The gong rings out and I'm off. I'm running towards the giant golden horn with some others. The more cowardly tributes are running into the vine-tangled arena. My legs are working faster and faster until I reach my destination. I bend down to grab the largest bag I can find. Hopefully it's full of food and camping gear. The Lord knows what might be in that arena.

I'm barreled over by the District Two boy and thrown onto my back with my arms pinned to the ground. Recognizing me, he lets go. "Jewel," he acknowledges me.

"Leo," I say back, but there's no time for catching up or even discussing strategies. People are starting to leave the Cornucopia if they grabbed anything, and the Bloodbath isn't going to be over without me joining in on the fun. I turn around to reclaim my bag when I see the District Nine girl trying to make off with it.

Any sense of excitement I've been feeling since the Games started vanishes, and I'm left with an unruly surge of anger at this girl. That's my bag. I snarl at her and quickly take a knife from Leo's belt. He opens his mouth to protest, but if he does say anything, I'm not paying attention.

I throw the dagger at the girl making off into the woods. It hits her directly in the back, and she immediately drops to the ground. I can't tell if she's dead yet, but if she isn't she can't survive for too long.

All those years of imagining killing and training lead up to that one day when I took the life of a girl from District Nine.

If I could say one thing, it's that no matter how much you anticipate it, nothing compares to the adrenaline at the moment of murder and the guilt afterward.

It's been a few days. I can't believe Leo was killed in the Bloodbath. One moment he was after that Donner from District Twelve, and the next he has a poison dart stuck in his throat.

I tried to go after her, to avenge his death and get her supplies, but she aimed her blow-darts at me, and I didn't dare go near those, so I let her go. Of course, now I'm the laughing stock of the Career pack.

But I wasn't listening. I was just too shocked to see Leo's body on the ground, with no rise and fall of his chest to indicate life. The poison in those darts must be really effective having worked so fast.

I still try to shake the thought of him from my head. It just seems unreal that he's gone, that the Career pack is without a real leader and is reduced to a mere eleven tributes. Leo always seemed so strong. He had scored a ten in training. That was certainly higher than I had gotten. My score had been just barely in the Career range.

"Hey Kill-Zone!" yells the boy from District Four, Marlin. "Are you hunting or are you dawdling?"

Kill-Zone. What a lovely nickname.

Watching an ally die can't be as bad as watching a friend or relative die, but it must be a close second.

It feels so odd to know you had someone you could trust and work with, but you don't have them anymore.

Because they're dead.

I watch as the five other Careers left corner the boy from District Twelve. He doesn't stand a chance unless they come at him one at a time. And, being boys with the brain capacity of a walnut, they do.

Marlin charges at him with his trident, and the District Twelve kid dodges it easily. He comes at him again, yelling a battle cry this time. Yeah, why don't you just alert everyone within a five mile range there's a battle going on and whoever wins is probably going to be injured?

Soon enough, our opponent becomes bored with dodging and takes the offensive. He grabs out his sharp-tipped weapon and plunges it right into Marlin's heart. His death is immediate, but the cannon doesn't make a sound for another moment.

Next, the other boy from District Four steps up to try his luck at killing the tribute, but he's not very old, nor is he very experienced, so it doesn't take long for the next cannon to ring out through the air.

The boy from District Two who is still alive confidently draws his weapon and steps towards the District Twelve boy. For a while, I actually have confidence in this boy, until he makes a careless mistake. He falls for a feigned jab, and drops his weapon which could also be used as a shield to that side, and the District Twelve boy is quick about switching which hand his weapon is in. A slash to the side is his end.

The two District One boys are smarter than the rest. They both come to attack him at once, making him clearly outnumbered, but he still has an advantage, for the two District One boys fight with their fists. The first manages to catch his attention and irritation during most of the battle, though, and he gets it first.

But the death has managed to distract the District Twelve tribute long enough for the other District One boy, Spark, to grab him from behind and put him in his signature headlock. I'm sure this is the end for the tribute, but he manages to throw him off balance and Spark is only able to maybe break his jaw.

This kid must know a lost cause when he sees one, because he's off out of the clearing and heading for the thicket of trees. I'm thinking perhaps I should make the final blow when Spark has him pinned to the ground, but I see behind him the ever so slight rustle of bushes.

I squint to try and see closer. I can just make out who it is. It's that Donner girl, the one who killed Leo.

I want to help my fellow Career; I really do, but by the time his cannon is off my feet have already carried me far away.

I'm not proud of what I did.

I could never be proud of abandoning an ally in his time of need.

There was just something intimidating about this Donner girl.

There was something about her that just screamed at me STAY AWAY!

Tonight when the anthem is playing they show the Donner girl's face up in the sky along with the boy from District Seven.

I shrug it off. This means there's one less opponent in the arena. There are now only three tributes left in these Games.

There's heavy breathing on the back of my neck. Someone's ready to attack. I turn around with my knife drawn. A slit in the boy's throat is made. I stand above him while he chokes on his own blood for a moment, and then his eyes glaze over.

His cannon goes off. That was the District Nine boy. I've killed both of their tributes.

Needless to say, District Nine is not going to be a happy place when I win.

I'd like to say I always held respect for the Donner girl.

Even though she killed two of my fellow Careers, there was hope for her yet.

She was the kind of girl that, if she didn't have a weapon in her hand, you wanted to get to know.

She was a worthy opponent.

I cry out as the District Twelve boy sticks his knife in my eye. I blink in confusion and back up in fear before I regain my senses. I growl and stick the axe I collected from the District Nine boy at him.

It hits him straight in the stomach and he falls to his knees on the edge of cliff. I smile almost psychotically. This is going to be an easy win. I take the liberty to throw the axe at him. He ducks. So he hasn't changed from the last time we almost encountered.

The axe flies over his head and down the crevice of the cliff. But that's fine with me. Maybe he thinks he can outlive me, but that's a last resort. My only major injury is to the eye. That's all I have. And what does he have? A huge cut in the stomach, that's what he has.

I'm sure I won. I considered everything, or at least I think I did. No, wait, I did not consider everything.

I most definitely did not consider my axe flying straight back towards my head.

Maybe it's better that I'm dead.

After all, the memories are hard to bear now, but dealing with them alive…

So congratulations Haymitch Abernathy, victor of the 50th annual Hunger Games.

I don't know how you can live with yourself.