It's times like this when it all seems like a dream…when all those memories are like stars fading in the morning light.
I remember little of my early childhood, only that I worked from a young age…I worked faithfully with my family, doing what our master told us.
During my fifth year of life, my family and I left with the exodus. It was a horrible thing, the exodus, we walked for days and had to witness others view their mirages; that was a small torture all its own…after weeks of walking aimlessly, I felt a tug in the deepest part of my soul.
I had followed the tug mindlessly, I could faintly hear the others trailing behind me in concern. I had paid them no heed; I was determined to follow the tug that was continually growing stronger the more I pursued.
Soon enough, I had unintentionally lead all of us to a river. I walked into the river smiling, the tug had stopped. Everyone else had run into the river laughing, crying, and thanking God for having lead to the river. It was when I looked at my reflection and saw a completely different person.
"Catarate Re…from Egypt." I had murmured as I stared down at the new me. I looked up at the others, "Everyone! We have been given this land to make new, to make ours! And this land is Egypt!"
After that, the first settlement was founded. The majority of those who lived there held onto the old ways, while others wanted to leave the old ways and begin something new.
I had become distant with my family after having become a new person; they looked at me like I was a demon of the night waiting for them to step into my domain, only to devour them in the end.
That stiff relationship was terminated when I left with others to journey further down the river to form a second settlement, hopefully a more changed society. I had just entered my tenth year of life.
When the second settlement was finally founded, it was a different society, but there were those that still brought things of old; most everyone else was finally beginning new.
Having gone to the second settlement, I knew I would never see my family again, and to this day, I am able to see their faces but no longer recall their names…
Soon enough those that wished to completely smother out the old ways decided to trek further down the river. Even though I was only considered a child at my fourteenth year, I still readily journeyed with the others. I was ready to leave all things that reminded me of my old life.
I was usually ahead of the others, weaving through the water reeds like a snake through the dunes. Finally, when the eldest of the group could take no more, we stopped and began our new society.
Our new society only welcomed those who wished for a new way of life, those who did not, were sent back.
It was only three years later when I was approached and told that I would be crowned the leader of all three settlements. I was astonished at first, but accepted none the less. I was taken to a palace that I alone, with my servants, would inhabit.
Two weeks after my coronation, I was in my room when one of my servants came up to me. I had questioned them about why they had intruded upon me in my bed chambers; they had not answered. Beginning to become fearful, I ordered the servant to leave, they did not. Only when I had opened my mouth to scream, did the servant move…all I am able to remember is a weight on my chest, the feeling of becoming weaker and weaker, then darkness.
When I gained consciousness, I was floating along the river, gasping I sat up only to sink. At last, I was able to pull myself to the shore. Once was able to stand, I looked at my reflection, I still looked the same; my hair like a black waterfall cascaded down my back, my green eyes with contrasting brown accents shined through my bangs.
While looking at my reflection, I saw blood coating my throat. I panicked and began to wash it hurriedly. I stopped only when I saw the blood was gone, I felt around my neck. There had to be some form of injury on my neck, where was it!
Being in the panic caused tears of fear to run down my face, there was no cut or puncture wound…but how could there be blood?
After the panic of finding myself alive when I thought I was dead, I traveled. Through those travels I realized even if I still looked the same, I was no longer normal…I went months without food or drink, I was able to stay up for days; never losing energy! It was terrifying, yet amazing at the same time.
It was only when I had met other people again did I realize what sort of monster I had become…I heard and saw them long before they caught site of me. I was happy to have seen them, but that excitement disappeared completely when I caught whiff of them. I was unable to control myself; it was as if I was watching a play.
My body threw itself forward into a run, I was sure that I resembled a dog on the hunt. When I was close to them, my body slowed enough to seem normal; I was close enough for the people to notice me, I tried to make my mouth open to warn them. All it did was smile in a deceptively sweet way; I wanted to scream.
It was only after I had drank my fill, killing five of seven, that I was able to regain control of my body…the two that were still living were unconscious, most likely due to shock and fear.
Not wanting to leave them, I grabbed them both, and ran to a spot that smelled of living blood. I took them to the settlement that I had once lived in. I left the two on the outskirts of the first settlement, and ran away to find a new place for myself.
Now, thousands of years later, I still walk the earth. Though I have more self-control, I am able to feed without killing. One would think that I would be able to overcome the feeling of being a monster after living for so long, but I have yet to do so.
Then again…maybe those visions of never having been a monster are just that…visions, dreams, delusions.
I'm never sure anymore; it seems like I've always have been, and always will be a wolf in sheep's clothing.
