Disclaimer: I wish.
A/N: This fic was in a response to a challenge to a) write a fic with a certain dialogue between two characters you wouldn't usually ship together, and b) have it end romantically (even if it ended up with the two of them running screaming from the room). Actually, I really like the ship Seamus/Alicia now. Hm.
"Seamus Kevin Finnigan!" Alicia Spinnet's screech echoed from her dormitory to the common room...and to the corridor outside. And the Quidditch pitch. And to Albus Dumbledore's office.
Seamus thought he was going to faint.
"I hate it when she uses my middle name," he croaked to Dean Thomas, sitting to his left. "Hide me."
"Why's she so mad at you this time?" Neville Longbottom laughed as Seamus attempted to hide under the small round table the three friends had been seated at.
"How am I supposed to know? That girl's mad, I swear! She starts these fights, not me."
The door to the seventh year girls' dorm was thrown open and a fiery blonde came storming out. Her short blonde hair flew around her head and into her face, getting caught in her mouth and obscuring her vision, and she was clutching something tightly in her hands. The fact that she was barely 5'4" was completely overshadowed by her anger. The common room was empty in an instant.
"Hey Seamus, we need to go to the—" Dean had begun to stammer out, but before he could finish, Neville had dragged him out the portrait hole to safety.
"Seamus!"
"Yes, we have already established that you are talking to me Alicia, what is it?" Seamus snapped as he stopped trying to hide and burst from under the table. Alicia stopped right in front of him and held up a book that appeared to be charred in some places, and water damaged in others. He couldn't even tell what the book had been in the first place, but he could tell what he was about to be accused of.
Though Seamus was quite positive he had never seen the book before in his life, he was seriously considering admitting he had ruined her book just to avoid a shouting match.
"What did you do to my Charms book!" she screeched. Seamus took a second to ponder how far he could get if he just threw the book and started running now.
"I didn't touch your Charms book! I can't even go into the girls' dorms, how could I have got to it?" Seamus countered angrily as he grabbed her damaged book and hurled it across the room. It smacked the wall above the fireplace and fell to the ground, the spine tearing upon impact. Unfortunately, that move had used up all his courage and he had lost the ability to run.
So much for avoiding a fight.
"Oh, I don't know, how about just last week over Christmas holiday when you and your mum were at my house? You're the only one who's even been near my stuff, and this certainly looks like your handiwork!"
Okay, he had to admit, she had a point there. He had a habit of, well, destroying stuff, and he wasn't very good at covering it up, but he could have sworn he didn't catch anything on fire over Christmas! Right?
"That doesn't mean I did it! Maybe it was your brother." He acted as if that solution was simple. Why hadn't she thought of it herself?
"My twenty-five year old brother who works for the Accidental Magical Reversal Squad? What would he be doing with a seventh year Advanced Charms book Seamus?" Alicia's face was growing very red and she looked as if she were going to start pulling her hair out at any moment. If she wasn't careful, she was going to look like a very large tomato.
"Well, if he's as smart as you, he must have thought it was your reading primer!" The minute the retort spilled from his lips, Seamus knew he regretted it. Mainly because Alicia had seized him by the front of his robes and looked as if she was going to punch him. "Whoa there, violence never solved anything!"
"Fuck you Seamus!" Alicia bellowed right in his face. Seamus couldn't help it. The comeback escaped his filter and was already out there before he even realized he had thought of it.
"It would probably improve your mood!"
"Are you volunteering?" Alicia barked with a little less sass than she obviously originally intended, judging by the shocked look on her face.
"...Okay, getting weird with the childhood friends here 'Licia!" Seamus laughed uncomfortably, throwing his hands up in a submissive fashion. Alicia let go of his collar instantly and pushed him back.
As Seamus fell onto the couch a few paces behind him, he watched his mother's best friend's daughter storm over to the fire to pick up her damaged book.
"I know you did this, all I need to do is prove it," she growled just as the portrait hole swung open.
"What do you mean I don't want to go in here?" Angelina Johnson could be heard asking the Fat Lady. "I-oh, Alicia!" she cried out, turning to look in the common room. "Oh no, you found your book, I'm so sorry! I lost mine and I needed to borrow yours, but, I, uh, the Charm I was practicing kind of, well, you know, backfired. I tried to put it out with water from my wand, but, oh Alicia I was so flustered, wine came out instead. Katie had to help me! Oh Merlin, I'm so sorry, I meant to tell you I really did!" Tears were starting to form in Angelina's wide, frantic eyes, but Alicia's face was visibly softening as she listened to her fellow Gryffindor Chaser's confession.
"It's okay Angelina! It's all right, I can just get another one from Flitwick. I'm his favorite student, remember?" she joked good-naturedly. Seamus sat back and watched the scene in awe. Was she bipolar?
"I knew you were mad," Seamus muttered under his breath. Alicia turned her head towards him and gave him a small, sarcastic scowl.
"Oh, no, I'll pay for it! I have to go get another one anyway if I can't find mine, I'll just get two!" Angelina spluttered as she looked from Seamus to Alicia, her eyebrows raised. "Well, um, I have to go to the library now," she continued, apparently desperate to get away from the scene of the crime. "See you later!"
Angelina practically ran across the Common Room and threw open the portrait hole. As the Fat Lady murmured, "I told you so!" Angelina closed the portrait, leaving Seamus and Alicia alone once more.
"Oh Merlin, I'm so sorry 'bout that Seamus," Alicia sighed ashamedly, plopping down on the couch next to her old friend.
"Told you I was innocent!" Seamus chuckled, throwing his hands up as if that would illustrate his point. Alicia just shook her head.
"Bloody Irish."
"Bloody Irish you say? Everyone talks about the hotheadedness of the Irish, but I say the English are just as bad, and you are the perfect example!" Alicia just laughed her simple, careless laugh.
"You're a good kid Seamus, don't ever change." And with that, Alicia leaned forward, placing her finger under Seamus chin. Her lips lightly brushed against his. "Give me a ring in about five years."
Without so much as another word, Alicia stood up, headed over to the portrait hole and hopped out, leaving Seamus with much to think about.
