The Valentine's Day Disaster Prologue J. Franklin

THE ST. VALENTINE'S DAY DISASTER

PROLOGUE

(SCENE: The apartment hallway. PENNY, AMY, and BERNADETTE are walking up the stairwell and arrive on the floor of PENNY'S apartment carrying shopping bags. They are all excited.)

AMY: I can't believe we all chipped in for the guys' Valentine's Day gifts! This is going to be so much fun! (Pauses) You know, besides finally having a boyfriend FOR Valentine's Day!

BERNADETTE: I can't believe we all agreed on what to get them!

PENNY: And I can't believe we got it all for less than $150 apiece! (Opens door) The Cheesecake Factory is known for a lot of things, but bonuses aren't one of them!

BERNADETTE: (Sets bags down and removes coat) I thought you were making extra money now that they were letting you tend bar?

PENNY: Yeah, well that kind of fizzled when I got drunk with Leonard's mom last time. (Shakes head) Who knew offering to show your underwear to customers for tips would be frowned on?

BERNADETTE: (Shocked) You did that?

PENNY: No, Leonard's mom did. (Pauses) I tell you, tequila and that woman do NOT mix!

BERNADETTE: This calls for some wine!

AMY: I agree!

(PENNY and BERNADETTE look at her.)

PENNY: (Reaches under counter) You're VOLUNTARILY drinking with us now?

AMY: Yes, but don't tell my mother. She still thinks you're both teetotalers like she is!

BERNADETTE: Where would she have gotten an idea like that?

AMY: I think I may have mentioned it on the phone to her the last time we were drunk.

PENNY: (Shrugs and begins pouring wine.) Suits me!

BERNADETTE: (Thinking) Hey, Penny, do you think the guys will really like what we got them?

PENNY: I think so!

AMY: Me too!

PENNY: I mean, let's face it. (Pauses) Who WOULDN'T enjoy a full spa day? (Takes sip) I mean, we got them EVERYTHING. Manicures, pedicures, massages, facials, mud baths – hell, it makes me wish WE'D gotten it instead of them!

AMY: (Interrupts) Oh, and don't forget! They get to be naked the entire time, too! (Sips and looks at PENNY) Makes ME wish we'd gotten it, too!

PENNY: (Uneasy) Um, okay. Let's go a little slow on that chardonnay, okay?

AMY: (Looks down at glass) Okay.

BERNADETTE: But do you think guys like going to the spa? Howard's never talked about it.

PENNY: (Thinks) Come to think of it, neither has Leonard. (She and BERNADETTE look at AMY)

AMY: Don't look at me. The whole idea of Sheldon getting in a mud bath was what sold me on this idea!

PENNY: (To BERNADETTE) But c'mon! Why are you worried! It's the PERFECT gift! I mean, who WOULDN'T want a day at the spa?

(Cut to: The guys' apartment. LEONARD, RAJ, HOWARD, and SHELDON are all crowded around SHELDON'S laptop computer.)

SHELDON: And…there we go! It's done!

LEONARD: Perfect!

RAJ: All right!

HOWARD: The perfect Valentine's Day gift! (Pauses) I mean, who WOULDN'T want their own selection of costumes and a full day pass to Comic-Con?

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