Disclaimer: I do not own any characters or recognizable characters, all credit belongs to Once Upon A Time. I'm merely borrowing them to dance to my will.
AN: Hello there! I'm quite new and decided to try this out, fanfiction that is. It may not meet most expectations but I just had this story bouncing around my head. Reviews, however bad or good, are welcomed. Thank you.
Dear Henry,
It was right after Neverland as we docked into the sea filled air of Storybrooke. I must admit, seeing this place fills me with warmth. Although many of its citizens would protest, it's my home. I made it myself and ten years of it was spent with you. At first I considered it my eternal hell. Then it brought me, you, Emma, and a shook me from my tabula rasa veil of evil magic within. Though that's not what you want to hear, is it now my little prince?
You want to know why I left.
I'll tell you.
Looking upon Emma, the Charmings, and Neal did I realize, you have it. Your perfect family. Now...I do love you Henry. I've raised you as best I could, with as much as love as I could manage, seeing as I've never quite had parental love myself growing up.
I truly tried. And if I'm honest, it wasn't that hard. Loving you. It wasn't difficult at all, because you wiggled yourself into my heart faster than anyone could have imagined. You truly are the most special boy. My special boy. No matter what happens or what you choose, you are mine. And I'm yours.
But it seems you've picked.
And that's okay.That's okay.
I know you'll be spending more time with Charming and his famous camping trips he's awarded you. As for Snow, make sure it isn't all sweet and fats. I know you to be the kind of child who knows what's good for him and what's not. I raised you better than to eat donuts every morning. In any case, I've left a food chart.
Don't worry about me, I'll be fine. Don't try to find me. I've made sure to make Ms. Swans tracking ability a non-workable sight. I hope you have your happy ending, and I hope to find mine within the road in front of me. Once again, I love you.
Love mom.
P.S.-don't ever forget my time as your mother, for I will never forget my time being just that. The pizza rewards, picnics, and the ever staged question for the weekends, "what should we do today?"
Because this, leaving you, is the most difficult thing I've ever had to do.
I almost didn't, but I couldn't be here anymore.
Goodbye my little prince.
Mommy loves you.
She knows it sounded cliché and simple, but she needed the very boy she's writing to understand. In the most simplistic way as possible. He didn't need to know the other reasons, not the reasons that involved Emma. Regina debated on whether to write her a letter too; she decided against it.
No, she thought, then she'd never leave this study, sorting through all her emotions and actions through ink. In lieu of the letter for Emma she opted on a singular item and a short sentence. Going to kitchen she picked it up. It's ironic and completely them. She placed the letter with the words "Henry" on the counter-top, then placed an apple next to it with a stick-it note simply reading, "goodbye Emma"
With that she entered her Mercedes and drove out of her beloved town filled with hatred for her. It seems that's how it'll always be, something she loves will always react the opposite to her, much like the push of magnets. She'll try, and try as she might the other will gravitate away forcibly and completely. Regina passed the welcome sign, she worked three weeks to get the barrier off. The citizens are now free to roam outside of Storybrooke. Though, she only worked tediously to set herself free.
As soon as Regina passed a throb filled her chest, gripping the steering wheel, she floored on.
Somewhere in the sleeping town, under the stars in a shabby apartment, a blonde haired woman shot up from her bed gasping. She threw her legs over the bed and held her chest. She made a small whimpering noise and held, and held, and held. Then it subsided. She sat taking deep breaths for a moment, then looked to the smaller sleeping form, Henry. Emma didn't know why or how but she knew, that something important has happened within their lives. Little did she know that by the time she knew, it'll be too late.
Past
It was subtle at first, it started with lingering looks, then it slowly formed into touches. The journey to Neverland was dreadfully long. Emma did much to keep the peace between…well...everyone. But no one more than Regina. In order for her to keep Regina at bay, she stayed near her. At first Regina would give her THE GLARE. The glare that said,"please-go-away-you-trepid-little-uncultured-blonde-I-hate-you." And so much more.
But Emma stayed. She stayed close to the brunette, even went as far as to share a room with her. They had bunk beds and Regina said she wanted the top. It really didn't bother Emma, it only bothered her when Regina made snide comments such as," I never go on bottom."
Then it had Emma thinking, taking it as a challenge. She often pushed it away to focus on saving Henry. Some days were spent giving Regina looks, looks that said, "please-don't-murder-them-we-need-them."
So Regina retaliated from whatever insult she gave Snow. Soon that turned into a few nudges from Emma. Then the nudge turned into a hand on her back, or Emma's hand brushing across the short-tempered woman's shoulder.
After a couple more days, Regina had gone through strenuous magic to speed up the process, Rumple merely sat upon a post and told her it's no good, that they'll get there when they get there. Regina never listened. So as she overextended her magic coursing through her body she leaned too far backwards, a pair of hands always slightly touched her back. Regina straightened herself but always she had a difficult time walking, she tried as highly as she could, to walk normally. Though Emma grabbed her and took her weight, at first Regina hated the idea of weakness showing by this gesture it eventually turned to a sigh from Regina while she relented to Emma leading her down to their room. Then sat her down on her bunk, Regina rebuked by trying to stand up. Only to quickly lose balance as the boat leaned far too much, then it happened… With a lean and an exhausted state, Regina stumbled into Emma's lap.
In all circumstances Emma should've pushed, she should've gotten up and enjoyed the way the royal woman would've fallen on her ass and used THE GLARE at her again.
She didn't.
Maybe it was the emptiness swallowing her whole being without Henry. Or maybe it was the few days of playing Gandhi among enemies and family. Maybe it was Regina's humph and oomph as she fell, landing on a pair of legs, and her cheek brushed pass Emma's, making the savior slightly lean into soft skin. Maybe it was loneliness.
Whatever it was Emma didn't do anything, she merely wrapped her arms around the other woman's waist and said, "Stop."
Regina did her glare and humphed again, but Emma held on, it felt nice. To hold someone again, to feel something that's solid but contradicting with soft skin.
"Ms. Swan. I don't-"
"Please, I just need something."
Emma knew that was a pathetic way to say, "I'm so tired of everything."
She expected Regina to push again, or thrash and pout. She readied herself and greedily took whatever warmth she had now. Though the next move surprised her, Regina huffed then took a deep breath and sighed before leaning back. As if Emma were a chair. What Emma didn't know was that Regina was tired too, she couldn't be on a ship with Snow and Charming long enough to not feel the need to criticize everything. Emma didn't know Regina didn't sleep because she was worried about Henry. Emma didn't know anything but the fact that right at that moment, the ever tense woman relaxed. She laid her head in the curve between Emma's neck and shoulder and looked at the patterns of wood on the ceiling.
Regina was exhausted from everything. More so than Emma, but of course, the woman who held her, didn't know nor understood. Even so, Emma held her and rested her chin on the slender shoulder of Regina. They spent more days like this, they'd come down here after Regina had used her magic to speed them again, and Emma would sit, then Regina would follow. Milky skin would wrap around caramel brown and they'd sit.
No words were ever spoken during this time. It wasn't needed, for their actions spoke tidal waves of need. Soon sitting turned to sleeping. One day they sat too long like that and Regina closed her eyes before she could get up and make her way to the second bunk. Emma leaned against the wall, and somehow they found each other under the covers and holding one another in their sleep.
They never spoke of this, how looks turned to sleeping by one another. In fact, once they awoke, it was back to snide comments and Emma's stern form between them, the queen and her rivals.
Perhaps if they spoke of it, they would've known the growing bond between them, the silent understanding that's been there since Emma's touch had sent a hat spiraling to a new world.
Present
Somewhere in a Boston café a woman with short brunette hair, a pen, and a journal, sat. She drank caramel coffee and had sliced apples in front of her. She leafed through the pages and bit into a slice. She looked at the list of cities and towns and festivals. She drank the coffee and put the journal down feeling waves of nostalgia.
Henry and she had made a bucket list of places to go within the tiny grey journal. First place was, ironically, Boston. She placed a red check besides the lettering. A grimace formed itself upon the former queens' visage. Henry had already been here…without her.
"He'd started the journey already," she thought. A pang of guilt spread through her torso and suddenly, the slices of her red apples and caramel vanilla coffee didn't seem appealing.
She pulled out another journal, this one bigger and a dark purple it almost looked blue.
She turned to the first page.
Dear Henry,
I'm in Boston. Do you remember our travel pact? Well I suppose with my small fortune I've accumulated over the past twenty-eight years, it could be done. First stop, Boston. Though you've already been here. It has me wondering if you've passed this café shop, perhaps you didn't even notice. Your nose must have been buried in maps and your book. Never the less, I'm here. There's a variety amount of people here. Not unlike Storybrooke at all. There's a woman with perhaps ten more piercings than is required. But I suppose it's her choice. Then a man who seems to look a bit like Leroy, but tall; obviously. Though he seems nice, seeing as he always smiles at customers. Let me take back my last comment, this man isn't at all like Leroy.
Anyway, I figured I'd write about my journey. So that, in a way, we'd do this together, as promised. Even if you never do read these accounts, I'll still do this, and one day, maybe, I'll send this to you, and we'll have these memories.
Love mom.
