A/N hey guys this is new and it's my first fic be nice tell me if you liked
it
Paring" L/L R/T
Disclaimer: I don't own any of the characters except of the ones I make up,
I don't own the Gilmore girls!
CHAPTER ONE Dear, Chris
If you count on me, I'll count on you, but when you hurt me, you take all that trust away, and then you ask if I can count on you, and when the answer is no you get upset and walk away, well what can I do?? I can't exactly trust you? Its hard to say that we can be where were before where we started before. Sometimes I feel bad for forgetting that I am not the only one who suffered I must admit that you and I have had good times but it had to end, and now its broken. Can I say that I hated every bad part of you, no I couldn't there was so much I loved, so much I trusted so much I believed was good. It was hard to see you fit the frame of a pathetic selfish jerk. But it was there it was hiding so well I wish I had seen it before I fell for the one guy I thought I would never want, I promised my self I wouldn't do it again, I am no so great at keeping promises as you can tell. So what is the answer now there is no answer you we cant do this anymore we cant go on like this anymore you hurt too many times and I am moving on, so this where it starts to hurt, I no longer want to hear from you, I no longer want to see you, I no longer want you to refer to me, I don't exist to you and you don't exist to me. This is how it has to be we can't hurt each other any more I will not stand another second of this pain.
Love Lor
How hard was that? It was hard but I had to do it for his good and mine. It needed to be said, so much we kept silent, I have had enough, he needs to know how I feel, I just cant tell him face to face, and I suppose that this letter is a cowards way out, but I was never the brave one or the confrontational one, he had those markets cornered, but I didn't want the pain that this caused me to continue because if it did I would be on a downward spiral, and frankly I was not prepared to deal with that, so I had to this for my sake. At least now we can stop pretending, we can stop with the fake smiles we can stop with the act, I wanted to be free of what he was for so long, this burden that this was the way it had to be. It never had to be that way it could have ended with this so long ago. Why the charade that it could continue when it couldn't. I left the letter in a pink envelop knowing he would know who it was from, it was the thought that I had to leave that scared me more than life its self, but Rory needed better than this and I had to give her that, it was my duty as a mother.
Lorelai packed their bags up and put them in the car, she had rented for the trip to Stars hollow she had been planning this for weeks, she knew that it was coming but she decided that tonight would be the night, Chris was coming back tomorrow from some business trip she haldnt cared to ask when he told her he was leaving for a month. It wasn't important she knew it wasn't a business trip, even though she wanted to believe that more than anything. Was Rory in on this little scheme of theirs, yes she was, she was happy her mother had finally taken action she had been begging her mother for so long, she had been begging for longer than she cared to remember, where were they headed? They were headed back to stars hollow where Rory had grown up and spent her days until she was sixteen and her mother had rekindled her relationship with her dad, Chris, and it was great at the begging, so why were they leaving now? Why were they packing up the jeep they rented in the dead silent of the night, so no one would know where they were headed? Because her father turned out to be the biggest conniving jerk and loser of all time, he cheated on her mother constantly and he drank, and in turn constantly abused her, and she was almost target for one of rages when her mother stood in front of her and protected her. But that was all ending now.
They piled into the jeep ready to go.
"well this is it ready Ror, you ready to say good bye?" asked Lorelai, in a voice that could only mean one thing fear.
"yes, I am ready I have been ready for a long time, mom don't worry he wont try, he will leave us alone, he will, you know how much he hated it when he last ran into Luke he wouldn't do it again, you and I both know, Luke is the one person Dad is scared of" Rory said squeezing her moms hand and giving her a reassuring smile. She then reached for the radio and pumped until the day I die and her mom pressed the gas pedal and they were off, to another begging, one that didn't include abuse and hate.
CHAPTER ONE Dear, Chris
If you count on me, I'll count on you, but when you hurt me, you take all that trust away, and then you ask if I can count on you, and when the answer is no you get upset and walk away, well what can I do?? I can't exactly trust you? Its hard to say that we can be where were before where we started before. Sometimes I feel bad for forgetting that I am not the only one who suffered I must admit that you and I have had good times but it had to end, and now its broken. Can I say that I hated every bad part of you, no I couldn't there was so much I loved, so much I trusted so much I believed was good. It was hard to see you fit the frame of a pathetic selfish jerk. But it was there it was hiding so well I wish I had seen it before I fell for the one guy I thought I would never want, I promised my self I wouldn't do it again, I am no so great at keeping promises as you can tell. So what is the answer now there is no answer you we cant do this anymore we cant go on like this anymore you hurt too many times and I am moving on, so this where it starts to hurt, I no longer want to hear from you, I no longer want to see you, I no longer want you to refer to me, I don't exist to you and you don't exist to me. This is how it has to be we can't hurt each other any more I will not stand another second of this pain.
Love Lor
How hard was that? It was hard but I had to do it for his good and mine. It needed to be said, so much we kept silent, I have had enough, he needs to know how I feel, I just cant tell him face to face, and I suppose that this letter is a cowards way out, but I was never the brave one or the confrontational one, he had those markets cornered, but I didn't want the pain that this caused me to continue because if it did I would be on a downward spiral, and frankly I was not prepared to deal with that, so I had to this for my sake. At least now we can stop pretending, we can stop with the fake smiles we can stop with the act, I wanted to be free of what he was for so long, this burden that this was the way it had to be. It never had to be that way it could have ended with this so long ago. Why the charade that it could continue when it couldn't. I left the letter in a pink envelop knowing he would know who it was from, it was the thought that I had to leave that scared me more than life its self, but Rory needed better than this and I had to give her that, it was my duty as a mother.
Lorelai packed their bags up and put them in the car, she had rented for the trip to Stars hollow she had been planning this for weeks, she knew that it was coming but she decided that tonight would be the night, Chris was coming back tomorrow from some business trip she haldnt cared to ask when he told her he was leaving for a month. It wasn't important she knew it wasn't a business trip, even though she wanted to believe that more than anything. Was Rory in on this little scheme of theirs, yes she was, she was happy her mother had finally taken action she had been begging her mother for so long, she had been begging for longer than she cared to remember, where were they headed? They were headed back to stars hollow where Rory had grown up and spent her days until she was sixteen and her mother had rekindled her relationship with her dad, Chris, and it was great at the begging, so why were they leaving now? Why were they packing up the jeep they rented in the dead silent of the night, so no one would know where they were headed? Because her father turned out to be the biggest conniving jerk and loser of all time, he cheated on her mother constantly and he drank, and in turn constantly abused her, and she was almost target for one of rages when her mother stood in front of her and protected her. But that was all ending now.
They piled into the jeep ready to go.
"well this is it ready Ror, you ready to say good bye?" asked Lorelai, in a voice that could only mean one thing fear.
"yes, I am ready I have been ready for a long time, mom don't worry he wont try, he will leave us alone, he will, you know how much he hated it when he last ran into Luke he wouldn't do it again, you and I both know, Luke is the one person Dad is scared of" Rory said squeezing her moms hand and giving her a reassuring smile. She then reached for the radio and pumped until the day I die and her mom pressed the gas pedal and they were off, to another begging, one that didn't include abuse and hate.
