Oh look, my account is still alive! This is my first time writing a Marauder era fic. I hope you like it.
Disclaimer: I only wish I was J.K. Rowling
"Ah well, Moony can fix it again," Sirius muttered looking down at the door he had just blasted open. Remus followed him inside.
"Must you always blast the hinges when you come over?" Remus said with a roll of his eyes. "Reparo"
"Prongs! Just the man I was looking for!" Sirius exclaimed, ignoring Remus' earlier comment. James looked up from where he was staring at his feet but made no move to get off the couch and greet his friends.
"What, no 'hello' for your old pals?" Sirius asked.
"Hello"
"What's wrong with you, Prongsie boy?"
"Nothing. Go home Sirius."
Sirius gasped in mock horror. "He called me Sirius! Something's definitely wrong here."
"I don't think he wants the company right now, Sirius," said Remus.
"Sure he does! He always wants my company! Ickle Jamesie is probably just nervous about his wedding tomorrow."
"I am not nervous!"
"Ah finally he says something. Worried then?"
James gave no reply.
"Anxious? Troubled? Apprehensive? Bothered? Stop me. I can go on."
"Enough, Sirius. So, James, what's the problem?" Remus asked sitting beside his friend on the couch.
"Nothing. Where's Wormtail?"
"Haven't a clue. Said something about being busy. Probably just asleep as usual. Don't change the subject. What's got you all despondent?" said Sirius reclining on the couch on James' other side.
There was silence. Finally, James let out a sigh.
"What if she decides she doesn't want to marry me after all? What if she just doesn't turn up tomorrow and I'm left there like an idiot?"
Remus looked like he was about to speak but Sirius beat him to it.
"Of course she won't. This is Evans we're talking about. When has she ever broken a promise?"
"Well then what if I forget what to say and I end up a babbling idiot?" it seemed a dam had broken and all his fears came spewing forth.
"First of all, you are an idiot. Everyone knows that so stop worrying about it. Secondly, that's why the minister asks you to repeat after them" Remus told him.
"Don't muggles usually have wedding rehearsals the day before? If you're so worried about messing up, why don't we have a practice wedding?" Sirius suggested.
"The wedding is tomorrow. We can't have a spur of the moment rehearsal right now. It's too complicated to get everyone together at the last moment," Remus reasoned.
"Not to mention I'll look like an idiot when everyone finds out that it was called for because I might mess up tomorrow," James put in.
"Since when did you care so much about looking like an idiot? Anyway, we can have a rehearsal right here! Just you, me, Moony and Evans. I'll even pretend to be the minister for you because I'm such a great friend!" Sirius said.
"Lily's probably busy doing girly things brides are supposed to do the day before their wedding," James mumbled.
"Nonsense. I'll go get her!" Sirius said. He marched off, determinedly blasting the hinges off the door again before his two companions could say anything.
"Don't bother repairing it just yet. He'll just knock the door off again when he comes back with Lily," said Remus when James drew his wand.
Within five minutes Sirius was back dragging a confused Lily by the arm. "Redu– oh look, they left the door open."
"They didn't leave it open. You must've taken out the hinges again when you left," an irate Lily said.
"How do you know I did it?"
"You're the only one I know who doesn't use doorknobs like a normal civilized person. Hello James, Remus, would either of you explain to me why Black apparated into my parents' garden, blasted the back door open an proceeded to yell that I was needed here because there was an 'idiot groom emergency'?" Lily asked.
"Well you see, Prongs here has been fretting about the possibility of looking like an idiot tomorrow at the wedding so we decided– ahem, I decided," Sirius amended at Remus' raised eyebrow, "like the wonderful friend I am, to have a wedding rehearsal to ease the guy's nerves."
"I was busy finalizing things for tomorrow, Black. James is always an idiot. Besides, we can't have a rehearsal with just the four of us and it would be impractical to call everyone needed together right now."
James and Remus shot Sirius pointed looks.
"Of course we can!" Sirius insisted, not at all put off. "See, I'll be the minister, you two will be the happy, lovesick couple, and Moony can be everyone else... Now that I think about it, it would be easier if Wormy were here. He could help Moony be everyone else."
"I really need–"
"We'll be quick. Don't you want to ease your fiancé's nerves? Come on, Evans, if he gets too anxious about it he might even puke all over you tomorrow. You wouldn't want your special, wonderful, amazing, supposed to be the best day of your life to be ruined by deer barf, would you?"
"Let's just get it over with so Black here will shut up and I can go back to my last minute preparations" Lily said with a resigned sigh.
"Great! Okay, we can use the hallway as an aisle. Evans go outside. Moony will tell you when it's your turn to walk down the aisle. Wait no! Actually, don't go outside. You might leave. Let's just skip to the part where you walk down the aisle," Sirius commanded.
Lily moved to stand by the front door while Sirius dragged James to the other end of the hallway.
"Alright, so Evans walks down the aisle and everyone turns and stares at her because she's supposed to be gorgeous or something. I don't know how she's going to manage that. I mean, look at her right now, she looks like she's been dragged out of bed."
"Black!" Lily shouted.
"Padfoot," James warned.
"Well you did drag her over here," Remus pointed out.
"Moony, why aren't you doing your job? You're supposed to be walking Evans down the hall!" Sirius said, undeterred.
"I'm being the 'everyone else' that watches Lily walk down the aisle," Remus told him, not wanting to get up from where he was comfortably reclined on the couch.
"Well be the 'everyone else' that walks her down the aisle"
While they were arguing Lily had marched down the hall. She hit Sirius on the arm.
"Focus, Black, so I can go home," she said.
"Right. Ladies and gentlemen, dogs and wolves, deer and rats, and all the rest of you, we all know why we're here today. It's obviously because we had nothing to do and there was this wonderfully convenient way to entertain ourselves and pass time: the wedding of my best friend, the amazing Prongs here and Evans."
"This is the family you're marring into. Are you sure you want to go through with it?" Remus whispered to Lily. He had gotten up from his position on the couch and was now standing beside her.
"I'm not sure whether I'm amused or annoyed," Lily whispered back.
"Since the rest of this stuff is pretty useless and won't help Jamsie here anyway, I'm skipping to the part where you're supposed to say 'I do.' Do you, Prongs Potter, accept your sad fate and willingly walk to your doom by marrying Evans?"
"I don't think that's what the minister will say tomorrow," said James.
"Eeenk! Wrong answer! Would you like to steal?" Sirius said to Lily as if hosing a game show.
"He does," Remus cut in.
"Oh, Moony would like to steal! A point for you, Moony. Do you, Evans, the redheaded nag we all know and Prongs loves, take this guy and all the consequences that come with it?"
"The consequences being you, I suppose?" Lily asked with a raised eyebrow.
"Eeenk! Wrong answer! Moony, would you like to steal again?"
Remus rolled his eyes but answered anyway.
"She does"
"I now pronounce you deer and wife. You may now suck face."
James smirked and pulled Lily to him.
"Gotta do what the minister says," he reasoned before kissing her thoroughly. Sirius made gagging noises behind them.
"Oi! Break it up already. Save it for the honeymoon!" he yelled. The two broke apart with identical grins.
"That didn't exactly help me prepare for the wedding," James muttered to his fiancée
"Think of it this way, if the wedding tomorrow goes anything like this, you won't have to worry about looking like the idiot. The best man will outshine you."
You have now met my headcannon Sirius.
Thank you for reading. Please feel free to leave me your thoughts.
