S.O.C. Kitty
A TUFF Day for Kitty
Disclaimer: I do not own T.U.F.F. Puppy. It belongs to Butch Hartman. I do not make any profit from this.
Anyways, this fic will have stuff from 'The Kitty Katswell Show', as well as its OCs. I had help with this from T.U.F.F.-Agent Cruz & DarkMageDragon. And 'S.O.C. Kitty' is taped in front of a 'live' studio audience.
It was a wonderful day in Petropolis. Birds were singing. Kids were going to school & they were complaining. And Agent Nutz was collecting nuts & balls into his mouth again.
Anyways, let's see what the TUFF agents are up to.
It shows, Dudley at Kitty's cubical.
He was reading the comic section of the newspaper.
"Ha!" he laughs at the paper, as the audience laughs at his stupidity.
Just then, his partner. Kitty Katswell walks up with a fresh batch of chocolate chip cookies.
The audience applaudes, whistles, & cheers for her.
"Morning, Dudley." she said. "Do you want some cookies, that I made?"
"Uh." Dudley said, as he started remembering the last time, that Kitty baked some cookies. "No, thanks Kitty. I'm full."
Kitty frowned.
"Don't worry, I actually used flour, eggs, sugar, & chocolate chips this time, Dudley." she said.
"Oh!" Dudley exclaims. "Then I'll have some!"
Then he takes some cookies & takes a bite from one of them.
"Mmmmmm!" Dudley said, as he eats the cookie. "This is delicious, Kitty."
Kitty blushes.
The audience awws & laughs at this.
"Thank you, Dudley." she said. "I'm so happy to hear that."
"Mmmmm!" Dudley said, as he finished his cookies.
"Now to give the Chief, some of my cookies." Kitty said, as she turns to the direction of the Chief's office.
"Okay, Kitty." Dudley called out to her.
Just then, the Chief and Keswick walks up.
"Morning, Agent Pa-Pa-Puppy." Keswick greeted.
"Morning, Dudley." the Chief said.
"Morning, you two." Dudley said. "Kitty was looking for you."
The Chief & Keswick groans, as they rolled their eyes, as the audience laughs.
"What the ha-ha-hell do she want now?" Keswick asks.
"She's probably, gonna tell us something boring." the Chief said. "You know how it is, with Ms. Boring."
"Yeah." Keswick said.
Just then, Kitty walks up to them.
"Hey, guys." she greeted to the Chief & Keswick. "Do you want some of my freshly baked cookies?"
"Uh?" Keswick & the Chief said, as they looked at each other, as the audience laughs.
"Don't worry." Kitty started. "There's no fish in them, this time. Just chocolate chips."
Keswick takes a cookie & so does the Chief.
"Go ahead & eat it." Kitty said.
So Keswick takes a bite of his cookie.
"Mmmm!" he said. "This is ga-ga-good, Chief! Mmmmmm!"
He finishes off his cookie, as the audience laughs.
The Chief takes a bite from his cookie.
"Mmmmmm!" he said in a acting voice. "This is good."
"I'm glad, that you enjoy it, Chief." Kitty said.
"Oh look!" the Chief shouted. "A giant ball of yarn!"
Kitty turns to the direction, that the Chief pointed, with a crazy look on her face.
The audience laughs.
"HAAA!" the Chief shouted, as he tossed the cookie into the trash chute.
Kitty turns to see, what the Chief did.
"Chief? Did you throw my cookie down the trash chute?" she asks.
"No." the Chief lied. "I threw one of Tammy's nasty ass cookies into the trash chute. She made peanut butter cookies. I hate peanut butter cookies!"
"Good." Kitty said, as she smiles.
"Now, Agent Katswell." the Chief started. "Go get me, my morning coffee."
"Yes, sir." Kitty said in a sad voice, as she gave Dudley the plate of cookies.
Dudley eats the rest of the cookies.
"Mmmmmm! Good!" he said, as he ate the cookies.
The audience laughs at his greediness.
10 minutes later.
Kitty had made the Chief's coffee.
"Here you go, Chief." she said, as she gives him the coffee.
"Thank you, Agent Katswell." the Chief said.
Then he gets an intel.
"Get that intel for me, Agent Katswell." the Chief orders.
"Yes, sir." Kitty said in a sad voice, as she gets the intel.
She gives it to him.
"Here you go, sir." she said.
The Chief looks at it.
"Oh shit!" the Chief exclaims, as he presses the button onto his intercom. "AGENT PUPPY! COME INTO MY OFFICE!"
Then Dudley kicks in the Chief's door.
"What is it, Chief?" Dudley asked.
"Snaptrap & DOOM is robbing Darran's Candy store." the Chief started. "You & Agent Katswell go & stop his fruity ass!"
"What!" Kitty asked. "Why are we stopping Snaptrap from robbing a lame-ass candy store? Why don't we stop real criminals like, Murder Inc.?"
Then she takes out a notepad & photos of Murder Inc.
"See? I tracked down their movements, plans, & shit like that." Kitty said. "I also got photos of them. So, we can start trying to stop them, but instead of lame-ass blasters. We use actual guns & bullets."
"Shut the hell up, Liver breath." the Chief said. "Now, you & Agent Puppy, go out & stop Snaptrap from my favorite candy store."
Kitty frowns.
"We're on it, Chief." she said.
Then she & Dudley leaves for the candy store.
"Stupid skank!" the Chief sniffs.
Then he takes out a bottle of beer & takes a quick drink.
The audience laughs at this.
At Darran's Candy store.
Snaptrap & his assholes was holding up the place.
Snaptrap was throwing a bunch of candy into a bag.
"Robbing all of the candy from the candy store, was a great idea, boss." Ollie said.
"Thanks, Ollie." Snaptrap said. "I'm gonna eat all of the candy & I won't share with nobody!"
"Hey!" Larry said. "You said, that you would share with me."
Snaptrap turns to Larry & slaps the shit out of him, knocking his glasses off.
The audience laughs.
"I lied. Duh!" Snaptrap said, as he rolls his eyes crazily.
Just then, Kitty & Dudley jumps into the store.
"Not so fast, Snaptrap!" Kitty said, as she pointed her blaster at Snaptrap. "You're not going anywhere!"
Dudley then looks at all of the candy.
"CANDY!" he exclaims, as the audience laughs at his retardedness.
Then he goes over to the candy & starts pigging out.
Kitty rolls her eyes.
"Dudley." she sighs. "Your ass is useless! Looks like, I'm gonna have to stop them by myself. Again!"
Then she runs towards DOOM, with her blaster out.
Snaptrap sees her coming.
"Francisco." he shouted. "Stop her ass!"
"Right." Francisco said, as he took out a black bazooka.
He presses a button & a chain-like rope ties around Kitty tight, making her fall to the floor.
"AHHHHHH!" she hollers.
"Ha!Ha!" Snaptrap laughs. "Looks like, my brand new chain rope is too powerful, for the mighty Kitty Katswell. Ha!Ha!Ha!Ha!"
"Good one, boss!" Asskisser Ollie said.
"Thanks." Snaptrap said. "I come off with a good one, every now & then."
"Asskisser." Francisco & Larry mutters under their breath, as the audience laughs.
"Come on, boss!" Big Dog shouted. "Let's go!"
"SHUT UP!" Snaptrap shouted at Big Dog. "You're not supposed to talk!"
So Big Dog sulked & shut up, as the audience laughs.
"Dudley!" Kitty called out to her partner. "Help!"
Dudley ignores her, as he keeps eating the candy.
The audience laughs at his ass.
"Mmmmmmmmmm! Good candy!" Dudley said as he ate the tasty candy & the audience laughs.
Kitty rolls her eyes.
Then she sees DOOM picking up their bounty.
"Time to get tough!" Kitty shouted.
Then she starts tugging on the chain rope.
"Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!" she said, as she tugs on the chain rope.
Then the chain rope breaks apart.
Kitty was free!
"Ha!" she said, as she turned to DOOM. "I'm free now, you bastards."
"OH SHIT!" DOOM exclaims, as the audience laughs. "She's gonna beat our asses!"
"That's right." Kitty said with a evil smile, as the audience laughs. "Prepare, for your healthy dose of whoop ass! HI-YA!"
Then she does a karate spilt kick, knocking the shit out of Ollie & Francisco, knocking them out cold.
Snaptrap turns to Leather Teddy & Big Dog.
"Get the bitch, assholes!" he shouted.
Then the two background DOOM members, started attacking Kitty with clubs, maces, knives, & anything else to hurt Kitty with.
"YA!" Kitty shouted, as she sends a karate kick to the background villians' hands, knocking the weapons from their hands.
Then she sends several thousand Katswell punches to their faces.
"TAKE THAT, ASSHOLES!" she shouted, as she continues punching the hell out of them.
Leather Teddy & Big Dog was out cold.
Snaptrap turns to Larry.
"Larry. Get Agent Katswell!" he orders.
"What?" Larry asked. "I can't see anything!"
Kitty comes up to Larry & karate chops him in the head.
"HI-YA!" she said, as she delivers the blow.
The audience laughs, as Larry falls to the floor unconscious.
Then Kitty turns to Snaptrap.
"Your ass is mine, Snaptrap." she said.
"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" Snaptrap hollers like a bitch, as Kitty tackles onto him.
"HAAAAAAA!" Kitty shouted, as she gives Snaptrap her ultra brutal Katswell punch to his face. "TAKE THAT, ASSFUCK!"
"AHHHHHHHHH!" Snaptrap cries, as he kept getting punched in the face, head, & stomach by a pissed Kitty.
"SHUT UP, BITCH!" Kitty shouted at the rat, as the audience laughs.
Then she keeps giving him the ultra brutal Katswell punches to the face.
"AHHHHHHHHHHH!" Snaptrap screams, as the audience laughs.
The audience cheers, applaudes, & laughs, as Kitty continues beating the hell out of Snaptrap.
30 minutes later.
Kitty had finished beating the hell out of Snaptrap, as the TUFF police was arresting DOOM.
Snaptrap had a black eye, several missing teeth, & a broken arm.
"I will, plot my revenge!" he shouted, as the TUFF cops threw his ass in the back of the paddy wagon.
"Ah, shut the fuck up!" Kitty sniffed, as the audience laughs.
The candy store owner walks up to Kitty.
"Thank you, Miss." he started. "Thank you, for saving my candy store from those crooks."
"Anytime." Kitty blushes, as the audience laughs.
"At least, you actually stopped them." said the candy store owner. "Unlike that white mutt over there. Who started eating up all of my candy."
Dudley finally stops eating all of the candy.
He burps long & loud, as the audience laughs.
"That was some good candy!" Dudley said, as he picked his teeth with a finger.
The candy store owner walks up to him.
"Hey! Asshole!" he sniffed. "You ate all of my candy!"
"Hey, dude." Dudley started. "Your candy is rockin'!"
"You ate all of my inventory!" the candy store owner shouted. "Now, who's gonna pay me for all that candy!"
"I'll pay for it." Dudley said, as he reached for his wallet.
He takes out his wallet & opens it.
A moth flies out of it & the audience laughs.
Dudley turns to Kitty, with that sad puppy look.
His lips quivered & tears were forming in his eyes.
"Kitty. Please?" Dudley asked, as the audience laughs at his stupidness.
Kitty sighs, as she took out her small black purse.
She turns to the candy store owner.
"How much, sir?" she asks.
"That'll be $700 dollars, please?" the candy store owner said.
"What do you take?" Kitty asked. "Credit cards or checks?"
"Cash." the candy store owner said, as the audience laughs.
Kitty sighs.
"Dudley." she said, as she took out seven $100 dollar bills.
"I'll pay you back, Kitty." Dudley said, with a happy look on his face. "I promise."
"Yeah, whatever." Kitty sniffs, as she gives the candy store owner the money.
"Thank you." the candy store owner said, as he takes the money from Kitty. "That'll cover up damages to my inventory."
"But, that did damage to my wallet." Kitty mutters angrily, as she gave Dudley an evil look.
Dudley looks at her.
"What?" he asks.
Kitty just growled, as the audience laughs at Dudley's retardedness.
Back at TUFF.
Kitty & Dudley was standing in front of everyone, in the Chief's office. They was about to get some medals for stopping Snaptrap, once again.
"Congratulations, Agent Puppy." the Chief said. "You have stopped Snaptrap & DOOM from robbing my favorite candy store."
Then he puts a medal, which was gold & had the words; T.U.F.F. on it.
Everyone applaudes.
Dudley blushes.
"I couldn't have done it alone, Chief." Dudley said.
"Sure, you did." the Chief said.
Kitty looks at the Chief.
"What about me, Chief?" she asks. "Don't I get a medal too?"
"Hell, no." the Chief said.
Kitty look astounded.
"What! But why?" she asks. "I was the one, who did all of the work, like always. And Dudley just ate all of the candy, that was in the store."
The Chief turns to her.
"Kitty. Why didn't your sorry ass do anything to stop the villain?" he shouted. "God! You are the most retarded agent, I ever hired! You're useless & annoying!"
Kitty started sulking, as her ears went down. The very same look, that she had when Snaptrap & Dudley told her, that she can't dance in 'Rat Pack'.
"Now, go & make me some more coffee, Skank!" the Chief finished.
So, getting even more pissed, Kitty goes & make the Chief's coffee, as she cusses under her breath.
"Fuckin', stupid, lazy-ass flea!" she mutters angrily, as the audience laughs at her cussing about the Chief.
The Chief turns to Dudley.
"Agent Puppy." he said, with a smile on his face.
"Yes, Chief?" Dudley asked.
"Do you know, what a raise is?" the Chief asks.
"No." Dudley said. "What is it? Is it something to eat? Is it something to chase? Is it something to chase & then eat it?"
Then he gets on his knees.
"Please say, that it's something to chase & to eat!" Dudley cried, as the audience laughs at his retardedness. "Please!"
The Chief laughs.
"No, son." the Chief started. "It's nothing something to chase after or even eat."
Dudley frowns, as his ears drooped down.
The audience laughs at his sadness.
"But don't fret, son." the Chief said. "I'll tell you, what it is."
Dudley looks at him.
"Okay." he said.
The Chief clears his throat.
"A raise is, a raise in the amount that you get in your paycheck." the Chief explains.
"Oh." Dudley said, as the audience laughs at his stupidness. "So, that what that means."
"Yeah." the Chief said.
"So, you're getting me a raise, Chief?" Dudley asks.
"Hell yeah." the Chief said, as the audience laughs.
"ALRIGHT!" Dudley exclaims happily, as the audience laughs.
Then the Chief turns to everyone.
"Attention, everyone." he shouted.
Everyone looks at him.
"I am giving Agent Puppy a raise, for saving my favorite candy store from DOOM & Snaptrap!" the Chief said.
Then everyone applaudes to this.
Kitty returns with the Chief's coffee.
"Here's your coffee, Chief." she said, as she hands him his coffee mug.
"Yeah, I see it." the Chief sniffs. "There's no need to shove it in my fuckin' face. Just set it, over on the desk, by my chair."
So Kitty sighs, as she sets the Chief's coffee mug on his desk.
"Hey, Kitty." Dudley called out to her.
Kitty turns to him.
"Yes, Dudley?" she asks.
"Guess what?" Dudley asks.
Kitty starts thinking.
"You want me to throw your tennis ball & you chase after it, like a fuckin' moron?" she asks.
"No." Dudley said, as the audience laughs. "But that does sound fun. Remind me, to do that later. Guess again."
"I give up." Kitty admitted. "Tell me."
"The Chief gave me a rise!" Dudley exclaims. "He gave it to me, because I saved his favorite candy store from Snaptrap & DOOM."
"Yep. I sure did." the Chief said as he smiles at Kitty. "Now, go get TUFF some more donuts. Since Dudley is officially, the best agent I ever had now. I let the sucky agent, that's you, to get the donuts for now on. And when you get back, give me a massage."
Kitty was growling & was getting into pure rage levels now.
"YOU SON OF A BITCH!" Kitty shouted, being at ultra rage level now. "I HAVE WORKED AT TUFF FOR YEARS AND I NEVER GOTTEN A RISE, AND DUDLEY HAS ONLY BEEN HERE NOT EVEN A YEAR, AND YOU GIVE HIM ONE!"
"Agent Ka-Ka-Katswell." Keswick said. "Calm down."
"NO!" Kitty shouted. "I'VE BEEN HOLDING ALL OF THIS RAGE IN! I'M SICK & TIRED OF BEING DISRESPECTED AROUND HERE, ALL BECAUSE, DUDLEY LOVES TO HAVE FUN!"
"But, Kitty." Dudley said in a sad voice. "It's not my fault."
Kitty ignores him & goes back to her rage-fueled rant.
"I'M SICK OF BEING IGNORED, GETTING BLOWNED UP, GETTING BURNED, GETTING CUT, & GETTING HURT, ALL BECAUSE, YOU LOVE THAT DOG & RESPECT HIM MORE THAN ME!" Kitty shouted.
"Calm down, Agent Tuna breath." the Chief said. "Alright. I'll have Agent Rooster get the donuts. But you still have to give me a massage."
"OH NO, I'M NOT!" Kitty shouted. "I'M SICK & TIRED OF BEING YOUR GODDAMN SECRETARY! THAT'S TAMMY'S FUCKIN' JOB, NOT MINE'S!"
"Kitty, please?" Dudley pleaded with his partner.
"STAY OUT OF THIS!" Kitty shouted at his, as the audience laughs.
Dudley quickly shuts up.
Everyone stares at her.
"WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU STARIN' AT!" Kitty shouted.
Everyone goes back to doing nothing.
Kitty turns her attention back to the Chief.
"ANOTHER THING. I AM SICK OF TIRED, BEING CALLED A MOTHERFUCKIN' NAME! MY NAME IS KITTY KATSWELL! KITTY KATSWELL DAMMIT! IT'S NOT; MS. BORING. IT'S NOT MS. LAZY OR ANY RETARDED SHIT LIKE THAT & IT'S NOT TUNA BREATH, EITHER! IT'S KITTY KATSWELL!" Kitty shouted.
"Boy, you're no fun." the Chief said.
Kitty went off the scale pissed now, as the audience ooohs in suspense.
"NO FUN! NO FUN!" Kitty shouted. "THIS IS SUPPOSED TO BE A SECRET AGENCY, NOT A FUCKIN' PLAYGROUND! THIS IS SUPPOSED TO BE A FUCKIN' JOB, NOT FUCKIN' PLAYTIME! IT ALWAYS PLAYTIME WITH YOU. I WONDER, HOW A RETARDED, DRUNKEN BUM LIKE YOU, BECAME CHIEF ANYWAYS!"
The Chief was about to answer, but Kitty interrupts.
"SHUT UP!" she shouted at him. "I'M TALKING! I AM SICK & TIRED OF BEING IN THIS FUCKIN' DUMP!"
Then she takes off her badge & takes out her blaster guns.
Dudley had a worried look on his face, as he knew what Kitty was gonna do.
"I don't like the looks of this." he mutters softly.
"YOU'RE A MOTHERFUCKIN', COCK SUCKIN' PIECE OF SHIT!" Kitty started. "I QUIT!"
Then she throws her badge & blaster guns at the Chief.
The badge & blaster guns knocks him into his coffee mug, making the coffee spill onto him.
"AHHHHHHHHHH!" the Chief shouted in pain, as the audience laughs.
Kitty stomps out of the Chief's office & goes to her cubical.
She starts packing up her things & putting them in a box.
"Fuckin', stupid-ass, can't tell time, gettin' drunk all of the damn time, Quacky the Duck watchin' motherfucka!" she shouted.
Soon all of her belongings was in a box.
Then she picks up the box & goes back to the Chief's office.
She kick down the door.
"Oh, and by the way." Kitty started. "I'm gonna start up my very own crime-fighting company. It's gonna be a trillion times better, than this shitty place."
"Yeah, right." the Chief laughs, as he got some bandages on him. "Your little crime-fighting company, will last for about two weeks. Then you'll come back here on your knees, begging for my forgiveness & your job back."
"NO, I WON'T!" Kitty shouted. "My crime-fighting company will blossom & bloom, while you all at TUFF will crash & burn! So long, Herbert Dumbass!"
Then she leaves, the Chief's office, as the audience applaudes to her speech.
"It's Dumbrowski!" the Chief shouted.
Kitty made her way to the exit.
Dudley chases after her.
"Kitty! Wait!" he called out to her.
He grabs her by the legs.
"Please, don't leave TUFF!" he cries. "I'll be lost without you!"
Kitty turns & looks down on him.
Dudley looks up at her, with tears in his eyes.
"Please, don't leave me, Kitty." he said. "We're buddies."
Kitty sighs.
"Dudley." she started in a calm voice. "I know that, but I have to get away from the Chief & his stupidity."
"Maybe things'll get better, if you stay?" Dudley suggested.
Kitty sighs again.
"I doubt, they will, if I stay here, Dudley." she said. "And I have to prove to him & everyone else, that they have just lost the very best agent, that ever worked for TUFF. They will all be sorry, when my crime-fighting company launches off."
"Please, stay." Dudley said, on the verge of tears.
"Sorry, Dudley." Kitty said. "I can't. You can handle everything by yourself."
"Will I ever see you again?" Dudley asks in a sad voice.
"I don't know yet, Dudley." Kitty said, as Dudley let her go. "I must go now."
So, she walks closer to the entrance.
Dudley looks at her & closes his eyes.
"And don't forget t-this." he said, as his voice started breaking up. "I love you, Kitty Katswell. A-Always."
Then he starts bawling like a baby.
Kitty stops in her tracks, when she heard this.
She turns to him & goes back to him.
She put a hand on his shoulder.
"I heard that, Dudley." she said in a soothing & calm voice.
Dudley stops crying & looks at her.
Kitty gives him a weak smile.
"So, do you love me?" Dudley asks, as he sniffs.
"Yes." Kitty whispers.
Dudley smiles a bit.
"But I'm still quitting TUFF." Kitty said. "But you can visit me, every few days."
"Promise, you won't get mad, when I visit you?" Dudley asked, as he sniffed.
"I promise." Kitty said, as she raised her right hand.
"Cross your heart & hope to die?" Dudley asked.
"Cross my heart & hope to die." Kitty said.
"Eat Keswick's mom's blueberry pie?" Dudley asked, as the audience laughs.
The audience laughs at this.
"I'll eat, Keswick's mom's blueberry pie." Kitty started. "And I eat, any other flavors of pies, that she makes."
"Okay, then." Dudley said. "I feel better now."
"So, see you in a few days, Dudley." Kitty said, as she picked up her box & leaves TUFF for the very last time.
Dudley sighs heavily, as he went back to the Chief's office.
Well, that's it for chapter one. What will happen to Kitty? What will happen to TUFF? Will Kitty's new crime-fighting company run TUFF out of business? Will Dudley go out with Kitty even though, she's not working at TUFF no more? Will the Chief's burns heal? Will Tammy do her job? Will the Chief's favorite candy store get more candy? Will Benson make fish? These answers & more in chapter 2. Please read & review!
