The 'What If?' Affair

"Illya?"

"It must be 3 am."

"Uhm, yes it is."

sigh

"I thought so. So, what is on your mind tonight, Napoleon?"

"Ever wonder where you'd be if you weren't here?"

"Were I not in a drafty bell-tower hiding from the THRUSH agents trying to capture us or were I not in Austria?"

"Actually, I was thinking as in not in U.N.C.L.E. at all."

"Hm. As if I have left U.N.C.L.E. or if U.N.C.L.E. and I had never crossed paths?"

"Let's go with never crossing paths."

"There are a few possibilities. The most likely one being that I would be dead."

"Why would that be most likely?"

"Those who question too much are not overly welcomed by the government. At some point, I would have had to have made the choice to remain true to myself or do anything I must to survive."

"Not a very positive view."

"No. But realistic. I had expected to be dead regardless by this point, so I suppose the only difference would have been where or if my body would have been buried."

"Whoa, back up. You didn't expect to survive U.N.C.L.E. either?"

"No. I was actually quite shocked to survive the first month, let alone the first year."

"Well, obviously you survived. So, things weren't as bad as you'd expected?"

"No, they were as bad. However, my initial calculations did not take two things into account."

"What two things?"

"Yourself and Mister Waverly. I had not expected that anyone at U.N.C.L.E. would, how you say, have my back?"

"You were in service in Russia, right? No one had your back there?"

"Unless putting a knife in a back counts as having it, no."

"Illya? Mind a personal question?"

"If I mind, I will not answer. Go ahead."

"You're proud of where you came from. I guess I'm having problems seeing why."

"I love my country, Napoleon. The government is another matter altogether. I doubt you agree with all the politicians in this country, but that does not prevent you from loving the United States, does it?"

"Point taken."

"And you?

"And me what?"

"What would Napoleon Solo be doing had he and U.N.C.L.E. never crossed paths?"

"Hard to say. After the Korean War, I was restless. If I hadn't had places to put that energy? I might have ended up as one of those people that get their names in the paper for trying dangerous things and surviving them - or ended up dead myself."

"Probably just as well we were recruited then."

"Admittedly so, chum. Hey, we travel a lot. Meet lots of new people and some of them don't even want to shoot us. We have a nice variety of work to keep us busy. What more could we want?"

"Sleep."

"Oh. Right. Good night, Illya."

"More like Good Morning, but I will take what I can get at this point."