All rights for characters related to The Outsiders belong to SE Hinton.
This is a companion piece to "A Shot For Vengeance".
Mrs. Sheldon
XXX
"Robert Sheldon, Sr., 49 years old, survived by his wife Maureen Sheldon. Predeceased by his son, Robert Sheldon, Jr. Service and interment in Harmony Edge cemetery on 21 May at 10:00."
It was a simple obituary, but in no way told the story of the man. The woman, Maureen, wondered who would even notice the three lines she had placed in the paper. In her opinion, he didn't even deserve that much, but she did it anyway.
He wasn't always the evil man he became. Of course, sitting here in their... now her kitchen, hunched over the table because her ribs were still sore, she remembered a better time. In front of her were two boxes filled with old photos. Most were of her with Bobby, when Bobby was a baby. He was such a happy baby, bubbly and adventurous. She loved to take him to their garden and show him the butterflies fluttering about. Then Robert would come home and play with his son for a while. Those were good days. They didn't last.
Then, little by little.... it happening so gradually that she didn't even notice it, the alcohol came back into their lives. She had made him stop drinking when she started dating him. He had been kicked out of the service for all kinds of trouble, and she'd made it clear it was her or the booze, and he chose her. He stayed sober until she started showing, making their adventures in bed less and less possible.
"I'll get my jollies either from the bottle or another woman, Maureen. Your choice." Those were his words to her one day, well into her second trimester of that accidental pregnancy. She was defeated. She loved him, and didn't want him to stray. So she consented to the liquor, hoping after the baby was born things could go back to the way they were. It was a nice hope, but not the reality. Bobby was born, the liquor stayed - although he drank it less. Then, when Bobby hit the terrible two's, the booze was consumed more frequently. In short time, it was the only beverage he wanted.
Then the beatings started. Arguments at first that escalated to screaming. Then he hit her. He was so sorry, and things calmed down. Later, he'd hit her again. And he was sorry... again. Somewhere along the way, he'd stopped saying the words that by then had become hollow. She found out that she was pregnant again, but his boot in her stomach ended that. She swallowed hard and fought off that memory. That was her breaking point. From then on, nothing he did to her mattered.
"Maureen, it's time to go, honey."
Her sister, Evelyn, was there. Evelyn didn't know of all the abuse, just that her sister and brother-in-law had a rocky marriage. No one knew of the abuse. She was rather surprised when the phone rang and it was the hospital in Tulsa asking if someone from the family could come sit with Maureen while she recovered. Evelyn was on a train that night, coming down from Cincinnati.
Maureen looked at her sister and nodded, getting up from the kitchen chair. She got her thin purse and walked outside into the bright sunlight. It was another beautiful day, but to her, she felt empty inside.
She had failed that boy. That lady cop had come to see her in the hospital and had asked for a statement, but Maureen didn't want to say anything. Everyone was dead anyway, what difference would it make what she said? Only when the cop said Ponyboy Curtis hadn't died, that he was in critical condition in Oklahoma City, and that his family at least deserved to know why - if he did die, what he would die for - did she open up.
In tears she revealed the truth, the years of abuse, the rapes, the beatings. The lady cop had seen all sorts of horrible things on the force, but the things Mrs. Sheldon said; and the graphic way she said them, even made her uncomfortable. An hour later, the cop closed her notebook and left the bedside, and Maureen hoped - prayed and hoped that the boy in the other hospital would recover.
She left the hospital two days later. The cop, Officer Mitchell, wasn't going to charge her with anything. It was self-defense, witnesses corroborated the statement; even the cop dispatched to investigate the argument who showed up just in time to watch the rifle go off said it was clear-cut defense. She was free to go on with her life. Problem was, she had no life. Evelyn was going to take her back to Cincinnati as soon as things were settled here in Tulsa.
Her soul was empty. She craved forgiveness. Her arms desperately ached to be held and comforted. Her sister didn't understand. She was so empty, not even tears would come. No one understood. No one.
At least, that's what she thought.
XXX
The newspaper clipping lay in front of me. I'd torn it out of the newspaper when Darry wasn't looking. It was in section E anyway, he never bothered with that section. I'd been home from the hospital two days now, and I was glad to be here. My stomach hurt, and I had to sit hunched over just to take the strain off my stomach muscles. I wasn't able to eat anything solid yet- so soup, cereal, and milkshakes were my diet. I wanted a steak so bad it was killing me.
Darry said if I snuck around and ate stuff the doc said I shouldn't have, it just might kill me. That kept me from wolfing down the house once I was back home. Besides, what went in eventually came back out, and each trip to the bathroom became a new venture in agony. I was surprised what muscles were involved in taking care of business, and I learned a new respect for anyone having abdominal surgery.
Two-Bit was here, hanging out with me while everyone was at work. I think Darry was concerned I'd do something to hurt myself, either by eating something I shouldn't... which I was no glutton for punishment and wouldn't do, or by lifting something to heavy for my insides to take. I don't know why he worried so much, all I did was study for my science final coming up soon, or camp out on the couch and watch television with Two-Bit and whoever else showed up.
Eventually, Darry came home. Since the sun was up longer in the evenings, Darry got more hours in at the work site. I hated that he had to work all the time, but even though the school paid for my entire hospital bill – thanks to insurance that I will never again get on his case for insisting I have - he was still out of work while I was in the hospital. It was catch-up time - again. I looked at the clock, but couldn't see it clearly. "What time is it?"
"Nearly seven. Hungry? I can whip you up a shake if you want it."
"No, thanks. I'll take a steak, medium- well and smothered in mushrooms, though, if you got that in the kitchen." I said, my mouth watering just thinking about it as I lay back on the couch.
"Stop torturing yourself." He grabbed the tube of medicated ointment and slathered it over my stitches. The doc wanted it done at least twice a day to prevent infection. Darry insisted he do it, wanting to make sure I didn't forget. Trust was still an issue between us, but on this, I didn't care. Once he was done, he put the cap back on and headed to the kitchen.
"Well, now that the calvary has arrived, I got to split. See ya tomorrow, Ponyboy." Two-Bit headed out and I yawned, waving good-bye to him as he left.
"Soda working late?" I asked as I got up, headed to the kitchen to talk with Darry.
"I expect him back home soon. Park it in a chair if you ain't gonna stay on the couch. I don't need you busting your stitches."
"You just saw my stitches, they didn't look busted to me."
"I mean the ones on the inside, Pony."
"Oh." I sat down, leaned forward and rested my head on my arms. No position was really comfortable. Everything put stress on my stomach. Once again, I was amazed how often the abdominal muscles were used, 'cause mine hurt constantly. Doc said it would get better as they healed, but they weren't healing fast enough for me.
Darry cracked open a Pepsi and took a swig, leaning back against the sink looking at me. I figured now was as good a time as any.
"Darry, do you know where 'Harmony Edge' is on the West side?"
"The cemetery? Yeah, I know where it is, why?" He looked at me like he knew I was up to something.
"I need you to take me there tomorrow."
"To the heart of Soc territory. Are you nuts?" You'd have to be deaf to not have heard the sarcasm.
"No, I ain't crazy. There's something I gotta do."
"What?"
I got up and retrieved the obituary I tore from the paper, then handed it to him. In silence, I returned to my chair, hunching over to take the strain off my mid-section.
"This? His funeral? Ponyboy Curtis - why? That man nearly killed you. Why would you want to go to his funeral?" Darry was dumbstruck.
Even I didn't have an answer that made sense. I just knew I needed to go. I shrugged, but looked at Darry steady. "I don't have a good reason, but I want to go. Darry, please, I need to go. If you can spare the morning taking me, that is."
"I can't spare the morning, my boss is already tee'd off by how much vacation time I've taken. Pony, why? Why do you want to do this?"
"I can't explain it, Darry," I said, unable to hide my own confusion over this. "But I gotta go. I can ask Two-Bit..."
"No, you ain't asking Two-Bit to haul you down to Soc territory in his beat up crap of a car. Last thing I need is to have him break down with you there in your condition."
"Pony going somewhere?" Soda asked. He was still in his jumpsuit, oil stains all over his clothes. He flicked off his shoes, then stripped the jumpsuit off. Underneath it, he had on a tank top and a pair of denim shorts.
"Did you wear that in to work today?" Darry asked, sidetracked a moment.
"Yeah, it's cooler than my other work clothes. Where's Pony going?" He looked at me, smiling and scruffling my hair with his greasy fingers.
"Cut it out!" I said, swatting his hand away.
Darry looked at us, then shook his head. "I know I'm so gonna regret this, but Soda,seeing as how you're off tomorrow, borrow Steve's car and take him to Harmony Edge Cemetery over on the West side. I'll do what I can to meet you there, but I can't promise anything. At least my work assignment is out that way, I might be able to score an early lunch break. If you see any problems.. and I mean ANY problems, get him out of there fast. Got me?"
"Yeah, sure Darry, just um.. why are we headed to a cemetery in Soc territory?"
"Sheldon is getting buried, and for some God-only-knows reason, Ponyboy is determined to go to it." Darry said with contempt as he looked at me, but I just shrugged. Soda, however, was now the one staring at me.
"Ponyboy, what on Earth are you thinking? That man doesn't deserve any kindness.... especially from you!"
"Soda, please, I know you don't get it. I can't explain it. But I gotta go. Please?" I looked at him, his eyes not understanding me. Maybe they both still think I have some brain damage from whatever happened to me in surgery, but I didn't. I was thinking clearly, and knew this was something I had to do.
"Fine. What time?"
"Starts at ten." I answered.
"Don't think I'm getting dressed up for that rat bastard, cause I ain't."
XXX
The sun shone clear in the sky, the weather nearing eighty degrees. The minister was there, waiting for anyone else to show up. The funeral home provided some chairs, but no canopy. A few of Robert's co-workers were here, but since the press wrote an article about what Robert had done, maliciously shooting that boy unprovoked, most people chose to disassociate from him. She understood. He was an evil man, one she had loved... once, long ago.
The minister looked about, wanting to get started but hesitant. Certainly there were others who cared for this man. The only car approaching was one well below the standard of nice cars from this side of town, an old beat up Plymouth. Perhaps it was a cemetery worker.
The car stopped far enough away to keep the driver separate from the few other cars that had brought the other mourners here. The doors opened and two young men got out.
XXX
"You sure you wanna do this?" Soda asked me. I nodded, holding my stomach as I got out of the car. I was wearing black pants and a white short sleeved dress shirt. No tie. Soda held up to his word refusing to dress nice, and was in jeans and a tank top. Together we walked up the hill in silence, approaching the small group assembled there. Finally, about fifteen feet or so away, Soda stopped, refusing to go any further. I went on, joining the group. The minister nodded his greeting at me, and I nodded back. Finally, taking a last look around, the minister started, and I just stood there, listening to what he said but not really absorbing any of it. I really didn't know why I came, only that I needed to be here.
XXX
The young boy looked so familiar to me, nicely dressed. He might have been one of Bobby's friends, but I wasn't sure. He ended up standing next to me, a foot or so away. Not that that was hard to do. There wasn't but five of us out here now, not including the young man that was hanging back - the one that had brought the younger boy out here. Then, as I looked at the younger boy, I remembered who he was. This was the boy Bobby had nearly drowned and the one Robert had shot. Ponyboy Curtis. Why was he here? I couldn't help glancing at him, slowly sidestepping by inches my way closer to him.
This boy had endured more pain at the hands of my son and husband, yet here he was, paying respect to someone who clearly didn't deserve it. His hand lay on his stomach, and I remembered the lady cop saying he had been shot in the upper abdomen. He wasn't long from being released from the hospital, and my own ribs were still very sore.
I must have gotten closer than I should have, because he suddenly looked up at me, his green eyes bright yet quizzical. He gave me the smallest smile, only the corners of his mouth turned up. Then he returned his gaze to the minister. I felt his hand brush mine.. or maybe mine brushed his first, but whichever the case, his small hand slipped in mine, and I held it. Only when that soft touch, that gentleness of another human soul that had been hurt and damaged so intensely by the evil that was my husband came into contact with me, did my tears come. I let it go, all the things he'd done to me. All the things he'd said to me. All the things he'd taken from me. He couldn't take me, and he couldn't take this boy.
The service ended, Ponyboy let my hand go, and the minister came over to talk. I didn't want to talk to him, but Evelyn held me to that spot. Turning my head, I watched Ponyboy return to the other young man and together they slowly made their way back to that beaten up car. He was holding his stomach again, and the other boy had his arm around him. A truck pulled up behind the car and a well muscled, sunburned man got out. Then I realized - these were his brothers.
"Excuse me," I said, slipping away. The other people who had come were getting in their cars and leaving, not bothering to shake my hand or offer any further condolence. That was okay, only Ponyboy's condolence was real. I could see it in his eyes, felt it in his hand. I made my way down to where they stood, stopping a few feet away.
"Ponyboy," I called to him, softly. He turned to see me, and the oldest one put his hands on Ponyboy's shoulders from behind him, holding Ponyboy to his chest.
"I'm … I'm so sorry... for everything Bobby and Robert did to you … to all of you."
The middle one, who looked so familiar to me but again I couldn't place it, just looked down saying nothing. The older one just stared at me. I understood, my son and husband had caused them more heartache and worry than any human should endure. I knew they hated me. I could live with it. I started to leave, but Ponyboy slipped away from his oldest brother's hands and walked over to me.
"It's okay," he said softly. Again, that small smile was there, a little more pronounced than before.
I put my hands on his shoulders, wanting so much to hold him, but he wasn't my son and I wasn't his mother. Apparently, it didn't matter to him either. He wrapped his arms around me, and I held him close. Forgiveness, oh sweet forgiveness. Thank you.
"You grow up to be someone special, you hear me? Make the world stop and pay attention to you." I said as I let him go.
He nodded. "Yes, ma'am," he said, smiling back at me, this time with all his heart. I felt a trembling smile on my own face, the first real one since Bobby died. There was hope still. I let him go, and he backed up, his brothers standing close on either side of him. I turned and walked back up the hill, behind me I heard some soft words being spoken between them, then a few doors opened and closed. Their vehicles started, and they drove away.
Evelyn and the minister were the only ones left. I thanked the minister, and together the three of us went back to our cars.
"Well, sis, now what?" Evelyn asked me.
"I'm gonna sell that house. Nothing but bad memories live there for me anyway. Then I think I'm going to find a job. What do you think?"
Evelyn smiled at me. "I think that would be just fine."
I never looked back. I had no reason to, my life... even at my age.... was ahead of me. Ponyboy had given it back to me.
XXX
Calla Lilly Rose
