Author Notes:
Italicize : inner thoughts or dreams or past events
timelines: Current time, junior year 2010/2011, past includes year 2008-2010( freshmen year to sophomore)
Lead Characters: Rachel Berry, Quinn Fabray, Marrissa Cooper,Noah Puckerman.
Present:2010(week before christmas break)
Q PoV:
[somewhere in WMHS]
Taking my books and forcefully closing my locker shut. i cannot focus, I need quite space to think. looking around i find my way to auditorium as discreetly as possible i don't want anyone following me or spying on me. It used to be my safe haven when pressure was too much to handle, being popular is too much to handle sometime I'm tired of faking everything. Finally locating my seat, near back end of auditorium at the corner. Sometime darkness is good for you, i shut my eyes to forget about everything. After a minute or two i open my eyes again hoping it was a dream and hoping She will start singing anytime now only to find empty stage. You see the irony of situation, you feel empty and alone and darkness inside you.
You wonder who come up with statement ignorance is bless , it's not. You know it's not, if only you knew what you did and why you did it a couple of months ago. If only you had a friend who would have help you realize the truth. You mournfully smile at thought of friend, you don't have friend, they are just your lackeys. Everyone want something from you, well, not everyone, She just wanted to be a friend, a friend who you really needed even when you didn't realize at the time. You hate yourself more than others now, you hate who you become, Fake. But you can't do anything about it, popularity change you.
After a min of wallowing in misery, you get up and turn. You find puck just couple of seat away looking into stage, you know what he's thinking about. He's been down since the beginning of the year, at first you thought he's upto his sleazy way to get girls to fall into whole emotional, distressed and nice guy. You know his home situation is not ideal. You don't find him in party or hit on other girls these days.
"hey Quinn, didn't expect you to be here" you heard puck.
"what are you doing here puck?" you ask calmly. you are afraid he'll figure you out.
"nothing much, just thinking ." puck replies.
You wonder if puck is thinking about her too. Glee is not Glee anymore, it's not as fun as it was last year. you know everyone feel same ever since She left, but nobody dare to say anything. You have been watching puck closely since last two week, ever since he left when Santana started mouthing her off again and puck just lost his cool. He stop coming to glee, but you know how much he used to love it even if he pretended to be there just to increase his reputation.
You want to know what he's planning, you know he is going to find rachel one way or another. Ever since Rachel left he's helping other to stay clear of slushies and any kind of bullying.
"What are you planning?" you ask him
"what the hell are you talking about?"
"I know you are after rachel" you say slightly agitated.
"so? "
"I want to know what you find" you tell him.
"why? so you can go there and make her life hell again?" he angrily replies. "you stay away from rachel, you should be happy you know, you won. you got what you wanted" He's about to leave when you call again.
"puck" with the way your voice sound, puck turn to see your somber face and wait for your reply. " i need to find rachel, i need rachel to forgive me, i can't pretend anymore" , you discreetly wipe away tear in your eye. "She didn't deserve what I did to her, please help me find her". you plead.
puck turn towards you and He's looking into your eyes, trying to find the truth behind your words.
"do you really mean it?" "or is this some messed up game you cook?"
You are not happy the way people just assume everything about you, you know you can't be mad at puck, He's just tell you what everyone see's in you, what you have shown others all this time. you can't control your sorrow, you wipe your tears away again, your voice is very timid and vulnerable
"I'm not some heartless ice queen as everyone make it to be puck, I'm not. I was good at pretending." you look into his eye again, "it's been months puck, i cannot pretend anymore. i tried to rationalize what I did, I tried everything to forget about my actions. She left because of me, do you know how I feel now? "
he's about to say something but you stop him with raised hand, "I've been watching rachel on that stage ever since she's in McKinley, from the start of the year i'm sitting on that same chair hoping to find rachel on that stage, hoping it was just bad dream and she is there on stage just like all those times before" You are trying to control your tears now. You never spoke to anyone about how you feel.
"I know" puck replies, you are shock to say the least, puck start again.
"I know, me too" he repeats.
"I want to trust you on this fabray, She deserve to be happy. She was not. Glee was suppose to be family, Sometime i want to punch shue in his face and put fire in his hair"
You chuckles with puck's imagination, you wonder how happy coach sue will be if puck actually did it.
"Asshole always said about family and helping each other, but he never supported her when everyone was on her throat in Glee", he's cooling off, "all she wanted was to be part of it and make us all better"
"being part of something special make you special" you repeat what rachel says about year ago.
"I'm going to speak with Mr. Berry after school, my mom say they'll be back in time for Christmas holidays" you wonder if rachel celebrate Christmas as you heard puck.
"can i come with you?" i ask
"sure, but i don't expect rachel to be there to be honest" you wait for his explanation." Rachel studying in some private boarding school now, i tried to speak with rachel during 1st week of school, but Mr. berry said she won't be back till Christmas break"
You feel bit better knowing at least there is possibility rachel will be back. You are ready to leave as you hear student wondering around auditorium , but before you go out you hug puck.
"thanks puck, i want to change, please trust me on this"
[Few hours later]
Qpov:
I shut my car close as i walk out towards drive way, puck already there waiting for me. I'm anxious, puck press the button and i can hear doorbell inside. He look back at me and say "let me talk to them". You just nod. You don't know what to expect, you don't know what would you do if rachel open the door.
Door opens, Mr berry open it slowly , the shorter one. he look at puck
"Noah, how are you, it's been while since we meet with you and ruth" says Mr. berry.
"Good i guess, our team's getting better so that something to cheer for right?" puck says with smile on his face, you wonder if Mr. berry visit McKinley football .
"Yes, that one way to look at, what you doing outside, common in..." he finally notice you as he slow down from his thoughts.
"this is Quinn, we are in glee together.." puck starts to explain, you notice Mr. berry thinking face, you wonder if he know what you did to rachel all this time.
"Hello, Hiram berry" He introduce himself with handshake, "Common in guys, its cold outside" as he let us in, "lets seat in living room, I'll bring something to drink, what would you like?"
"no thanks" puck replies, you whisper "thanks you"
you look around walls, you see couple of paintings on one wall, you keep on looking. You always admired painting and arts in general. you draw every now and then. You find family picture on wall near to stairs. You see Rachel's childhood in those picture. you imagine rachel childhood to be happy, she looks happy and smiling in most of the pictures. You see all three of them post outside Broadway theatre. you look back and see puck looking at you. You go back to sit on coach next to puck as Mr. berry comes with tray with treats and some juice.
"So what you bring you guys here" Mr berry ask.
"school is over for now, was hoping to see if rachel back" pucks replies.
Mr. berry sighs, and say "May be next week, rachel want to spend some time in school. I told her to come back as soon as school finish for holidays, but you know rachel if she want to do something she doesn't budge"
"what so great about that school, who want to spend that much time in school" pucks replies casually. you wonder how puck is so familiar with Mr. Berry.
"I'm sure you wouldn't considering you skip half the time, but she says she made some friend and they are bonding over break or something girls do these days, I'm sure quinn would understand" Mr. berry replies.
You just nod then shake your head and replies " I'm not sure, we barely get any break with all cheer practice." you explain again, " coach made us attain optional "mandatory" practice during break and by the week time we just want to enjoy our days without worry about cheer practice".
"That something, remind me of rachel, she always wanted to go to her dance lesson and voice lesson during break". you can see smile on his face as he think about the memory.
"anyway she will be back after week time, she's spending some time with girls over at school. You might catch her outside school, they relax curfews during break" says Mr. berry
"may be we should try coffee shop near school" pucks says looking at me. Before you say anything Mr. Berry replies
"I didn't expect you come Noah, i expected that tall boy what was his name again"
Puck replies" Finn"
"So what's this really about Noah?" "I know you were close when you both went to temple years ago but I thought you grow apart" you turn towards puck quickly, you wonder how close were they, you thoughts were interrupted by Mr. berry "and forgive me for asking but I don't recall rachel saying anything about you" Mr. berry speaks to you.
"we are all in glee, i know we all kinda fight against each other but we were like family. Its only time we feel comfortable." you try to explain. you feel like he is controlling his emotion. You wonder what he knows about rachel school life.
"we miss her" puck say "Glee doesn't feel great anymore, i was hoping to talk with rachel and just talk about school and stuff, and quinn said she wanted to come too"
"so, only two people out eleven member?" Mr. berry ask. you realize he probably know everything about rachel school life.
"we just wanted to see rachel without telling other, i'm sure other would have come with us too" you replies. You see Mr. berry looking at you. Finally he relents and say " you may catch rachel in coffee shop near school she can't go without coffee. They were suppose to go out today, "trip down the lane" as she says it"
"Can you give us her number, her old number doesn't seem to work" you say politely.
"we cancel her old number when she received lot of inappropriate and cruel messages." Mr. berry replies, He is getting angry, you can tell, you speak again " I wanted to file complaint but rachel didn't want to, she just ask us to get new one." you keep your face void of emotion, you know it's your message.
"sorry guys, she ask not to give it to anyone unless she share it herself" he seems to be controlling his emotion.
"okay i think we'll try to find rachel near coffee shop, may be visit sometime next week" pucks says as he stand up. you stand as well.
"take it easy on road Noah, next time bring ruth and sarah with you will you, it's been while since you all came"
" sure, Mom wanted to visit during holidays, you know how she's with rachel and sarah too" pucks say. You wonder what puck's mom think of rachel, she probably want puck and rachel to get married. that's so wrong in so many level, why does rachel need to marry some guy, she doesn't need one. just because puck is jewish doesn't mean he was right to marry rachel, why can't Christian marry a jew, they are so many celebrity with different faith who get married. Rachel will be celebrity too. your inner thoughts goes to all the places with rachel future you wonder where you will fit in that future. Mr. berry interrupt your thought when he ask you something.
"...i'm sure rachel would love to see you again, i know we haven't met before it's probably because of our work schedule, you are welcome to come by.." you realize he invites you when rachel get back from school. you just nod.
Puck say his goodbye, you watch Mr berry hugging puck, you are jealous of him, you know deep down puck is good guy with bad attitude and Mr. berry probably see only good part, you hate that he is close to berry family. And you are just someone who cause their daughter to get away from home, away from family. Your mood turn bad again thinking about your past behavior.
You are near puck's truck already waiting for him. you ask him when he is close. "what now?"
"let's go, you drink coffee right?" he ask
"sure" you reply.
" But you gotta drop your car" "okay" you reply.
[Few minutes later]
You reach nearest coffee shop to the Dalton school, you didn't know rachel goes to dalton now, you assume Mr. berry told puck, You know its prestigious private school.
Puck open door for you and go to take coffee after asking what i like. You wonder when he learn to be considerate, probably rachel made him do this during week they "dated", wonder why they stop. probably puck push for sex and she decline. It will be difficult to wait till 25 to have sex for someone like puck, I can wait though I mean I never wanted to have sex with puck or finn or any boys for that matter.
"..brunette, like this tall.." you see puck gesturing with hand to show rachel height to waiter,
"ya, i remember, she comes by every weekends with her friends, two blonde and some guy. Do you know those girls man? they are super hot. I tried to ask for blonde's number but the brunette chick cut me off and warn me not to "fraternize with customer" something , I didn't get what she meant but with way she was looking at me I just back off" waiter tells pucks stories, probably of rachel, who would warn someone with those words.
"ya, that's probably rachel" pucks says
"she probably will be back in minutes, it's like clockwork man she always comes around 6pm with those three"
"let's sit puck, we'll wait" you stop waiter and tell puck
"thanks dude, later" you and puck find seat on corner near window
"ya put some good word for me man, coffee on me" you hear from that sleaze again. you want to lash out at him but you ignore him.
"why do you act like such sleaze in school puck? I don't get it." you wondered out loud looking at puck.
"Probably same reason you act like a bitch, no offense" you hear his reply.
he tells you about his childhood , about his deadbeat dad and his anger issue after that and how he grow apart from rachel. You realize they were close. you remember some of your early memory during your lucy phase, how rachel used to be nice to you when nobody was. how those two were like always together.
You get out of your thoughts when you hear rachel laugh from outside. then door bell chime, you turn towards door, you see some blonde girl, similar height to yours enter first holding door as she talks "...then we break into house, wait, technically its not breaking since it was incomplete, my friend slash neighbor mom's was in real estate business, anyway, we never did those sort of things.." she keeps on talking, you don't listen because you see rachel enter along with some other blonde and finally a guy with bow tie. you stop breathing as you see rachel smiling wildly listening to the story. They reach counter and guy order coffee with hand gesture and mouthing "same".
"wow, i never did anything like that crazy although, last year I hosted a party and it was wild if I take Noah's word for it, I'm not sure because i don't remember at the time.." then she slow you know why she slow down. ".. anyway it will probably feel great doing things you are not suppose to do, i can understand that, going out of your comfort zone and all.." they continue their talk as they sit on booth. You don't like that the fact that the taller blonde led rachel inside the booth and sit too close to rachel, touching rachel fingers and fore arm while gesturing. you look at puck to see his reaction, he seems to be happy with slow smile on his face as rachel finish her story.
".. can't believe we won't be doing this in next few days, Jenny you are lucky since you are from new york and new york can never be bad" rachels say.
"well as much as i like new york, i hate it just as much you know. Not the whole family union thing, Dad will probably want to spend whole time with me and dan too, i'd invite you to new york but your dads probably won't let you go, maybe you should try for new years eve, you to marissa and blaine you too, it will be fun" the shorter blonde " jenny says.
Listening to them you realize they seems very close, rachel seems to like them as well. rachel starts again
"i so want to go there but probably dad will say no" then add with glint in her eye " or maybe i'll get dads to come with me, i will fake cry, you know i can cry on demand, i've been practicing it" then she turn towards other blonde next to her " what about you marissa?" you don't like the way rachel says marissa like she's some sort of queen or something and looking with some emotion.
"i don't think mom would let me go anywhere, long story, she doesn't trust me"
As you hear marissa's reply rachel eye fall on puck, you see rachel smile shift you see puck smiling as well, then you see towards rachel and find rachel looking at you and her face morph into emotionless, smile leaving her face. puck stand and slowly walk towards rachel you follow behind.
"..mom won't me let out of sight...rach?" you hear marissa stop with her story and looks at rachel then back towards you.
"Noah.." rachel whisper, her eye watch puck then you.
A/N:
It's my first story, and english is not my native language, so take it easy with mistakes. I'd appreciate help with story, your opinions, reviews and critics. Anyone who like to beta read and write are welcome, just contact via PM or review.
Character includes are from other show as well, guess which one.
Story will follow season 1 but with faberry twist, so no "quick" storyline. May include some story plot from glee S1,2,3 but mostly it's going to be different. Same with my OC, may or may not follow original show storyline.
Story is about faberry, but there will be some puckleberry and quick friendship, some marissa-rachel story line. Finn won't be like show finn, he'll be better after season 2 plot line, he'll grow up. Puck is definitely bigger part of the story. Brittana won't be the focus of the story, but santana will be negative role.
Final note, Story will go back and forth in timeline, so watch out. Also companion piece to this story, a future fic "fairytale" will be posted soon. Both stories will run parallel, so take pressure off continues updates and writer block.
