"Fuck,"
Bellatrix licked her bleeding hand, allowing the shard of broken wine bottle to fall to the flag stoned floor with an echoing clink before drawing her wand and pointing the tip to her sliced palm. She non-verbally knitted the skin on both sides of the gash together; stemming the trickle of crimson that had begun to snake its way down her forearm and over her Dark Mark. She considered it closely, head cocked to one side like a curious child until a muffled sob from the floor above shook her back to the cellar of Malfoy Manor, suddenly remembering that she was here to choose an alcoholic pick-me-up for a certain distraught resident.
Rolling her eyes, Bellatrix turned back to the rows of dusty liquor bottles, selecting a particularly strong variety of Firewhisky after ensuring the glass was intact. The sobs grew louder in her ears as she ascended the narrow stone stairway back to the ground floor of the Manor. Holding her breath, she pushed open the black door with serpentine handle that would take her to the drawing room and, stepping in, she gazed around the handsomely furnished room for the source of the cries. It was a few moments before she spotted something curled up in front of the hearth of an ornate marble fireplace.
Narcissa was quivering and breathing shakily, knees drawn up to her chin and clutching what appeared to be a long staff topped with silver. Bellatrix set the bottle down on a carved wooden side table before approaching her sister and dropping to her knees behind her shivering form. She rested a slender hand on Narcissa's arm in a comforting way for a moment before pulling gently, rolling her onto her back so that she lay face up on the wooden floor. In the flickering firelight Bellatrix could see the fairer witch's usually deathly-pale skin was tinged pink in places from her distraught crying. Tear-tracks shone against her cheek bones, and her eyes, her soft brown eyes which would always seem to glow with beauty and happiness now looked dull, as if they'd lost all hope.
"Cissy..." began Bellatrix. She did not know how she felt about Narcissa's state. On one hand, a small part of her wanted to strike her sister; not out of spite or anger, but to shake her into being strong, for Bellatrix had always hated weakness. She found it intolerable, shameful, a thing to be hidden away, especially within her own family. On the other, Narcissa was her sister. The only person she truly loved in this universe, and seeing her in so much pain, so helpless and vulnerable hurt her in ways she herself could not explain; ways in which she was more than certain others would refuse to tolerate. It was this much larger part of herself that wanted nothing more than to gather Narcissa up in her arms; to hold her close and stroke her hair until she fell asleep, like Bellatrix would when they were young, when their parents had beaten the younger of the two senseless and she'd come crawling into her older sister's bed, seeking comfort and warmth in her embrace and in the dark curls of her hair, reassurance and truth in her lovingly spoken words.
You're perfect, Cissy; we both are. I want you to promise me you'll never let them convince you otherwise, understand? We're beautiful. Promise me you'll remember, Narcissa.
Bellatrix wished she could fix things that easily once they'd grown up. At times like these, she'd often wished she could utter a few carefully chosen words as she used to, and like a miracle Narcissa would see light at the end of a tunnel, shining as brightly as the sun and be given hope again. She wished things were that simple.
Of course, they never were. Not anymore.
"Cissy, please get up. Lucius won't be in Azkaban for long. The Dark Lord may be angry but he won't let one of his most loyal followers rot in there; he needs as many Death Eaters active as he can..."
Another two things that hurt Bellatrix: telling her sister such a blatant lie and knowing that Narcissa loved a useless piece of scum like Lucius almost as much as her older sister.
Leaning over her body, she tugged Lucius' serpent-topped walking stick out of Narcissa's grip. To her surprise, her sister did not protest but allowed it to roll from her hands easily. Bellatrix stood, crossed the room and placed it in its holder atop a crystal cabinet.
"I'm scared, Bella."
The older of the two turned to face the younger, concern knitting her eyebrows together as she saw a genuine shadow of fear on Narcissa's face. Behind her eyes and the quiver of her voice she could see a glimpse of a delicate, angelic child with hair like strands of silk woven from white gold cascading down her back.
I'm scared Bella. Mummy and Daddy keep hurting me.
Bellatrix was back on the floor next to her sister in a flash. She coaxed her to sit up and looked into her eyes.
"Why?" she asked, brushing a stray strand of hair behind Narcissa's ear, her eyes widening with concern. Cissy had never been afraid of anything since her childhood had ended; it was always assumed that this was because their mother and father (bastards though they were) had squeezed every last drop of fear from the three Black sisters when they were small. In reality, it was because Narcissa had learned from those times that she had nothing to fear, so long as she had Bella. This, of course, was not true. Bellatrix could not protect her constantly. But the more Narcissa told herself the lie, the more she believed it, until she was convinced it was the God-honest truth. These were the silver linings in all the abuse and pain of their childhood; the youngest and eldest sister's unusually close relationship, and their admirable lack of fear.
Lack of fear that is, until one was concerned for the other. It was for this reason that Bellatrix did not know why she asked for the reason her sister was afraid when she already knew the answer. Maybe she just dreaded it being confirmed; clinging to one last hope that Narcissa would learn to fear for something other than the welfare of her raven-haired sister. God, she was a hypocrite. All Bellatrix did was fear for the welfare of her Cissy; so why couldn't she let Narcissa fear for her in the same way?
Narcissa looked back into Bellatrix's eyes.
"I'm not afraid for Lucius," she began. Bellatrix felt her heart sink. That last, desperate hope had been extinguished. "I'm afraid for you. What if the Dark Lord punishes you too? Worse than he has Lucius? I've lived fourteen years without you, Bella, I cannot do it again. And... and..."
Narcissa closed her eyes and bit her lip as a single tear slid down her cheek. "What if you don't survive this war? You did the first, but you can't deny the amount of close calls. Too many. Too close. I dread to think what would've happened if Severus had not brewed up that batch of Felix Felicis in time for the first attack on the Order of the Phoenix-"
Bellatrix pressed a single finger against Narcissa's lips, silencing her. With her other hand she cupped the blonde's cheek and wiped the tear away from her face with her thumb. She took her finger away.
"Shhh... Cissy..." She whispered. Slowly, cautiously, Bellatrix leaned in and pressed her lips against Narcissa's; kissing her tenderly, returning all the feelings for the woman she loved, putting every emotion into the way her lips crushed her sister's. Narcissa could almost hear an unspoken message from Bellatrix being communicated through the kiss; it rung clearly inside her head and, despite her suspicions that the words were empty of meaning, she felt the warmth of reassurance rise in her chest.
You have nothing to fear, Cissy; I'm not going anywhere.
When they pulled back each looked into the other's eyes and Bellatrix allowed a smile to flit her lips momentarily when she saw the happiness behind Narcissa's return, but swapped it for a grin when she saw something else dancing behind the chocolate orbs.
Could that be... lust?
And finally, Bellatrix knew that Narcissa still lusted for her, that she had been lying when she had said, the day after Bellatrix returned, that she didn't want her in that way any more.
"Cissy!" Bellatrix shouted with glee as she ran at her little sister, fresh from Azkaban, gaunt face alight with relief and ecstasy; and Narcissa embraced her like she would never have the chance again. However, when Bellatrix made as if to passionately kiss her, Narcissa turned her face to the side, making the kiss connect her cheek. The dark-haired witch pulled back and observed the other, looking crestfallen and confused. Narcissa smiled sadly.
"I've never been happier to have you back, Bella; but we can't go on like we did in the old days. We're too old for this. I have a son to look after now and we can't risk being caught anymore."
Now Bellatrix's face was alight with triumph. She stood, helped Narcissa to her feet and sat her down on the couch next to the side table, before striding over and thrusting the bottle of Firewhisky into her sister's hands. All traces of tears had gone; Narcissa's cheeks were now flushed with anticipation.
"Drink," ordered Bellatrix, a glint of madness in her eyes. Narcissa looked at her inquiringly. "I know you want to- don't deny it," She grinned wickedly at her little sister. "I've managed to restrain myself all this time because I believed you when you said that you didn't want it. I need you now, Cissy. I can't have you bailing on me this time; and there's little chance of that if you're drunk."
Narcissa looked at the bottle, then to Bellatrix. Her chest was heaving, her eyes hooded and lips parted. Narcissa knew that she didn't need to be drunk; she wanted to be fucked by Bellatrix as much as Bellatrix needed to fuck her, but at the same time she knew from the old days that when the darker of the two was aroused, it was easier to just go by her rules; for she was dominant. It was by this reasoning that Narcissa obediently tipped the bottle to her lips, gulping down the stinging drink and relishing in the burn of alcohol until the bottle was half empty. Bellatrix grinned again when she stopped drinking.
"Happy?" Narcissa asked, half-frustrated, half-amused that she had made the dark-haired witch want her so badly with the mere look in her eyes.
"Mmm... very, Cissy..." Bellatrix replied as she took the bottle from her, and, tilting it to her own lips, she finished the rest of the drink. The younger of the two felt a rush of gratitude; at least she wouldn't be the only one drunk when they got started. Bellatrix may be dominant and controlling, but she was fair before the fucking began.
Narcissa's head was just beginning to swim when her sister threw the bottle aside; she heard it shatter in a corner as Bellatrix flopped down next to her on the couch. They looked each other in the eyes one last time, in a way that made the other's heart rate double before Bellatrix moved in, this kiss more passionate than the first. Narcissa parted her lips and felt the raven-haired girl's tongue slip into her mouth; she pushed back with her own, and each tasted alcohol lingering on the other's breath. Bellatrix slid her hand up her sister's dress and skimmed along her thigh, raking her skin with long fingernails as she went, making her younger partner whimper and tangle her hands in her dark curls.
"Oh God, Bella I missed you," Narcissa confessed, pulling her body closer to Bellatrix. "I've wanted to truly have you back for-"
The rest of her words were cut off. The waiting finally got the better of Bellatrix as she practically dived on the blonde, pinning her on her back by her forearms against the leather of the couch, breathing raggedly against Narcissa's lips between fierce kisses. Bellatrix bit down on her lower lip; licking beads of copper blood from where they welled before trailing a line of kisses along the curve of Narcissa's jaw, moving up to her ear and whispering; "I'm going to fuck you so hard you can't remember who or where you are. I'm going to make you beg me to let you come in my mouth, Cissy... Fuck, I haven't tasted you in so long..." Narcissa whimpered again. "You always loved dirty talk," Bellatrix continued, breathing lowly, sliding her hands over the curves of her sister's waist as she pressed her body firmly against the blonde's. "I get it now, Cissy; you hold yourself with such dignity, so reserved and... refined, when all you want is to be tied down and fucked senseless." She cupped her breasts through the fabric of her dress and squeezed them, hard; making Narcissa gasp in a mixture of pleasure and pain. "You're trying to hide that little secret," she taunted, a wicked grin adorning her face.
Narcissa answered only with a groan.
Bellatrix then kissed her throat, allowing her tongue to bathe and taste the pale skin before sinking her teeth into the blonde's lower neck, leaving her mark while Narcissa involuntarily cried out in pleasure. The eldest sat up for a moment and began to undo her sister's dress, sliding it down over her shoulders until the snowy skin of Narcissa's breasts became exposed to the cool air. She caressed the perfect curves of them with fingers and tongue before taking each hardened nipple into her mouth, kneading and sucking restlessly as Narcissa sighed; her breathing shallower while wetness began to seep through her knickers. The ache between her legs became agonising as Bellatrix began to subconsciously roll her hips against Narcissa's.
"Bella... please..." Narcissa begged, her voice thick and heavy with need.
"I love doing this to you, Narcissa," Bellatrix hissed, aware of her own desire weighing down her voice. "I love hearing you say my name when you want my tongue in your cunt... you're my filthy little slut, aren't you, Cissy?"
"Then fuck me like one," Narcissa groaned, digging her nails into Bellatrix's back and searching for the zipper that kept her dress up. Bellatrix guided her to it and slid out of her own clothing, leaving herself in nothing but a set of black lacy underwear and bra. She kissed Narcissa one last time on the lips while ripping off the rest of the younger's dress, making her moan into Bellatrix's mouth. The darker haired of the two began to make her way down, leaving a trail of hot, open-mouthed kisses on Narcissa's stomach before lightly biting her hip bones, hands wandering from the curve of her waist to her legs. She slid them up her silky inner thighs before pulling down her wet knickers and throwing them across the room, drawing a series of encouraging noises from the woman beneath her. Bellatrix lowered her head between her sister's legs. Her breath teased Narcissa's swollen clit, making her hips act of their own accord as they rose off the leather couch, straining for contact with Bellatrix's mouth, which was hovering, frustratingly, just out of reach. "Shit! Bella! please..." she gasped, repeating her plea as wetness began to drip down her thighs.
"Please... what?"
"Fuck me, Bella! Fuck me until I come screaming your name!"
"Oh don't worry, love, I fucking will. You're never going to want Lucius' dick again after this," she promised, breathing lowly.
Bellatrix then dragged her tongue across Narcissa's weeping slit, feeling her sister's body shudder beneath her. Fingernails dug into the leather below as the dark-haired witch flicked her tongue against Narcissa's clit before drawing circles against the small nub of flesh. She moaned against the blonde, sending vibrations surging through her sister's lower abdomen as a strong sensation began to build up inside Narcissa, spreading through her entire body and making her mind cloudy in a way that had nothing to do with alcohol.
"Ooohhhh God, fuck," Narcissa released a low groan from deep within her throat as Bellatrix slipped two fingers inside of her, massaging her walls briefly before gathering wetness on the tips and withdrawing her digits.
"Soaked… just like old times…" Bellatrix smirked, enjoying her power. She licked her fingers clean and moaned again, relishing in Narcissa's taste after fifteen long years of being deprived of such pleasure. Narcissa began to squirm from lack of contact.
She gasped incoherently, "Bella, please! I can't… I need…!
Bellatrix cut her off again, pushing her fingers back inside her, finding the right spot easily as she began to slide in and out, gently fucking and exploring her walls before thrusting hard against Narcissa's g-spot. "Ohhhhh, fuck, yes! Belllaaaaa!" the blonde threw her head back and her eyes fluttered shut. With her breathing erratic and her heartbeat pounding in her ears, she found herself nearing climax; begging for that last push that would tip her over the edge. Bellatrix leaned up towards Narcissa's face. When their foreheads were almost touching, Narcissa looked up to see a predatory greed burning in her sister's eyes.
"You're mine, Cissy; say it!" she snarled against Narcissa's lips, her possessive nature taking over as she grabbed a fistful of blonde locks, driven on by the pooling heat between her thighs.
"I'm yours Bella! Shit... uggff... you know I am!" she whimpered, finding herself gripping onto any part of Bellatrix she could reach, face contorted in frustration; putting all her effort into stringing together a coherent sentence. "Yours! I always have been and I always fucking will! PLEASE! BELLA!"
Finally, Bellatrix gave in to her sister's pleas. Returning between the blonde's legs, she lowered her head again, sucking Narcissa's clit while allowing her rhythm to dissolve, pounding relentlessly into her dripping core. Narcissa felt her legs begin to shake as the powerful sensation built up again, surging through her body as she tangled her hands in Bellatrix's hair, pushing her head down, forcing her to keep working her clit. Bellatrix licked and pressed against her with her tongue, using just enough pressure to give her release. Wave after wave of pure, undiluted bliss crashed through Narcissa as she cried out Bellatrix's name and drenched her fingers with her orgasm. She then fell limp against the couch with her eyes closed before Bellatrix gathered her up, allowing her sister to ride out the post-orgasmic high in her arms.
It was while she sat there, cradling Narcissa, allowing her breathing to return to normal when realisation dawned.
When she said she didn't want this anymore, it was not for the risk of being caught, or for her son. It was for our sanity. She was trying to protect us both.
Bellatrix stared sadly into the dying flames, the dreamlike aura of truly having Narcissa back crashing down around her. She held her younger sister tighter, feeling she had ruined the serene, idyllic little creature in her arms. Like she had ripped away all grace and purity and virtue from an angel. Tainted her. Fucked her up.
And as if reading Bellatrix's mind, or rather, the guilty look etched upon her face, Narcissa turned her face up to her sister.
"Bella, don't feel bad for this," Bellatrix looked at her, two identical pairs of brown eyes locking in a meaningful gaze. "We're both a lot less fucked up with each other than we are without."
Bellatrix considered this. She remembered herself, isolated in Azkaban, and then Narcissa's behaviour after facing their parent's madness alone.
Smiling, she silently agreed.
