Disclaimer: I don't own Gravi and I am making no money... Oo...
Minor spoilers and shounen-ai ahead.
"Listen"
By Chiisuchina Yagami
I remember so long ago, smiling that fond smile, gazing upon the one I loved and telling him just so. I remember vividly one day, how I played in the cold like I was a small child again. How my eyes had lit up when I had spotted some new and anticipated book in the window of a random American bookstore. I don't remember the title. He bought it for me, just to see my face come to life with joy. For that small moment in time, I was happy. We were happy. Still, I couldn't shake the fact that his eyes were on me, always watching me. It made me nervous, but anxious in a good way. I would bring the book up to my mouth and grin as a blush crept up my cheeks. We walked home, laughing and talking. Our world was nearly perfect, me and my Yuki.
During those cold winter days, I'd read by the radio, listening to classical music. I enjoyed just sitting there and experiencing the soul of the sounds overcome me, again feeling my childhood. It was a good time of year for me. The cold was refreshing, somehow. It always got me excited and it made me feel new. I could leave the atrocities of Japan behind. I could forget myself, lose my identity.
Nowadays, I hate the winter. It puts me in bad humor. And so it seems, those around me feel my attitude. Some of them I feel a bit worse about hurting more than others. When the winter rolls around, I feel remorse drip from my being. My heart starts to ache and my head spins. It's like a feeling that eternally clings to me. No matter who I have now, it keeps hurting. The pain never becomes numb.
And then I look at your face, the one who I love, and I'm home again. Not in New York, in Japan. I'm warm with you as we lay here in my bed, our bed, the covers around our waists, drawing themselves up by your sleeping head. I'm listening to the winter showers that will bring the cold and perhaps snow. Near silence is here with us, but it's all I need.
Though your eyes are closed in a listless slumber, I can see emotion crossing over them. Pure and simple, just like you, your feelings become apparent to me. I turn your small visage towards me, my forefinger and thumb hooked under your chin. My eyes linger on your cheeks, hot and blushing the faintest pink. Light breath passes your rose colored lips making my own turn upward in a faint smile. A tiny mumble emits from your mouth as you tangle my fingers with your own. Without much more ability to resist your vivid beauty, I gently push back your wine colored bangs and press a small kiss to your fevering forehead. I leave that hand nestled in your hair, the other still entwined with your lithe fingers, and lay my head to your chest, simply soaking it all in.
My own eyes dip shut then pull open again. For that moment, all I can feel is the heat radiating your fine skin and the beating of your heart. All I care to see is your chest rising and falling with each sweet breath. Occasionally, you cough softly. Enraptured I am, simply thinking about you, being with you.
Slowly your eyes open and your lips are slightly parted. I raise my head to meet your gaze. For a moment, you seem dazed, scared even. Then, you smile at me and sweep smooth golden hair from my eyes, removing the lock your gentle hand had on mine. Those azure eyes of yours implore me and search me. Although there are many profound differences between the two of us, you seem to understand and nod as such. My eyes dip again from their gaze, once, twice. Sleep has left me, near silence has surrounded us. Still the rain patters along the window panes, making itself quite known. Softly, a thunderclap rumbles in the distance.
"You're sick. Go back to sleep." I tell you.
"I don't mind. I'm just glad you're here." Your voice is so angelic when it's like this, like a precious seraph has graced me with his presence. Usually, you are a siren. "Yuki, do you love me?" So faint, it is a whisper, your question causes me to lift myself from our comfortable warmth. I look down at you, your half lidded eyes still agaze, my own optics blank. You know I do, nowadays at least. Why should I have to say anything?
"Why do you ask?" My hand cups your cheek and I lean over you. I know I'll get a cold, or the flu, or whatever you have, but I can't help kissing your soft lips again and again.
"I had a bad dream." You say softly. "I just need to know."
"...I don't hate you." I really just don't know how to word anything like that. I could say that I admire you, that want you to mean more to me than a simple 'click' in my head. Maybe I want to let you know that I finally am certain of what love is, now that I can be with you. Maybe I should say that you've rescued me from my demons. I choose to say nothing, however. Yet again, I deliver another brush of a kiss to your sweet little mouth.
Your lips part farther, allowing me to deepen the motion. Our tongues tangled for a moment, moving slow, invoking ecstasy within our hearts. My lips move from that divine confection of a mouth of yours and lightly sweep across your beautifully sculpted jaw. Hands run through your locks, cradling the back of your head. You smile at me then giggle, just like the little girly brat that you are and you touch a soft kiss to my cheek. I close my eyes just to savor the feeling as this small tingle travels to the pit of my stomach and back again.
Your eyes daintily close and your hand rests atop my head. Your other arm wraps around my back in an embrace. "Forget about it. It's okay." Your voice wasn't bitter. In fact, it sounds peaceful, happy even. I could feel your smile.
A whirlwind of complex emotions breathe over me. I want to pleasure you, hold you, cry with you, yell at you, shove you away, and at the same time, I simply want to love you. You are a complex person, despite your airheaded image. Even now, you continue to foster these emotions in me, carefully raising my awareness of others. My thoughts are clouded now.
I want to say it, really..."I don't think I could word it properly." I mumble quietly to myself. It's the truth, partially.
"What was that, Yuki?" You ask with a cough following promptly afterwards.
"Nothing."
I lay my head on your chest and my arms come to rest beside your svelte waist, slightly damp with the sweat of your fever. Though it is still early in the afternoon, the clouds that loom overhead bring with them a subtle darkness, one that drowns our home. The rain continues to pour. I gaze out the window of our bedroom taking in all these things one at a time. Cars occasionally pass by in the street, making noises nearly inaudible from where we lay. I see a mother rushing her daughter down the sidewalk, her red umbrella getting caught by the wind every now and then. Besides that, the street is silent.
You softly caress my hair, speaking quietly as you ruffle those fine golden strands of mine. your voice fills my ears, so soft, so sweet. Today, I love your voice. You tell me once more that you had a horrible dream, how it shocked you, pulled you awake, and again how you're so happy that I'm here.
"What happened in your dream?" I find myself asking lazily with a tiny yawn. You smile at me and again push back my bangs.
"I can't believe it." You say happily. "You care about my dream?"
"Of course I care." I relate quietly. "You're so damn loud with all that crap on your mind. I prefer you tell me once instead of brooding over it then whining about it later." You laugh softly. "Shut up." My voice remains dreary and unanimated.
"How can I tell you about my dream if I have to shut up?" You ask, a smile playing on your tired face. I look up at you, scowl, then put my head back down.
"Get on with it or shut up." I say softly, just to feel like things were back to normal and you weren't sick today. We might have been able to do something other than sleep all day otherwise.
"Okay." You grin. "Well, I was sitting in this bright room and you had left me. You said you'd be back soon and...everything just blacked out...and I..."
A pause.
"You..?"
"...forgot. I don't know what happened after that." Your hand creeps up to your pretty face as you try to recall. You look away for while, out the window where my own gaze had been and your other hand plays idly at the sheets. Silence befalls you. With this I simply stare sympathetically, soon pulling myself up to kiss your contemplative lips.
"I'm sorry, then." I tell him, my head hurting.
You forgive your 'forgetfulness' quite quickly and smile lightly. "Well, don't be. It was just a dream, silly."
I can't help but give a faint ghost of a grin, turning my head away so you can't see it. "Of course. Well, maybe if things had happened differently, you'd still be asleep, idiot. You need to be asleep... or at least drinking fluids and taking medicine instead of loitering in my sheets."
"In other words, You want me to feel better." You say with a grin.
And a quiet develops again. But that is okay. This calm is very soothing to my tired brain. You remain here beside me with your gingerly touches and wide, watchful eyes, and my subtle repose continues as well. Again my eyes close, this time shutting in hopes of sleep. My breathing becomes rhythmic and vapid. Only then do you crawl from beneath me, helping me turn to lay on my back and change our positions. You lean against my stomach and those rose colored lips press a soft kiss to my own. After a short pause, slight hands lay in mine. Your left cheek comes to rest on my right and gently into my ear you whisper, "I'm so happy you love me."
"Says who?" I wrap an arm around your naked waist and tighten the grip my hand had on yours.
You smile sweetly. "Says you." Tapping your finger on my nose with a playful, songlike tone of voice, you snuggle closer to me. "It wasn't hard to figure out."
A/N: Gawd... I wrote this soooo long ago it isn't even funny. I don't think it makes any sense, either...
Anywho... just to update all of you, I WILL be continuing Love Lemonade and the new chapter is nearly compleate. Sorry for the wait...
