night. Okasan tried to arrange me a meeting with Tadaki-san, her close friend and physiotherapist. She claimed that I was acting 'peculiarly' for a mentally healthy 16 year old. And she also told me that having imaginary friends is considered normal until one reaches a tender age of 12... I yelled at her. I had to yell at her. Okasan was trying to sell out my pride.

"I was only practicing for our play next month!", I lied. But Okasan knew better. They don't stage plays in Professional Go exhibitions. She's been having doses of 'Go Weekly' for the last few weeks.

"I know dear", she said perceptively. But I knew better.

But, enough about mental health. Six months after Sai's departure. I've grown up physically and morally... And mentally, I guess. I'm now a 2nd grade pro after accomplishing 12 straight victories in all competitions. Go matches have been peppering me thick and fast lately, but I haven't given up on my academic progress. I'm currently studying at Tokisetsu high school... with Akari. Yes, Akari and I are still going to the same school.

"It's either fate or you're not letting me go", she joked.

That quote left me speechless and squirming for fresh air. I disagreed with both but it felt like reality was jabbing me on the ribs. It's not a secret that I've been seeing her as more than the 'annoying-female-friend-next-door' I used to know... And rumors about us going out more frequently were somewhat correct. Although some of them were 'inflated'... Some bastards claimed they witnessed Akari and I making out in some telephone booth. Yeah right...

And some prat claimed that I was dating Toya! I yanked the hot-mouthed worm by the collar... And surprise, surprise... it was Ochi. It was Mr. four-eyed bowlhead who started the twisted gossip.

"Spread the word and I'll jam the 'Go-ban' down your throat", I threatened. He fizzled out of the scene since then. Some claimed that he fled to Korea. Oh well...

What had become of the other jackass, Toua? Well, nothing has changed. We still share the daily fiery argument at the Go salon. We still have utmost respect for each other. Well, other than Toya upgraded into 5th grade, nothing's changed... Wait, we got to know each other better lately. And I found out that he's into duckling-themed accessories... He's really into ducks. And he's proud of them. I swear, there were at least five duck-themed items per square inch of his room. And he showcased every single one of them like they were prized Go trophies. And Okasan said I'm the one having mental problems... Yeah, other than that, everything's same ol' same ol'.

"Shindo! You imbecile! Put that back!", Toya roared when I fiddled with his most treasured 'Ugly Duckling' shaped pearl. He ended up sterilizing the darned rock for a week. He stated that my 'mucky and polluted palms !' would deteriorate the glazing minerals of the pearl and it would gradually ruin his life... Yeah, right. And I'm the God of Go, Mr. Don't-touch-my-duckies.

Anyways, nothing's changed with my former Insei mates. Waya's a 3rd grade pro while Isumi and Honda had finally began their professional journeys. Nase and Fuku were still Inseis... But enough about them goodies. I'm supposed to focus on Akari.

Akari. She had changed. For the good. It seems like Leonardo Da Vinci had carved her body shape during puberty. Her curves would tempt a saint! I remembered the time when I first noticed her evolution. It was just after I got promoted into a 2nd grade pro, around June.

"Hikaru! Mitani-kun told me you got promoted!", Akari ran up to me, congratulating. I smiled gratefully. But then, my primal instincts erupted when I glanced at her figure. The glance grew into a gape. Since it was summer, Akari wore this white sleeveless dress and a pink mini-skirt and Bam! There it was. Such divinely sculpted contours. And her textbook hips. Damn. I thought the sinful view caught me winded. But it was actually Akari's knee buried three inches in my abdomen.

"Pervert!", she scolded. I ended up buying her dinner that evening. She had this little thing against perverts saying that they belong in the deepest and meanest trenches of Hell. She also said that I was 'very lucky' to be someone she cared about. Saying that I would've gone bald if I wasn't. Yeah, right Akari.

Ever since that incident, she was a regular fixture in my daily routine. Whether by phone, movies, dinner, hanging out and other stuff. We were suddenly more open to each other. Before, our conversations usually relate to Go and friends. Now, we're talking about anything that cross our minds. Without realizing, we became more than good friends... Yeah, that thing... Everything was so perfect. Well, except for that one argument we had at the Spring Carnival.

"Hikaru no baka! You can't tell between my feelings and a roadkill!", she bawled and ran to the nearest lavatory. She had a point though. Sometimes I don't really understand her. That's because her feelings can resemble roadkill since it's all muddled up and comes out indistinguishable. You can't really tell whether she's depressed or whether she's on the warpath. Confused, I trailed her whereabouts and reasoned some sort of apology in which I wasn't sure what for. We ended up star-gazing until midnight.

When I got home, Okasan had a disappointed look pasted on her sleepy face. She knew that Akari and I were going out that night and she was worried over the consequences.

"No, Okasan. I did not touch her. And yes, Okasan. I know where babies come from", I droned as I dragged my legs into my bedroom. Okasan can be a real pain in the neck, sometimes.

"If it's not one thing, then it's your mom", Suion once told me. Now that's philosophy for ya. Don't even get to the topic of 'women' in general. I'm very sure that my Korean rival will make millions writing that sort of book. I've got to admit, the brat's a genius.

Unlike me, Suion's got courage. He was balls enough to make some sort of offensive statement regarding women. Once, I wrongfully complained about Akari's troublesome mood swings.

"Akari... What's with your mood swings? You're like a pregnant cow", I sulked. But it got ugly. Akari giggled as if my statement was some hilarious joke to laugh about. Then, she proceeded to pick up her biology textbook before promptly battering me with the said item. The biology textbook, being the the darned thickest book on the planet, not to mention hard-covered, left me sprawled on the cold floor of the school corridor. It was recess, so there were other students and teachers in the corridor who didn't bother about Akari beating me to death. It was as if the whole beat-me-up thing was normal, seeing that no one cared to restrain Akari. I raised my head, facing her and was still expecting an answer. She basically tilted her head and smiled sweetly. That gave it all away...

"Oh, it's a female thing", I grinned in realization before passing out. It resulted in me missing two pro Go matches.

Sticking with school as the subject, Akari and I were reunited with our former senior and a certain red-headed nimrod. Tsutsui-san and Mitani, respectively. To the delight of Akari, Tsutsui-san had established Tokisetsu's Go club and there were a couple of members in it.

Tsutsui-san hadn't changed much since the last time I saw him. Still as welcoming and kind as he was. And his skills had also enhanced, according to Akari. He was still the old Tsutsui-san we used to know... Well, except for the fact that he became a womanizer. Rumors and his popularity soared ever since he was caught dating some girl. There were claims that three girls once slept with him. But as expected, Tsutsui-san innocently denied the speculation. But some of the gossips were pretty convincing. Once, I told Akari to stay away or be careful around Tsutsui-san. I was rewarded with a harsh bop on the forehead for that advice.

"You worry too much!", she yelled out.

Mitani grew an inch taller than me, but he had not (for the sake of him) grown up. He was still colder than the blizzards at the Antarctic and I was always awarded with the 'silent treatment' every single time we interact. Why? It was because he was still sore about my decision to become an Insei two years ago. He still regards me as 'the biggest traitor he had ever known'. You'd think that after 20 months, he would mature, start a new life and forget the 'bitter' and 'miserable' past that had 'haunted' him... But no... Sheesh, jackass... Yeah, other than that, he became an Insei and was rarely present at school... Jackass.

Moving away from school, there was tragic news about the death of Kuwabara-sensei. Yeah, the old geezer died in a freak accident. I was amused when I saw the news at the television. Not because I never liked the old ape... And not because I was relieved about the 'retirement' of another Go powerhouse... But because I like to see intimidating people in pain. I may not look like it, but I'm a sadistic bastard at heart. And I will always be one. Therefore, I didn't cry like Waya and I didn't bother going to his funeral like Toya and other Go enthusiasts. The late Kuwabara-sensei died due to heart failure. Sometimes reality can be disappointing... I always fantasize Kuwabara-sensei accidentally swallowing some Go stones and gradually chokes to death. I would laugh every time I imagine him dying with a purple face and the expressions of everyone when Go stones were discovered in his windpipe during his autopsy. And then the humorous headlines that would be printed boldly at Go magazines and newspapers : 'Go legend died in super-freaky accident!'... But reality was lame. Heart failure? Boring...

Coincidentally, the death of Kuwabara-sensei marked the dominance of another marvel. Ogata-sensei. This guy's talent was usually overshadowed by the ever-conquering Toya Meijin and the Honinbou title holder, the late Kuwabara-sensei. Whether he practiced voodoo rituals, which resulted in the death of Kuwabara-sensei. Or whether he threatened to murder Toya Koyo's family, it didn't matter. Ogata-sensei's strength in the Go field would match anyone. So he marched on and got what he deserved, dominance. The white-suit-wearing Ogata-sensei was usually as calm as a rock. Aside from the whole 'let me play with Sai!' thing, he never raised his voice nor show any emotions. Always a poker-face... When he's notsick, that is. Once, he was struck down with a fever and I came to his place, asking how he felt.

"How am I feeling?! Oh, I feel great! Because it feels like some invisible, evil freak of nature is clamping my head for amusement! And my nose is running more than I will ever do in a marathon! Do I feel great?! No!!! I feel MISERABLE!!!", he ranted in response. He continued to vent his frustration by yelling some 'well-chosen' words to his pet-fishies. Yeah, Ogata-sensei would suffer a period of trauma every time fever hacked him good.

Waya was as spooked as anyone after the Ogata-rant experience. Ever since then, Waya and I kept our distance from Ogata-sensei and we would run like Hell when he's approaching.

Waya, after getting promoted into 3rd-Dan, had suffered difficulties and would usually end up frustrated and as worn-out as his age old sneakers. I remember when he was on a losing streak and got head over heels crazy after failing to endure Ochi's arrogant trash-talking.

"Listen BRAT! One more word from you and I'll promise that you're gonna donate some blood to the floor!", Waya got fierce as bundles of veins popped up randomly on his temples. By now, Waya had clenched his teeth so hard, his jaws literally snapped out of place.

Unfortunately, Ochi never saw Waya's threat lethal, or real for his sake. And he went overboard. For a Go prodigy, Ochi was quite daft in this situation. You'd think that being a professional Go player who lives, breathes, eats and sleeps Go, Ochi would knowexactly when to retreat... But no... His over-inflated ego got the better of the situation. So he went on to express his opinions about Waya's 'toothless' offensive tactics.

"Well, as I was saying, you could've survived longer had you polished up your tactics against a beginner... The way you played against my defense, it was like a blind puppy running itself against a wall... Pathetic", he pointed out.

Ah... Bad move there. Very, very bad move.

Waya proceeded to pounce at the shorter, four-eyed and physically fragile Ochi. I was quite lucky to witness the fight scene live. I was scouting them from some hidden corner. And being a sadistic mule, I was enjoying every minute of it. I could also hear their conversation, battlecries and in Ochi's case, shrieks of agony clearly. So, about the fight, Waya was slowly fulfilling his promise as droplets of blood from Ochi's flesh and nose colored the grey, tiled floor. I never intended to help or stop any of them. And if I did intervene, I would be joining Waya's side and help him grind the meat out of the brat.

But, just then, Honda-san and Isumi-san had found themselves in the odd situation.

"Reinforcements... Help me...", Ochi weakly pleaded for Honda-san and Isumi-san's assistance. But it got ugly.

Ochi's so-called 'reinforcements' turned their back against the bowlhead. Seeing that Isumi and Honda began to volley fists and kicks onto the hapless kid. And he was gradually transforming into a puddle of crimson blood. And I could not stop laughing. I was glad that Akari wasn't round. She would've panicked and told me to help the 'poor little kid'. Ah... The good times. The next day, Ochi moved out to Okinawa. Oh, now he's retreating... Jackass...

Oh yeah, Kurata-san got stumped by cholesterol. This happened about autumn, just after he lost to
Ogata-sensei in the final of the Honinbou title match. I was in a cinema that time with Akari. We were right at the climax of the Japanese-dubbed Spongebob Squarepants movie, when Toya rang my cellphone regarding Kurata-san's condition.

"You owe me and my date movie tickets", was all I said before I hung up. Toya was urgently giving me details about coronary this and that, which hospital and which ward... And I totally missed the ending! Even Akari couldn't concentrate on the flick.

So, right after the credits rolled, Akari and I unwillingly stomped our way to the said hospital and ward room. Toya took away our moods. Well, I wouldn't really mind if I got interrupted during the climax of... say 'Meet the Fockers' or '2046'... But this was Spongebob and Patrick! Unforgivable. Although Akari and I hated the Hasselhoff scene... But still...

We bought fruits and flowers for Kurata-san, but half of them were rotten. Yeah, we felt as bitter as the blackened, maggot-stuffed apples we bought the said patient. Akari told me to give some of the bad fruits to Toya. But when we arrived at the ward room, we were taken aback by the scene that had met our eyes. Kurata-san was half-conscious and was wearing a gas mask. I figured that he had difficulty breathing. But it was his physical state that tore our minds from stuffing rotten fruits down Toya's windpipe. Kurata-san was notably larger than the last time I met him. He was bloated and I almost mistook him for a blimp. He was so large that they literally needed four patient beds to accommodate his helpless body. Now that's large. Akari and I spent the rest of the day joking and comforting the 'blimp', though we ignored and glared Toya from time to time.

Two weeks later, Kurata-san was magically back to normal, thanks to our rotten fruits. He told me that the doctors made him eat all of the bad fruits to get rid of all the 'excessive' adipose tissues and cholesterol. Whether he was telling the truth or not... Or whether he knew that we intentionally bought the rotten fruits, it didn't matter. Because he gratefully thanked me and Akari and bought us some ramen. As for Toya, he actually apologized and bought us new tickets for the Spongebob movie. So Akari and I finally got to watch the ending without any particular interruptions. Right after the movie, me and Akari hung out at the local park until midnight, doing private not-too-intimate stuff that couples usually do... Like what? Go figure.

After slowly walking Akari home, I was greeted by my worried mom at my place. She seemed concerned about what Akari and I were doing until midnight.

"Don't worry Okasan", I assured her, " I know where babies come from"

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