Author's Note: Today is my birthday, and what better way to celebrate than by re-posting this utterly ridiculous bit of birthday-themed smut that I wrote a few months ago? :) Don't blame me for this. Blame the textsfromthe12th tumblr feed and the person who prompted this on the castlefanficprompts blog. ;)
Prompt: (from textsfromlastnight/textsfromthe12th) "He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this." Set during early S5.
"Stop. Please, stop, I need a break." Kate lifted a leg and pressed her foot against her lover's chest, pushing him away.
Castle reluctantly pulled his fingers out of her with an obscene wet sound. "Okay. But I'm just getting started."
"I can't take any more right now, Castle. Give me a few minutes." She clamped her thighs together tightly, just in case.
"Of course." He got off the bed and reached for a tissue to wipe his hand, pulled his boxers back on. "But not too long. We're on a deadline here."
Kate slumped on his bed, staring at him. "You cannot be serious about this."
"Of course I'm serious. It's your birthday present! One orgasm per year of your life. And we are not leaving this house until we're finished."
"Finished is right! I might not survive this," she groaned. "I don't think thirty-three orgasms in a single day is even physically possible."
"Oh, sure it is," he chirped brightly. "The maximum ever recorded in a laboratory setting was a hundred and thirty-four in an hour, so this is nothing."
Kate's mouth fell open. "Why am I not surprised that you've done the research?" she muttered, shaking her head. "But Castle, you could have at least given me some warning."
"And ruin the surprise?" His wide-eyed look of outrage was almost comical. "No way."
"But it would have given me a chance to pre-" She stopped abruptly in mid-sentence, sitting up as a realization struck. "Oh my god. Is this why you made me eat that massive bowl of spaghetti last night? And the pancakes this morning?"
"Carb-loading," he shrugged as if it were the most obvious thing in the world. "Gotta keep your strength up for the long haul."
"You are unbelievable," she breathed, flopping back onto the bed and staring at the ceiling, trying to hold back a grin. He was just so ridiculous.
Castle sat down next to her, sliding a big warm hand up her leg. "Kate..."
"No. I'm still on my break." She pushed his hand away. He pouted.
"You can't tell me you haven't enjoyed it so far. I've already made you come nine times this morning, so we're well on our way."
It was true, she had been enjoying it. And she hadn't suspected a thing, at first. At this early point in their relationship, they both pretty much wanted sex all the time anyway, so it hadn't seemed too unusual when he woke her with a hand slipping between her legs and lips on her ear, whispering "Happy birthday" as he worked her up with his fingers. And then his tongue. And then a round of intercourse in the bed followed by more in the shower. Up until then, she hadn't thought anything was out of the ordinary. But when he pulled her back onto the bed after the shower, that's when things had started to get a little weird.
"Okay, the first nine were good." She corrected herself quickly, grinning a little. "Really good. Amazing." Seeing a self-satisfied smirk spread across his face, and his mouth beginning to open on some undoubtedly smart-ass remark, she went on quickly, "But that's enough for now, really."
"Nope." He shook his head stubbornly. "We can't stop now. We're off to such a good start."
She groaned. "I'm not going to talk you out of this, am I? I need some water." She swung her legs over the other side of the bed and reached for his robe. Slinging the dark brown silk over her body, she moved toward the door. "Wouldn't want to get dehydrated..."
Castle followed behind her as she padded through his living room and over to the kitchen. "Good idea. We should take some extra water into the bedroom." He opened cabinets, looking for a pitcher. "We only have twenty-four orgasms to go, and we have to meet your dad for dinner at seven, which means we should leave here at six-thirty, and allowing half an hour to recover and get ready, that means we need to be done by six." He checked the clock. "It's ten now, so that's eight hours, so three orgasms per hour. No problem!" He gave her a cheery grin and a wink, turning to fill the pitcher.
Beckett slid onto a stool, sipping at her glass of water. "Really," she deadpanned. "Three per hour for the whole day, and only half an hour to recover? And what do you propose to tell my dad when he asks how we've spent our day off?" She almost choked on her water at the way Castle's head whipped around, the horrified expression on his face. "For that matter, Castle, what am I supposed to say when he asks what gift you gave me, on my first birthday since we got together?"
He stared at her, mental wheels turning frantically. "I...I didn't think about that."
Kate ducked her head, burying her face in the glass, trying not to burst out laughing. "Clearly you were overly focused on other parts of the planning process."
"Okay. Okay. It's fine." He recovered, straightening his shoulders. "I'll think of something. I am a master storyteller, after all." Then he turned to face her, narrowing his eyes. "And don't think you can change the subject, Katherine Beckett. Finish your water and get yourself back into the bedroom."
She met his gaze and held it with her own as she drained the glass and stood up from the stool. "Maybe you should grab the whipped cream while we're here," she suggested, using that low throbbing voice that always got him excited. She smiled a little at the way his eyes lit up.
"Really? You're not going to argue any more?" His hand fumbled eagerly for the fridge door.
"Oh, what's the point? It's my birthday. I might as well enjoy it." Slowly she undid the sash of his robe from around her waist, slipped the silk off her shoulders, and let it pool on the floor. She sauntered back over to the office door, paused, looked back. Quirked an eyebrow. "I'm ready whenever you are, lover boy."
Somewhat to her surprise, it was true. Despite the ridiculous scenario and the fact that she had already climaxed nine times (nine! in one morning!), her body was thrumming. Her nipples were tight and tingling, drawing Castle's eyes as he hurried to join her, the pitcher of water in one hand, canister of whipped cream in the other.
"God, you're gorgeous," he whispered, hastily setting the pitcher on his desk. "Come here."
"I thought we were going into the bedroom?" she smirked as he drew her close.
"We need some variety. It'll make things go faster..." His voice trailed off as he sprayed a generous dollop of whipped cream over one breast, making her gasp at the cold.
"Castle-"
"Ohh yes." Eagerly he lowered his head to devour the sweet treat, sweeping his tongue over the sensitive flesh underneath. His hand curled under her thigh and lifted her leg around his hip, pulling her naked groin against his leg. Sitting back on the edge of his desk, pulling her along with him, he sprayed more cream on her other breast and went to work, rolling his thigh into her in time with the twists of his tongue around her nipple. She threw her head back and let out a deep moan, grinding herself onto him until her whole body shuddered.
He lifted his head, whipped cream flecking the corners of his mouth. "Did you..."
She blushed a little. "Number ten."
"Wow, Beckett. That was fast." He dipped his hand down into her wetness and watched her twitch and squirm. "Again? Really?"
"Harder. Now. Harder," she gasped, gripping his shoulder. Her fingernails dug into his flesh but he didn't even wince, pushing two fingers into her roughly, working his thumb against her in tight hard circles. It only took another moment before she tensed and shuddered again.
Castle withdrew his fingers and licked them briefly, grinning. "Eleven. See how easy? We're already a third of the way there."
Kate slumped against his body, limp. "Yeah, but will I even be able to walk at the end of this?"
He laughed, kissing her forehead. "I'll carry you to the restaurant if I have to."
She rolled her eyes. "My hero."
"But really, if you don't want to do this-"
"No." She pushed a piece of hair back from his forehead, smiling affectionately. "We're in this now. We'll see it through." She brushed her lips across his. "It might even be fun."
He brightened. "As long as you're sure."
"I am." She moved to push away from him, but paused, feeling how the front of his boxers pressed against her hip. "Oh, Castle." Her hand dropped down to cover the bulge, rubbing softly. "How many orgasms have you allocated to yourself during the course of this exercise?"
"'Allocated'? You know I love it when you talk dirty." He grabbed her wrist and pulled her hand away from him. "But I need to conserve my resources."
She shook him off and replaced her hand on him. "You said it yourself, Castle, we need some variety." Abandoning subtlety, she shoved her hand inside the boxers and wrapped around him. "I think I need you inside me for number twelve."
He pressed his face into the crook of her neck, groaning. She smiled to herself. Those words I need you inside me never failed to get him worked up. She pushed his boxers to the floor and stroked him steadily, up and down the length of the shaft until he was thrusting into her hand, his tongue and teeth moving against the skin of her neck.
"You're killing me, woman."
"The feeling is mutual," she laughed breathlessly, using her other hand to tug at his bicep. "Come on, stud. Let's go to the bedroom. Bring the whipped cream."
Two hours later, they broke for lunch, and as they ravenously devoured their sandwiches, Castle checked the clock again. "Seventeen at noon, we're halfway there already. We're ahead of schedule."
"Overachiever," she teased. "So, what's your plan for the second half? More variety?"
He focused carefully on his food, snuck a glance up at her. "Um. I was thinking of maybe trying your handcuffs."
"Oh," she breathed, her throat suddenly dry. She reached for her water glass. He watched her quietly.
"I mean, if you want to." He waited until she looked up at him. "You don't have to."
"I know."
"It's just," he cleared his throat, "I know we've only tried it once, but well. You seemed to like it. A lot."
"Yeah." She felt the blush creeping up her throat. "I did."
"And I don't know if you remember, because you were kind of out of it by the end, but you had kind of a lot of orgasms that night." He couldn't quite keep the smug grin off his face. "I think it was eight. I mean, not that I was counting."
She laughed, a little shakily. "Oh, you were totally counting, Castle."
He ducked his head. "Busted. So, uh...?"
She held out her glass. "Pour me some more water. I think I'm gonna need it."
By midafternoon they were both starting to tire. Kate pushed Castle's face away from her crotch, not for the first time, and clamped her legs together again. "I need another break, Castle. I don't know if I can make it."
"Sure you can." He slid up beside her on the bed and gathered her in against his body, cuddling her snugly. "We're almost there, Kate. Only six more to go."
"It has been kind of fun. I never would have thought we'd make it this far," she admitted ruefully, rubbing her wrists, which were still a little sore from the handcuffs.
"We can do anything we set our minds to!" Castle pronounced grandly, waving his arm in a sweeping gesture. She snorted and rolled her eyes.
"After this you'll be lucky if I let you touch me for a week," she teased, slapping his chest lightly. He widened his eyes in mock dismay.
"You wouldn't! You'd cut me off, just for wanting to help you celebrate your birthday? Cruel woman."
"It's definitely a birthday I'll never forget, I'll give you that," she said, softening. She leaned in and kissed him tenderly. He pulled her even closer in, his mouth moving gently on hers. He didn't even try to deepen the kiss or caress her - he just let his hand rest lightly on her waist - but even still, within a few minutes of slow soft kisses, her hips were beginning to swivel against him.
"Rick," she whispered into his lips.
"Yeah?"
"Touch me."
"I am touching you." He wriggled his fingers on her hip to prove it.
"You know what I mean. Come on."
"I thought you were on a break." He kissed her again, and again.
"Break's over," she panted, her breasts bouncing lightly. "Touch me now. Slow. Please."
He sucked in a quick heated breath. "Okay. Anything." His hand slipped leisurely across her hip and between her legs. He stroked her slowly, gently. She writhed underneath him, shiny with sweat, moaning deeply.
"Oh, yes. Yes." She tensed and arched her back, pressing herself up into his hand, then fell back onto the bed again.
He kissed her temple, her cheek. "Five more to go."
Gasping, she twisted toward him and took another deep kiss from his mouth. "Let's move to the bathtub for the last few."
The bathwater had cooled to lukewarm around their overheated bodies. Beckett lay back against Castle's chest, the water rippling across her breasts. He lowered his mouth to her neck again.
"Last one, Kate. How do you want it?" He pressed a kiss into her damp skin and then leaned aside slightly, reaching to twist the knob and add some more hot water.
When he turned to settle back into position against the end of the tub, Kate was moving in his arms, sliding forward, turning herself around to face him.
"I want you with me," she murmured softly, slipping her hand under the surface of the water, finding him half-hard against his belly. She stroked him firmly, smiling as they watched each other's faces. "I want you inside me."
"I thought you'd never ask," he teased breathlessly. He rose up onto his knees and pressed Kate back against the other end of the tub, settling himself between her legs. His hands gripped her knees, pushing them wider apart and up toward her breasts. Slowly he slid his thick erection into her under the water.
"Ohh Castle. Oh god, I don't think I can." She twisted her hips and groaned, her inner muscles clenching in tired protest.
"You can. Just let me." He drew out again, slowly, and pushed back in again, slowly. Water sloshed around them. She moaned. He did it again, and again, ever so slowly building up the tension until she was clutching desperately at his slippery wet shoulders, her head thrashing back and forth, whimpers escaping her throat almost continuously.
"Come on, Kate. Come for me now, one last time." He sped up slightly, thrusting harder and faster now, reaching one hand between them to rub her in just the right spot. Like a tidal wave, her climax shuddered through her, drawing a long cry of pleasure that pushed him over the edge also, his thrusts faltering as he spilled out inside her.
Collapsing against the side of the tub, he brushed wet hair off her forehead and leaned over to kiss her cheek. "Happy birthday, Kate."
She gave him a lazy, heavy-lidded smile. "This was definitely your craziest idea yet, Castle."
He wrapped an arm around her shoulders. "...Too crazy?"
"Nah." She snuggled against his chest, water lapping at them. "Just about right. But it's a damn good thing I have a few more months to figure out what I'm going to do for your birthday."
"Katie! Happy birthday," Jim Beckett exclaimed with a smile as his daughter strode into the restaurant, her partner close behind. "Rick, good to see you. And right on time."
"Jim. Nice to see you too."
"Hi Dad." Kate leaned in for a hug, and then he pushed her back, holding her at arm's length so he could look at her. His Katie looked so much better these days. Not as frighteningly thin as those first weeks after her shooting. Not as pinched and stressed as she had looked all of last year. The bags under her eyes were gone. She looked happy.
"It's so nice to see you looking well," he murmured, not wanting to embarrass her, but feeling a need to express some of the relief he felt when he saw her nowadays. "You're really glowing."
She blushed, looking away. "Thanks, Dad." She sat down a little too quickly, and Jim almost missed the expression of pain that briefly flashed across her face before she smiled up at him again. He noticed that Rick wasn't meeting either of their eyes either.
"Everything okay?"
"Oh yeah. Yes. Great," Katie said, a little too quickly, but firmly. She and Rick exchanged a look, and it seemed almost like they were both trying not to laugh.
Jim decided not to ask. Some things, a dad didn't need to know.
