The Special Someone

"Never in a million years would I understand such a concept," I beamed.

Castiel grinned, "Is that so?"

"The concept that I could fall in love with a human! Never in a million years!"

"When we were in the garrison I could not say such a thing!"

"Today, however, Castiel I can proudly proclaim that I am in love!"

Castiel with his thin pink lips gave me a smile. His face was covered in stubble and scars, but his smile only hid those imperfections. His icy blue eyes beamed happiness like a beacon. His messy short black hair was ruffled like his wings.

There was nothing quite like the happiness I felt. The happiness towards an individual who I was proud to call my special someone. Though, we were not together by any means. We were two separate people, but we both shared the same feelings.

I relaxed into the bed where Castiel and I sat. The bed was in my bedroom that was painted mossy green. My bedroom was not large, but it was not small. It was a good size where I could have a dresser, my bed, a desk, a couch, and a small piano.

My room was one of many bedrooms in the bunker where we lived. Castiel, Sam, Dean, and I lived in this bunker as we saved the world from evils. This supernaturally warded bunker was not always a perfect home, but it was a home. It was where I lived with the people I love. No matter how many pipes burst, fires, murders, and imperfections I loved it here.

Castiel and I were angels who once served alongside the other angels. Angels did not show emotions. We were trained to be mighty warriors who were fierce. Now, we were fallen angels who worked with men. We were no longer slaves to the training that Heaven gave us. We were now emotional fallen angel who no longer called Heaven home.

This emotion I had was that of love. I was in love with a human who was considered a sinner. I know this was seen as a disgrace by the laws of Heaven and was cast out for such a reason. I know it was seen as an action against Heaven. I had, however, been given a blessing by God, and he permits such a relationship.

There at that moment, I felt the change in the angle of me. I had become something different that God created me to be. He had granted me such emotions, and maybe this was some of them taking a deeper effect on me. In Heaven, I had two jobs given to me by God. One was to be a warrior or a guardian for him. The other was a cartographer for Heaven, Hell, and Earth. Both were decent jobs, but I enjoyed being the cartographer on Earth. There was so much to map out of this giant planet.

I had not been on Earth for that long. Maybe a few years at the most. I would be back up in Heaven soon. I just knew it! I missed the golden city with the billions of rooms with different names on each door. The billions of humans and creatures that lived in the perfect paradise hand crafted by God himself. I missed him too, and I wish I could see him again.

"You love him don't you," Castiel asked.

I stood up from the bed gleaming with joy as I glided over the floor. No matter the wings on my back I soared about the room in dancing motions. It was a great emotion to feel, and I wish I could feel this way more often. It was an emotion that I enjoyed the feeling. My heart fluttered like a thousand butterflies swarming to the sky. I thank my father God for the creation of this emotion.

On my desk, I looked at the picture of the man and me. It was taken a place called the Cuyahoga Valley National Park. I picked up the golden metal frame to gaze upon his face. There were imperfections, but I saw them as perfections. He was perfect in every way, and his smile was white and purely.

I liked my men how I liked my books. Worn, tattered, and weather downed. It showed a character that you could not get with a fresh book or man. It showed it had been used extensively, but it would still share the same story no matter how damaged. People had cast him out like an old book, but there was a human saying that I like. One man's trash is another man's treasure. He was my treasure who I loved dearly.

"Oh, I do! His soul is so captivating!"

Castiel nodded, "It is."

"The stature of him is that of a man who is powerful," I adored. "He is not afraid of anyone or anything."

Castiel sat on the bed watching me and my movement. He shook his head at a thought that popped into his head. I moved towards him slowly in fear of what he had to say.

Castiel then asked me, "What will you do if he loves you too?"

I laughed, "We would love each other! What do you mean Castiel."

"Phoebe, we do not see the true face of humans."

"I know," I interrupted.

"We only see their souls. You know he is damaged."

"Each scar is a story of his to tell," I replied.

When I had first met him and his brother I saw both of their faces. I saw hints of their soul, but I mainly saw their faces. Both brothers had strong facial features, bodies, and they both had kind loving souls.

I did not see a major issue with my special someone. As long as his heart was good what did it matter what he looked like? He could be the most unappealing person on the planet and I would still love him.

Castiel shook his head at me. Was there something else that he was trying to tell me? Was there a finer detail that I had missed? I took a seat again on the bed next to him. I looked in the eyes. His angel eyes were magnificent no matter the emotion they showed.

I had seen Castiel's vessel too, and his vessel had been through a lot. He had nice blue eyes with thick dark hair. The look suited Castiel, but despite his grace, he was a little bit on the shorter side. Which was not an issue for him at all, but it gave him more a reason to fight.

Once I got my grace back all I could see was their souls and grace, but that did not mean I didn't stop picturing their faces. I was always trying to picture their eyes. The eyes of Sam were like melting chocolate. Dean's eyes were green like a perfect granny smith apple. Castiel's eyes were as blue as his angel grace.

He faintly smiled at me, "Yes, but each scar holds darkness."

"I know he has been to Hell and back, but why does that matter?"

Castiel sighed, "I need you to be careful. I trust him, but I need you to promise me you will be careful."

"I will, Castiel." I put my hands on him, "I promise to be careful."

"Good," Castiel smiled. "How did you two meet? I never officially got to hear how."

I turned to him in shock. How had he not heard the story of how I met him? How have I managed to not tell him? How has Sam and Dean not told him how we met? I could have sworn I had told Castiel how we met. Had I forgotten to tell him?

"I never told you," I asked curiously.

"No," Castiel stated. "Sam and Dean gave me their own versions of it."

"Let me guess," I laughed, "Sam told a more believable story and Dean told a dramatic version of it."

"Correct."

I laughed as I rolled my eyes, "That is typical of a Winchester."

Castiel laughed at my joke, and we both sat there on my bed in a moment of silence. There in that short moment of silence, I saw his face in my memories. The face of his soul and the face of his physical being. The soul that had been to Hell and back. The soul that showed compassion and no compassion all at once.

He was a man who had become calloused to the supernatural elements of life. No man should ever become as calloused to them as he was, and that includes his brother. All because Eve ate that apple, Cain killed Abel, and many other sinful human decisions lead to their lives. The way they both were forced to be raised in a rough environment.

It was his laugh and smile that made me happy. His pain and anxiety made me sad. My emotions mirrored his perfectly. Where ever he would go I would go. Whatever he was to do I was to do. I wanted to be there for him like he was there for me.

I began, "I met him only a few years ago."

I remembered the last day in heaven before I fell. The day before my world changed forever. The day before I became a fallen angel. The angel who was cast out of heaven. There was a sting in that. All I had ever done was serve God right, but I was falling.

The feeling of falling is one that I can not quite describe. Everything slows around you as you fall. It is as if you become aware and are anticipating death. You wait for him, but in reality, he is welcoming you into his arms. You are suspended in the air with nothing around you. Suspended and perfect till everything hits the ground.

There I laid on the ground. Broken and unable to move around. Any movement made my body send waves of pain across it. Pain that my mind had never been able to comprehend until now. Pain that no one should ever have to feel.

My very own flesh was covered in dark crimson blood as well as thick brown mud. I was no longer perfect as I once was. I was no longer a perfect thing in the mind of God. I was a sinful, furthermore, broken creation of his. I knew, in the end, he would still love me, but this was not how I envisioned my life.

My bones were screaming as they formed new formations that they were not supposed to have formed. Though, as I laid there waiting for death they slowly healed. As if a part of my angelic grace was still with me.

My lungs gasping to get air, and my heart beating loudly. It was its own horrific symphony in which I had to endure its agony. The lungs wanted to rush fast so they could get air, but in reality, that was not what they needed. My lungs needed to slow down. My heart wanted to race to the end of the song, but my song was not over. My vibrantly created song was not to be over for a very long time.

The world became a blurred view to me.

There above me was the void of the sky. An endless black void with a billion pin pricked sparkling stars. There was a faint shooting star barrel towards me. That, however, was not a star that was falling from the sky. That was my angelic grace as it made its very own descent from heaven. It was what made me Phoebe the angel. For now, I was a broken human. Too fragile to live. Too close to death as he called me out by name.

The moments after that were spent in darkness as my new soul explored the broken body in which I resided. The human vessel that I have been using for over a hundred years was intact minus the broken limbs and injuries. The soul of its owner-Angelica Pierce-was not here. She died in the fall, but I kept her vessel. It was now mine. I began to prognosticate that she was in heaven with her husband and son.

I heard the shouts of men through the darkness that swarmed me. Shouts to ask if I was okay and if I needed assistance. I could not move my body as I fell further into the darkness. I could hear the shouts of two different men, but I had no idea who they were. I knew they were definitely human men in their late twenties or early thirties. I could not see their soul, but the warmth of it told me they were good people. In that instant I let my natural instinct go, and allowed them to help me. Yet, that was not an easy task as I heard Death call my name.

"Phoebe. Let go, and come to me child," Death called.

The darkness was welcoming me unlike the light had. It took over me almost completely. I was straining further and further into the sinful ways of man. I was becoming more human than angel. Descending into the darkness was all I could do.

"Hey, I need you to hear me if you are still with me. Keep fighting for me. Keep fighting for life, please. I can help you, but you got to hang on for me. Can you do that?"

"Okay," I whispered softly as I rested in his arms.