DIS: I'm trying to kill my writer's block.

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Title: First Time

Rating: T for mild content

Genre: Drama/Romance

Summary: Polarshipping. She felt that she was ruining him, destroying what was good inside of him...yet somehow he kept coming back to her. She wished she knew why. One shot.

Disclaimer: I do not own YuGiOh!

Notes/Warnings: Jounouchi/Mai; one shot

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First Time

Mai woke to the glare of sun in her eyes, spreading over her back, warming her shoulders. She clenched her eyes tight for a moment and then blinked them openly, slowly at first and then more rapidly to adjust to the brightness. Her eyes skimmed over the messy room that she recognized as her boyfriends. Directly across from her was the window, with the curtains parted slightly to allow some sunlight into the room. Her clothing was haphazardly tossed upon the ground and upon inspection she saw his boxers hanging from the end of the bed. The alarm clock on the bedside beside her red eight twenty-six, early enough to have the day before her, but also later to what she was accustomed.

She turned slightly to look at Jounouchi curled up behind her, one of his arms hanging over her slender waist, his hand cupping her stomach. His head was resting on his arm and he looked content, save for the dark circles underneath his eyes. She gently moved his arm from her waist and slid out of bed, tossing her mussed curls over her shoulder as she stood. She stretched her arms above her head and then moved to the bathroom, flipping the light on. The white light flickered before turning on, bathing her naked body in fluorescent light. She peered at her face in the mirror for a long moment, taking note of the smudges of eyeliner beneath her eyes and the lingering eye shadow that had gathered in tiny lines upon her eyelids. There was the slightest hint of her lipstick around her swollen mouth. She parted her lips and blew out a long breath before turning on the water and cleaning away what cosmetics she could.

Is this the type of life I wanted him to have? she wondered to herself, turning the water off and staring into the sink. Did I want this continuous fight/making up scenario that we have? She knew the answer to that too well. She had fought against him for some time, suspecting that she might make him unhappy. She felt nothing but dislike for herself, regardless of how she might have seemed to others. She tried to be strong for Jounouchi – she wanted to be strong for him – but those times when she broke down, she had no control over herself. She raged, she cried, and she threatened to leave him, which was always his biggest fear. He would rage back, he would cry, and he would beg her not to leave him, always telling her how amazing he thought she was, taking all the blame, and reminding her of them and how he loved her. If he did not fight for her, she knew that she would leave him and days later, she would regret it, but would be too prideful to ask for him to take her back.

She raised her head to look at herself again. She felt the press of tears behind her eyes and closed them tight to avoid anymore tears. There had been enough of those last night.

"Mai?" Jounouchi's groggy voice called from the bedroom. She drew in a deep breath and steadied herself. "Mai!" She heard him scrambling out of bed, likely fearing that she had left him. His footsteps seemed to pause, no doubt because he had seen her things still lying there, and a moment later he appeared in the mirror behind her. A relieved expression crossed his face. He moved forward and circled his arms around her, releasing a sigh upon her chilled skin as he pushed his face against her neck. "I was afraid you had left."

It would be better if I would, she thought to herself, but instead kissed his a moment, she added, "Why would I? I'm naked."

"Like that would stop you?" he teased.

She smiled in spite of her mood and turned and hugged him, ignoring the hard piece of flesh pressing against her stomach. That, she learned, was a natural part of Jounouchi when it came to them being naked together. "I love you, Jounouchi."

"Nah, you love my body."

"I think it's more that you love my body," she returned, drawing away and striking a sexy pose. He laughed and pulled her back, nuzzling his nose against hers.

"Well...yeah, but that's just a special addition to everything else." He grinned at her. "I love you even without the amazing body."

"So, I can eat cake?"

"All of the cake you want. You'll still look beautiful and still be mine." He pressed his lips to hers briefly. "Won't you?"

"Of course, hun

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A few nights later, Mai ventured out into the bitter cold of autumn. Halloween had passed and despite her usual plans of partying and drinking, she had remained inside with Jounouchi, watching scary movies. And, despite his usual plans of video games and movies with his friends, he had chosen to spend the holiday with her instead. She felt guilty, as if she had taken him from what he really wanted to do. He assured her, however, that he would rather be spending time with her rather than doing things with them. It did not make her feel any better about the situation, though, and had bothered her ever since.

Have I ruined him? she thought, pulling her scarf tighter around her neck. It seems unfair...to take away a part of his life that he enjoyed because he knew that I would rather he spend it with me. The guilt settled in the pit of her stomach once again. She was new to honest relationships, ones where there was actual emotion involved. She was unsure of how to feel, how she was supposed to feel, and whenever she felt a bad emotion, it didn't seem right to her. I know each person is supposed to make sacrifices in a relationship, but this seems like so much more...I feel as if I have physically and mentally altered him.

She paused in front of a tea shop, noticing some gift-wrapped chocolate inside. She stepped inside and surveyed the delicately wrapped caramel apples, chocolate-covered pretzels, fudge pieces, and other delectable sweets and considered which one Jounouchi would like best. She glanced to the side to look at the sparse amount of people who inhabited the tea shop. She was surprised to see Seto Kaiba settled at one of the tables, reading a book and drinking from a dainty, steaming cup. She turned away just as he raised his eyes to hers and finally chose the fudge pieces. The last thing she needed were rude comments from Kaiba of all people.

"Would you like some specialty tea with this?" the woman behind the counter asked, indicating a selection of boxes of tea. "It's half off with your purchase," she added, smiling. Mai surveyed the tea and then chose a nutmeg tea with peppermint and cinnamon added to it. She waited as the cashier rang it up and after paying, left the shop with the bag in hand.

She walked from the way she had come from to return to her apartment and as she was getting nearer to the complex, her phone rang. She fumbled in her pocket to retrieve it with her cold fingers and after touching the screen to answer, she put the phone to ear and cleared her throat, saying, "Hello?"

"Hey, there," Jounouchi's cheerful, boyish voice sounded on the other line. "You're lookin' beautiful tonight."

Despite knowing she was alone, she glanced around before asking, "And how do you know that?"

"You always look beautiful," he replied simply.

She smiled. "Well, how about you come on over to see just how beautiful I look?"

"I'm already on my way."

Her heart raised at hearing this and she quickened her pace a bit so that she could get home sooner. "Really? How close are you?"

"Pretty close," he said vaguely. "In fact, I'd say..."

She jumped away as a figure sprung out from behind an alley and stumbled, having lost their balance upon realizing she was not there. Upon recognizing Jounouchi, Mai scowled and pulled him upright so he did not fall to the ground. "Asshole!" she snapped.

He laughed. "Aww, c'mon, you had to admit it was kinda funny." He grinned impishly up at her and it was hard to stay angry at him for long. Had she not been in front of him, had she not had to stare at his warm, adoring eyes, perhaps it would have been easier to yell at him over the phone or sneer at him through text, but instead she was standing in front of him, with her hand on his shoulder still.

So, rather than doing what her instinct would have been, she rolled her eyes and released a disgusted sound. "Men!" was all she said before dropping her hand and stalking in front of him. He hastened to take her bag from her and then offered his arm to her. She glanced haughtily at it and then with an arrogant toss of her head looped her arm in his. She peered up at him, her lips curling in a smirk to show that she was merely joking. If possible, his goofy grin had become larger.

"You know," he said, "you really do look beautiful like I said."

"I thought I always did," she asked, raising her eyebrows.

"You do." He paused, causing her to stop. "Just like I said." He released her arm and curled it around her dainty shoulders, pulling her against him. She tipped her head back and he bent his head to draw her into a deep, yet soft kiss. His mouth molded to hers perfectly, his tongue tasting of some type of fruity candy he had no doubt eaten at Yuugi's, and she could smell the scent of the game shop on his clothes. "You're the perfect gal, Mai."

"I try to be," she said rather sincerely, not immediately pulling away. His smile turned a bit puzzled. "Are you happy with me, Jounouchi?"

If anything, he looked even more baffled. "Do I seem unhappy?" he asked, confused.

"No," she said in a far more aggressive, defensive tone than she meant to take. Irritated with herself, she pushed away from him and sighed impatiently. She saw a wary look on his face, one that she knew as him expecting a fight. "It's just...I feel like I'm taking away the life that you like...taking away things that make you happy."

"Haven't I done the same thing?" he asked cautiously. "You used to go out all the time before me."

She was quiet a moment and then said, "But you make me happier. That would just bore me now."

"Well, that's how it is for me, too."

"Hun, I don't think – "

"Listen, Mai," Jounouchi interrupted, spreading his arms out, "this is all that I am! I have my time with my friends, but it's not the same as time with you. I mean...you're my girlfriend. I love you. I want to spend forever with you. That's kind of a different bond than just friendship. And, it's like..." He rubbed his head, temporarily speechless as he searched for the right words before continuing, "It's like it's not just that bond, either. You're also my best friend. Aren't I...aren't I yours?" He looked at her, uncertain yet somehow hopeful.

Mai didn't say anything for a few moments, considering all he had told her and then slowly nodded her head. "Yes, you are. You're the only person I'd ever trust, Jounouchi."

He smiled tentatively. "Then why worry, Mai? I'm not losing friends from it – they understand – and I don't think you're losing friends from it."

"I guess...I just don't understand things."

"You try to be such a strong girl, Mai," he said quietly, approaching her and taking her hand, "but I don't want you to try and deal with things by yourself. Part of being with me is having someone to talk to. You know I'll try to help anyway I can."

"I know," she said after a pause, squeezing his hand. "I'm still trying to get used to things."

"So am I." He laughed. "I'm not just killin' time here. I'm trying to make this last, believe it or not."

Mai tilted her head back a bit so that she could look into Jounouchi's face. She had always known him to be a loyal, earnest individual, if somewhat dense at times; although she expected that from men. Her lips curled up and she rested her head against his arm for a moment.

"Hun, you're the only one that I do believe."

Somehow, that only made Jounouchi smile wider.

Finis

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DIS: Huh...well, this was my first time writing this couple. Well, my first time focusing primarily on this couple, that is. Let me know how you think I did. Ciao!