TwiGirlsNextDoor Christmas Crackers
Pairing: Edward/Bella
Title: Stormy Revelations
Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight or its Characters; they belong to Stephanie Meyer. I also don't own nor am I affiliated with the University of Washington or Betts, Patterson, and Mines in anyway.
Brief Summary: Bella's year of confusion and struggle only gets worse when she makes a shocking discovery on New Year's Eve. Can a new friend make her see the light at the end of the storm? (M Rating)
December 31, 2010
Well, this isn't how I imagined I'd be spending New Year's Eve. Sitting in a tiny cafe, fully decked out in my fanciest dress, while feeling like I had absolutely hit rock bottom.
Hell, if I was being honest with myself, the months leading up to this weren't exactly how I'd imagined life after college, either.
Things had been so simple last year. After I graduated with my Bachelors degree in Pre-Law from the University of Washington in May 2010, I was already on the road to fulfilling my career goals. I was accepted into Udub's School of Law, and I was interning at Betts, Patterson, and Mines, in the corporate law department.
Even though law school didn't start until the fall, I'd been accepted to start during the summer, and when it came time to start classes, I felt like I had gained a breadth of knowledge and experience that would serve me well in my program.
I was wrong.
It wasn't that I was incapable of keeping up with the work or that my experiences didn't add much needed context. It was more like that's all it was—keeping up and spouting off facts that I'd acquired. I didn't feel any passion about the subject matter I was pursuing. The further I got into my studies, I felt like there had to be something I could make a career out of that I loved versus what would make me money.
Even that train of thought alone was scary because being financially stable had always been my number one goal. I was raised in Forks, Washington by my Police Chief father, who not only had to fill the role of both parents but also had to be the sole earner in the home. My mother left us when I was just five years old, and although we maintained some contact now that I was older, her dream-chasing ways didn't allow for much parental guidance. Not to mention she never offered to help my father with any of the financial aspects of raising me.
Although my father provided for us the best he could and I was never hungry or without things I needed, I know that we always just "got by." There were never any vacations or things of that nature because we simply couldn't afford it. While I knew I didn't need those things to be happy, financial stability was always something I wanted to be able to provide for myself and my father.
So it was with that focus that I decided to be an attorney and specialize in corporate law, because I knew I could make a lot of money in the field, and I'd always enjoyed the ins and outs of the legal system.
But having it as the sole focus of my life began to take a toll, especially when my heart wasn't in it. My performance at work started to suffer, and my mood became increasingly low. I finally decided I needed to make a change.
The only problem was I didn't know exactly what that change should be. So I did the only thing I had any immediate control over: I withdrew from the program. I just knew it wasn't for me, and I knew it was time to figure out what was.
My dropping out had repercussions, though. Because I dropped out of the program, I was no longer able to maintain my intern position at the firm, which not only looked bad on my resume but left me without the generous stipend – combined with a few surplus funds through student loans – I'd been living off of. Because I was determined to remain self-sufficient and refused to burden my father, I picked up a job as a waitress at a local cafe while I tried to figure it all out.
To make matters worse, dropping out took a toll on my personal life as well. Ever since the second semester of my senior year in undergrad, I'd been dating Riley Patterson, heir to the Betts, Patterson, and Mines empire. He was also a senior and attending law school at Udub. We met during a study group, and after everyone left, we continued to sit around and talk—and that was that. He was handsome and suave, and he carried himself in a way that spoke of his confidence and potential for success. He was also my first real boyfriend, and to say I had stars in my eyes would be an understatement.
Even though he was also just an intern, everyone knew that between nepotism and Riley's ability to persuade, he would be climbing the corporate ladder quickly. So to say he was disappointed in my decision not to climb it with him would be putting it mildly.
"What? Are you insane, Bella? How could you throw this all away?" he shouted after I told him of my decision to drop out of school and, in effect, end my internship. We were eating the dinner I'd prepared in the apartment we'd shared since graduation—a gift from his parents.
"Riley, you know how down I've been lately. You even said yourself I haven't been myself and need to get out of this funk. Well, this funk will continue if I keep going down this road. I have to do what I think is best for me." I knew this discussion would be hard given his personal affiliation with the company, but I was hoping he'd understand and be supportive.
Not likely.
"Bella, that makes no sense! Since the day I met you, law school and being an attorney has been the goal. We made plans, and we have obligations to each other to see them through. How can you just dump this all on me and expect it to be okay?"
I just stared at him with a mix of hurt, anger, and disbelief. I couldn't believe he'd found some way to turn this around and make it about him. I knew I was taking a huge risk, and on some level I understood how it could impact him, but this was harder on me than anyone. He didn't see that. He didn't care to.
"Well I'm sorry this will make you look bad at the water cooler, but this is what I need to do for me. As my boyfriend, I thought you'd be on my side. I just. . . I need you to be on my side," I choked out as all the emotions started to overwhelm me. Although I knew this was the right choice for me, I was afraid, and I needed comfort, not ridicule.
"I'm sorry that I've wasted my time thinking about the big picture while you make decisions on a whim that just undermines everything," he stated bluntly before storming out of the front door.
Although we both apologized for getting so angry, he never apologized for the things he'd said, nor did he offer me any comfort on the matter. This noticeably cooled down our relationship, and when we got closer to the holidays, I decided I would go home alone to visit my dad. That decision started another argument because I didn't plan to return until after the New Year, and Riley's parents always threw a grand New Year's Eve party. He felt that my absence would further the strain in his professional and personal life.
Spending Christmas with my dad was the most content I'd been in months. He didn't give me advice on my situation because that wasn't his way, but he made it clear he would support any decision I made. Feeling a little rejuvenated, I decided to surprise Riley and come home early so I could attend the party with him. I felt like my relationship was the one thing I might still be able to salvage, so I was willing to try.
But it turns out Riley had a surprise for me all of his own.
I hurried up the steps as quickly as possible, equal parts excited and nervous to surprise Riley. I'd decided to attend the party early in the afternoon, so I arrived already dressed, knowing that the time it took me to drive from Forks to Seattle wouldn't leave me a chance to do so when I arrived.
When I opened the apartment door, it took me a moment to realize what I was seeing. It was like my eyes could perceive the image of my boyfriend of almost two years going down on some blonde in my living room, but my brain needed time to catch up. As soon as it did, however, I was enraged.
"What the FUCK is going on here?" I screamed. I'd never been so angry and humiliated in my life. They immediately pulled apart, and it was then I recognized the blonde as Bree, another intern at the firm. She'd always come across as quite cold and emotionless to me, but I guess those things weren't necessary to get off.
"Oh, shit! Bella, what are you doing here?" Riley had the nerve to stutter out as he attempted to right his clothing. Bree, meanwhile, was pulling her dress down and sitting awkwardly on the couch—the couch on which my boyfriend was just servicing her.
"Well, I thought that since things had been so strained between us, I'd come home to surprise you so we could go to the party together. I wanted to do something to make you happy. Seems you're getting that other places these days, though, huh?"
"Look, Bella, you've been really distant lately, and you know how I feel about the choices you've made recently…"
I didn't want to hear any more. I refused to stand here and allow him to justify this.
"You know what? Save it. We're done." I said with as much confidence and passion I could manage as I was slowly shattering inside.
I didn't say anything else as I grabbed my purse and left the apartment.
By the time I made it back outside, it was pouring down raining and the tell-tale signs of thunder and lightning had begun. I hopped in my car, and for a minute I just sat there and let tears run down my face as rain drops mimicked the action on my windshield. I had so many thoughts going through my mind that it was hard to even discern one from the other. I just knew I had to get out of there.
I drove to the cafe where I worked, even though I was off since I wasn't even expected back home. After tonight it was the only place in Seattle for me to go. I had no place else.
So, that's how I ended up here. With a large mug of hot white chocolate in front of me as I sat at the counter listening to Christmas songs. Since the café was close to campus, it stayed open relatively late, and tonight was no exception. Although the place was pretty much empty in terms of sit-in customers, the atmosphere was welcoming and activity on the streets allowed for a steady flow of take-out orders.
When I arrived, my co-worker, Alice, began to excitedly talk my ear off—as was her way—until she saw the state I was in. One look at me and she smiled sympathetically, placed my drink down, and just let me stew. For as exuberant and excitable as Alice usually was, the months of working together had made us pretty close, so she knew when I just needed to be left alone.
"Bells! What are you doing here? I thought you were staying at home for another day?" I heard a voice call out behind me. When I turned, I saw my boss, Emmett, enter the café with an attractive man trailing behind him. If I wasn't so down in the dumps, I might've paid more attention to this mystery man. Instead, I just looked at Emmett and said, "Yeah. I decided to come home early. Thought I'd surprise Riley."
Emmett snorted at my statement and shook his head but didn't say another word. Ever since I started working here, Emmett has acted like a brother to me. He was such an open and warm person, it was easy for me to grow close to him, so I accepted him in that role gladly. And ever since then he made it clear Riley was not one of his favorite people, but out of respect for me, he tried to keep his opinions to himself.
Alice, however, decided she'd suffered enough suspense. "Bella, if you came home to surprise Riley, why are you here and not at that fancy party he tried to guilt trip you into?"
I don't know if it was exhaustion that made me spill my guts, or the fact I felt comfortable with Alice and Emmett, but either way I said, "Well, when I came home I found Riley screwing some blonde from the office on the couch. Kind of ruined the party mood."
After a beat of silence, during which Alice's face showed shock and Emmett's rage, they both burst out into chatter: Alice asking me if I was okay and if there was anything she could do and Emmett threatening to mess him up beyond recognition.
Although I appreciated the range of sentiments, Riley was actually the last thing I wanted to talk about when this was just the cherry on top of my already crappy life sundae. As I looked up to my side to get my thoughts together, I was immediately met by mossy green eyes that, surprisingly, showed curiosity. I'd almost forgotten the man who'd walked in with Emmett, but now that he was sitting so close to me, it was hard to ignore him. His hair was a reddish-brown color and styled in a way that made it impossible to tell whether he put time into it, or woke up that way. His eyes were such a clear and sparkling color they almost seemed unreal. His face was angular and masculine, yet his lips had a slight pout and looked quite soft. He was simply beautiful.
I startled as I had that thought and realized I was practically coveting another man not even an hour after finding my boyfriend cheating on me. Emmett must've noticed my stare, though, because he introduced us. "Oh, I'm sorry. Alice, Bella, this is my brother-in-law, Edward. Edward, this is Alice, and this is Bella," he stated as he gestured between the two of us. I knew that Emmett was an only child, so Edward must've been his wife Rosalie's brother. Alice and I both said hi to him, and it could've been my imagination, but when he said, "It's nice to meet you both," I swear he was looking solely at me.
After the introductions, Alice and Emmett asked me exactly what had gone down, so I told them. They already knew everything surrounding my departure from school, so they knew how strained things had been between us. After relaying the entire story, I was just sick of talking about him, so I politely excused myself from the conversation, picked up my mug, and went to sit on one of the couches near the window.
After sitting there for a while staring aimlessly outside the window, I felt a presence next to me. I looked up and was met with the same green eyes that had entranced me earlier.
"Hey, would you mind if I sit with you?" he asked.
Although I knew I should've said no, I didn't. Instead, I moved over to allow him more space on the couch.
We sat in silence for a while, listening to the music, but I felt as if I was being watched. When I looked over, sure enough, he was staring at me curiously and searchingly.
"What?" I asked. Part of me wanted to say it was rude to stare, but another part of me wanted to know what he was looking for in me—or what he thought he saw.
"Sorry, I don't mean to be rude. I'm a counselor, so observation is a part of my job; sometimes I do it outside of the office, though."
"Well, what exactly has you so intrigued?" I asked, turning my body towards him.
"Don't get me wrong, the story you told about your boyfriend was horrible, and I'm sorry you experienced that, but it almost seems like there's more to it. Like, you were almost resolved to the fact it happened, you know?"
Yeah, I did know, but I hadn't expected him to be so open about it. "You know, I thought counselors were supposed to be less forward when making assertions than this."
He laughed heartily and then smirked down at me. "Yeah, well, I like to be more direct."
Even though I laughed at his joke, I was still resistant to spill my guts. "I just met you; why should I tell you all my problems?"
His answer was surprisingly honest and took me by surprise in its simplicity. "Because I'm willing to listen, no matter what you have to say."
And even though I didn't know him and it was all still so fresh, it was exactly what I needed to hear. So I told him everything that led up to tonight, including my confusion and uncertainty about my future. True to his word, he listened intently, without judgment or inserting his own ideas. Even when he started questioning me, it was always about what I wanted and what I thought.
"I don't know; I guess I was attracted to law because I liked the idea of giving a voice to someone when they can't, and the idea of justice," I answered when Edward asked me what attracted me to law in the first place.
"Well, to me it sounds like you can find a number of different things to fulfill that love. You don't have to be a lawyer to help people who've been wronged."
He was right, of course, but hearing it in the context of our conversation made me realize that maybe things weren't as bleak as I'd initially thought when it came to my options.
We talked for hours after that, and it was only when Alice started a New Year's Eve countdown and Auld Lang Syne began that we separated from one another. But I knew that the events of the night would impact me and my decisions in the New Year.
December 31, 2011
I'd like to say that after that night everything just got instantly better, but that wouldn't be the truth, and it wouldn't be life. After that night, I went home with Alice, who so generously offered to let me live with her until I figured things out. I cried my eyes out the next day and ate an entire tub of ice cream, but once I was finished licking my wounds, I thought about what Edward said and realized he was right; I needed to start taking back some control so I could find my happiness my way.
The first order of business was returning to the apartment and purging myself of Riley. I will admit I was a coward in that sense because I went with Alice and Emmett during a time I knew he wouldn't be there and packed up everything last thing I owned. I left him a note telling him I wouldn't be returning, and that was that. It didn't escape my notice that I didn't hear from him after my departure from the apartment, so I figured this would be all the closure I'd get, and I'd have to be okay with that.
After I told my dad what happened, he tried to talk me into moving back home, but I felt like I needed to start fresh here. Besides, Alice was actually a really great roommate, and living together had made us closer. I was never one for having really close friends, but Alice and I had become best friends.
Edward started to come into the café more, and a friendship blossomed there as well. When I decided to take his advice and volunteer at a few advocacy organizations, he was more than supportive. He used the contacts he had to find me a few different options, and come late spring, I was volunteering at a center that helped formerly battered women and their children get back on their feet after leaving abusive homes. Some of the stories were rough, and the work was not easy; it took a lot of time, patience, and perseverance, but I loved it. I finally felt like I was using my knowledge and interest in the inner workings of the legal system to help people find their voice.
After a few months of volunteering, I decided it was time to head back to school, but this time I would do something I loved. I was accepted into the Masters program for Non-Profit Organizations with a concentration in law and ethics. The moment I sat down for my first in-class lecture, I knew that was the right decision. I felt like I was working towards something I cared about currently, and not just looking for the ends to justify the means. I finally felt like I was where I should be.
Once I was in the program, the center upgraded my status from volunteer to intern, and I was once again granted a stipend. Since my commitment was more permanent and my hours were longer, I had to quit my job at the café, but that didn't stop me from frequenting it as often as before.
Most days, Edward went with me, and friendship slowly bloomed into something else. Although I'd found some closure with the Riley situation, I'd still had some self-esteem issues from being cheated on. Edward was patient, though; he understood my reservations and the need I felt to just be Bella for a time. But as soon as I felt comfortable, he made it clear what he wanted, and what he wanted was me.
See you in ten minutes; be ready with my coffee, loser!
I smiled down at the text message I'd just received from Edward and shook my head slowly. Early on in our friendship we discovered we were both addicted to Words with Friends and quickly started to challenge one another. Now after every game the loser had to purchase the winner coffee. I'll admit that most times I was the one buying, but it was only because of all those books he read for his major. Although Edward was a guidance counselor in a high school, he was also taking classes to get his Masters in Community Counseling, specifically working with families and couples.
"Edward must be on his way," Alice said in a sing-song voice that snapped me out of my thoughts.
"Why do you say that?"
"Because only Edward can make you smile like that," Alice replied with a smirk that turned into a full out grin as I rolled my eyes at her comment. "Oh, come on, Bella! Admit it! You and Edward have chemistry that far exceeds the 'friend zone.'"
Alice had been saying things like this for weeks now, and I'd been trying my best to refute such claims. However, the truth is I had started to feel something more for Edward. From the day we met I'd been attracted to him, but with everything that had just happened with Riley, I couldn't even focus on those feelings. Even though I had gotten my life together and was over Riley, I still couldn't bring myself to fully believe Edward and I could be more; it just seemed too good to be true.
Before I could reply to Alice, I heard his voice behind me. "Hey, ladies. What are you two looking so intense about?" Edward asked as he slid onto the stool beside me. As I looked up to greet him, I couldn't deny the way my heart beat just a little faster, and my lips automatically formed a smile whenever I saw him.
"Oh, nothing. I was just telling Bella a little bit about chemistry, but maybe you can take over?" Alice finished with a wink, as she went on to serve other customers.
Edward was clearly confused by her statement, but he didn't question me further, thank goodness.
"Hey, how was your day?" I asked him as I went behind the counter to make his reward drink. Even though I didn't work here anymore, Emmett made it clear that this place was still like home to me.
"It was pretty good. I finally got the funding for the Grief and Loss group I want to start at the school, so I'm pretty excited about that."
"Edward, that's amazing! I'm really happy for you." He'd been trying to start that group for ages, and I knew how much it meant to him. Edward told me how hard it was for him and Rosalie when their grandmother died while they were in high school, so I knew this was a big accomplishment for him.
"Thanks, B. That means a lot to me. I was actually hoping you'd help me celebrate this weekend," he said somewhat hesitantly as I handed his drink over.
"Sure; I'd love to," I replied, a little confused by his change in demeanor. "What did you have in mind?"
"Well, I was hoping you'd agree to go out with me to dinner," he asked with hope shining in his eyes.
"Why are you being so weird? Of course I'll have dinner with you; we ate together two nights ago," I said, really confused with why he had to ask me that. We ate meals together all the time; mostly with Emmett, Rose, Alice, and Alice's boyfriend, Jasper, but sometimes alone. It wasn't anything new.
He took a deep breath before saying, "No, Bella. I want us to go out to dinner. Like, on a date. I'm asking you to go out on a date with me."
If it wasn't for the fact that I was truly shocked by his request, I might have laughed at how nervous Edward seemed to be to ask me out.
Could this really be happening? Edward wanted to go on a date with me?
I could fess up to Alice being right about my growing feelings for Edward, but I never allowed myself to wonder if his feelings were evolving as well. He'd been such a great friend to me, but maybe I was ignoring that he was also a man.
I realized that I had been quiet for far too long, and when I looked into Edward's eyes, he seemed to be bracing himself for defeat.
"Edward, I'm so flattered that you want to go out with me, but with everything that I have going on…"
"Bella, stop it," he interrupted me, with a fierce look in his eyes that halted any further comments from me.
"Look, I know you've been through a lot, but you have to stop looking backwards and start looking forward." Edward's eyes began to soften. He took my hands in his and continued, "I'm so happy to have met you and have you as a friend, but I think it's time that I'm honest and say I'd like to see if we can be more. Now, if you don't want to be with me, that's fine, but don't let Riley or school or anything else stop you if this is what you want."
Once again, he was right. I had to stop using the past few months as a crutch. Everything else in my life was moving forward; why not allow my heart to as well?
So I did the thing that I've wanted to do since he asked me out to dinner.
I said yes.
Dating led to exclusivity, which led to intimacy and commitment. I finally felt what it was like to have a friend, partner, and supporter in a lover and boyfriend, and in return, I was able to provide the same just as whole-heartedly. I'll never forget the first time Edward and I gave ourselves to one another fully, in every way.
We were sitting on his living room floor, eating pizza and watching What Not to Wear. I was absolutely obsessed with the show. And although Edward watched it begrudging, he was willing to make the concession since I watched football with him on Sundays and Mondays. I was, however, sworn to secrecy about the fact that he watches the TLC channel at all with me.
We'd been together for about 3 months, and I couldn't believe how indescribably happy Edward had made me during that time.
Transitioning from friends to being a couple was slow but easy. We didn't want to rush things or try to analyze them too much; we just were. And it was great.
I realized that the person you're in a relationship with should be your friend, and I didn't have that before. We supported one another completely, but we were also honest and challenged each other when necessary. We laughed as much as we kissed, and we played around as much as we fooled around. I had it all with Edward.
"Admit it, Edward. You like this show. I bet you want a tie just like Clinton's," I finished, barely able to contain my laugh because of the expression on Edward's face. He'd actually been complaining the whole show that he didn't understand wearing a striped shirt with a polka dot tie.
"Umm, no. And if you ever get me a tie like that, I'd have to rethink our relationship."
I couldn't help but laugh at his solemn tone. "Whatever; you'd love it if I bought you a polka dot tie. In fact, a polka dot bow tie is going to be my Christmas present to you!"
We both laughed at that visual, especially since Clinton was now on the screen wearing a bow tie.
"You know, for you, I'd wear it," he said as his laughing calmed down and he pulled me closer.
"Oh, yeah? Why would you do that if you hate it so much?"
"Because I may hate the tie, but I love you," he said, right before placing a soft kiss on my lips as I sank even further into his embrace.
We'd recently exchanged those three words to each other, so hearing them still turned me into a pile of goo. So far, Edward and I had expressed ourselves in every way possible, except physically.
There was no real reason for the wait; we just wanted it to be like every other aspect of our relationship and happen naturally.
But by the look in Edward's eyes as he leaned down to kiss me again, I had a feeling the time was upon us.
Ever since I'd first kissed Edward, his lips had the ability to completely immobilize me. He was always so gentle and slow, yet sensual and passionate; it was like time didn't exist and all that mattered was what he could convey to me in that moment.
As our kisses grew more heated, I turned around and sat in his lap, feeling the warmth and hardness of his chest pressed against the suppleness of my own. His thick, muscular thighs seated under my own which were soft and pliable under his fingers as he caressed me there.
Soft kisses turned more passionate as soft sighs turned to yearning moans. My body ached for him, my heart and soul ready for this last form of connection and communication we could provide one another.
I broke the kiss long enough to stand up and reach for his hand. Edward seemed to need and want this as much as I did, because he grasped my hand in his and led me to his bedroom.
As soon as the door closed, clothing was shed. My hands unbuttoned rough denim and pulled at long sleeves; his hands removed cotton to unsnap and tug at lace. And once all the barriers were removed, we wrapped ourselves up in each other.
Soon it was hard to tell where he began and I ended, and when hard, taught skin slid into warmth and wetness, I knew that there was no better feeling than being completely one with this man.
I know it seems cliché to say, but after that day, I finally allowed myself to fully live and rid myself of the hardships of my past.
So, as I sit here at the café with Edward on the same couch as last year, listening to the countdown, I'm amazed at what a year it's been. I've found friends who are like family, a profession that makes me proud and excited to be a part of it, and a love that makes me feel weightless.
As the new year breaks, Auld Lang Syne flows through the speakers, and celebration ensues, I kiss the man sitting next to me with everything I have in me, and with a promise for everything to come.
Once our lips part, he smiles down at me with a look that's become all mine and says, "Happy New Year, baby".
Happy New Year indeed.
