A/N: I am disgraceful, and I deeply, deeply regret absolutely nothing at all because I had tons of fun writing this.


Lizzie had never been on a date before.

It was safe to say that as the future Queen of Hearts she had a reputation to uphold, and courtship was simply not the right way to uphold that.

No, the right way was to simply act innocent. Draw them in. Sweet talk. Play nice.

And then snap them up in her clutches. Much like a venus flytrap, she reckoned.

Being a ... how should she say it, stud, didn't really help her good reputation (or what was left of it). The truth was, she just enjoyed it, and if people avoided her in the halls, sneered her name when speaking, like a stain of blood on a pure wedding dress, well, all in all she considered it a success.

Plus, as a queen she wouldn't really have much time to keep up her playgirl ways. She needed to take advantage of this while she was still young.

And damn was it fun.


She was sitting drinking tea with Kitty when the question arose. The sly cat was always a good partner in crime/wing woman/friendly competitor, and they often spent their days chatting and teasing.

"Wanna make a bet?"

Lizzie smirked at her. "Depends what it entails."

Kitty shook her head. "Oh, Elizabeth, wrong answer. Fuck restrictions; if I want a bet with you your immediate response should be asking me when we start."

Lizzie rolled her eyes. Kitty could be so eccentric sometimes, part of her Wonderlandish charm.

"When do we start?" she asked, sipping her tea.

Kitty grinned with joy. "Right now!" She slammed her hand down on the table to officially start the bet. Maybe that wasn't such a good idea though, as she knocked over her tea in the process and caused everyone in the café to stare at them.

"Oops," Kitty murmured.

After cleaning up the spilled tea, they returned to their negotiations.

"So let me get this straight: you want to see which one of us can sleep with the most girls in two weeks?" Lizzie asked, her mind still processing variables.

Kitty nodded.

"I'm in," Lizzie exclaimed. "Because let's face it, you're good Cheshire, but nobody can top me."

Kitty scoffed. "I think I have a chance Hearts, because guess what? You've slept with a bunch of students before, they all hate your guts. At least I have that advantage over your skinny ass."

Lizzie laughed out loud and offered her hand to Kitty. The shook on the bet, the pair still laughing.

And really, that's where this whole thing begun.


They arranged it all to happen in one of the many storage closets the school had. They would fuck in there and then slip away, while the other person stood outside the door, keeping score of how many people had been subjected to a quite frankly cruel and petty bet that occurred between the two hedonists that unlucky fortnight.

Today, it was Lizzie standing outside the closet while Kitty was inside, doing things Lizzie did not want to imagine. She hummed quietly, doing anything to block out the noises that she could hear.

Finally, Kitty exited, her hair and outfit slightly more rumpled than they had been when she walked it. Lizzie smirked at her. "Enjoy yourself?"

Kitty smirked. "You bet your card deck I did!" she yelled in glee.

"Still think you can beat me?"

Kitty laughed, a fierce cackle. "I just fucked Apple White! If I don't beat you, the universe is working against me for some unknown and unfair reason."

Lizzie chuckled and slung her arm around her partner in crime's shoulders. "Oh, Katherine. Innocent, innocent, Katherine."

"That's not my full name," Kitty mumbled.

"Unfortunately, you have hit rock bottom, my friend. And you know why?" she asked.

"Enlighten me." Kitty deadpanned.

"You just climbed up a tree that's already been conquered by yours truly." Lizzie smiled with glee, walking off and almost skipping with happiness.

Kitty groaned. "Give up Hearts! You're gonna be buying me free drinks for a month so just accept it."

"In your catnip high-induced dreams, Cheshire Slut!" Lizzie yelled back at her.

"Fuck off, Whore of Hearts," Kitty muttered under her breath.

She smiled to herself as Lizzie rounded the corner and disappeared out of sight. This competition wasn't over yet, and she knew in her heart she could still win this.


Two weeks had passed, and the majority of the student body had come to realise what they were doing now, which unfortunately meant a bit of maneuvering as they struggled to find a new place where they could carry out the bet in privacy.

On the penultimate day it was Kitty's turn to stand outside the door of the abandoned classroom they'd found, as Lizzie was inside doing who knows what. Kitty didn't want to think about that.

Too bad I have an over-active imagination, she thought with a wicked smirk. Her face fell though as the noises got louder, and there was a sinking feeling in her stomach as she realised that she was deeply uncomfortable with the situation.

Maybe this bet wasn't such a good idea after all, she thought. But why?

She still had no idea what she was feeling, and emotions swirled in her mind like a dark storm cloud. She wasn't used to feeling this way at all, especially around Lizzie.

She thought for a while.

Okay. Maybe she had lied to herself a bit. Maybe she did feel like this when Lizzie fucked around. But it didn't mean anything, because Kitty fucked around too, and there was nothing either of them could do about it.

She heard the lock on the door click and turned away, hoping to give Lizzie's latest victim (okay, maybe victim was a bit too strong a word, but she'd just admitted that she had fallen for her partner in crime and she wasn't in the mood to play nice) some privacy.

Once she was sure the cost was clear she knocked on the door once, giving Lizzie time to object, before entering the classroom and locking the door behind her.

She turned and stared at Lizzie, and her heart seemed to stop in her chest and fall to the ground.

Lizzie's hair was ruffled, falling around her body and framing her face in a halo of red and black locks. Her skin almost seemed to glow in an ethereal way, and for the first time in her life, Kitty was struck down at how beautiful Lizzie actually was.

"Kitty, are you alright?" Lizzie asked. She realised she'd been staring and smiled.

"I'm fine," she replied.

Lizzie smiled back. "Good, then tell me, who's winning so far? I want to be able to crush you like an ant," she said sweetly.

"Obviously I'm winning." kitty rolled her eyes. Lizzie scoffed.

"I don't think so, because I just had sex with Raven Queen, and surely that should get me double points!" Lizzie protested.

"You're making that up - it's my bet, and I decide the rules," Kitty said smugly.

"Then that's ridiculously biased, as obviously you're going to tip the scale in your favour!" Lizzie stood up, squaring off against Kitty. The atmosphere in the room was heavy and tense, and Kitty could feel the energy crackling like lightning between them.

"I wouldn't do such a thing! If I win this - which I will - it will be because I earned it!" she yelled at Lizzie.

"This is so stupid," Lizzie yelled back.

"I know!" Kitty exclaimed, and suddenly she felt arms wrap around her and Lizzie pulled her closer, smashing their lips together in a heated kiss. Kitty responded immediately, her hands grasping Lizzie's hips and pushing her against a table. They continued to kiss, their tongues colliding.

Finally, they came up for air, as if they suddenly remembered that breathing was necessary for living. Kitty stared into Lizzie's deep teal eyes and realised that Lizzie was looking down at their bodies, pressed so closely together as if to have as little space between them as possible.

Lizzie looked up, intending to say something, but instead found Kitty's lips pressed against her own, and they were softer and smoother than she thought they'd be. Lizzie laughed to herself, because truth be told she had thought about it.

And now it was finally happening.


Almost two hours later they sat drinking tea, just like they had two weeks ago when this whole thing began, except there was a decidedly different mood between the two girls this time.

Lizzie stared into her empty teacup, pondering whether she should just ask and get it over with or build up to it.

"Does this violate the Bro Code?" Kitty asked out of nowhere.

"What?"

"Us fucking. Does it violate the Code?" Kitty asked again, and Lizzie held in her laughter caused by her friend's serious expression.

"I don't think so." Lizzie shook her head. Kitty smiled.

"Good, because if it did then -"

"Is this a date?" Lizzie finally asked. Kitty stopped for a second, shocked, before regaining her composure.

"Do you normally take the girls you fuck out for tea afterwards?"

Lizzie shook her head.

"Then it's a date," Kitty said simply.

"But what does that mean? For us?" Lizzie asked.

"Do you want it to mean something?" Kitty asked, setting her tea down.

Lizzie pulled Kitty into a kiss, her hand resting on the back of her neck. Kitty sighed into it, smiling against Lizzie's lips.

Lizzie thought about how right this felt, kissing her partner in crime.

She broke the kiss and whispered in Kitty's ear, "Do you want to fuck again?"

Kitty laughed. "Strangest date I've ever been on," she said, still laughing, as she stood up and led Lizzie away.

Lizzie smiled to herself. If all her dates with Kitty were going to be like this, then she really should have started dating sooner.

End.


A/N: Disgraceful. Absolutely disgraceful.

But, come on, you know you wanted playgirl Lizzie and Kitty getting together after mindlessly fucking the brains out of everyone in the school. You know you wanted it deep down. Deep, deep down in some twisted corner of your brain.

Please R&R and let me know what you thought. Constructive criticism is encouraged.