Disclaimer: We do not own Avatar: The Last Airbender, any of the characters, places, nor plots that come along with it. We also do not own Indiana Jones, or other such things that are blatantly not ours, as we would have enough spare time to write something like this versus creating moneymaking things that benefit society.

The writers would like to make it clear that while this is a Mary Sue parody, it is not a direct parody of any story or group of specific stories. In fact, it was all conspired in a conversation between the two authors; all Sue-reading had been done long before the fact. If anyone finds this piece offensive, please note that nobody in particular was in mind while writing this with the exception of stereotypical Mary Sue authors and stereotypical Mary Sues.

WARNING! This story contains the mangling and, in some cases, outright destroying of character personalities, plot holes, dues ex machina, interruptions from beyond the fourth wall, and situations that are altogether very ridiculous. The authors are not responsible for any brain cells that may be lost or damaged during the reading of this tale.

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Something Cliché

- By Vi and Eve

Chapter One

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It was a bleak day when xXxZukoHartzMe4evaXxX discovered the wonders of the Internet. The second season of Avatar had just ended, there was no word on when the third season would come out, and in her desperation to find out what happened to her favorite show, and particularly her favorite character, she turned to Avatar 'fanfiction'. She had been skimming through link upon links, chapter upon chapters of these stories for about two hours when something horrible was spawned in her mind.

She was going to write a love story. Not just any love story, but the story of two 'sole-mates(sic)' who she knew had to be together whether the writers of Avatar thought of it or not. With any luck, thought xXxZukoHartzMe4evaXxX, the writers of Avatar would hear of her awe-inspiring tale and someday include it into cannon. She created an account on this very website, and thus, our story begins…

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It had only been a week since Zuko rejoined his sister and the Fire Nation, and already he was feeling at home. Zuko looked down at a cup of water that Azula had given him. That is, she gave it to him because it was intended to be his drinking water and bathing water. Of course, having known his sister since birth, he had become quite accustomed to this kind of treatment and took it in stride.

"Good morning, Zuzu," Azula greeted her brother with an all-but-friendly slap on the back of the head. "Getting along well, I hope?"

"Actually-"

Since she was not particularly interested in his answer, Azula lifted her leg and stomped on his foot, which she did simply because she was sadistic and evil, and the authoress had decided that it was very in character of her. Zuko once again took this in stride. Azula was quite put off when Zuko did not scream or flail about as most of her elite guards did when she stomped on their feet, and started to walk out of the room.

"Oh, and by the way," she started, turning around, "I took the liberty of finding a suitable chambermaid for you. She used to be our best gardener."

"So, then…" Zuko looked confusedly at Azula. "…why would you make her a chambermaid?"

"She enjoyed gardening too much," Azula said… evilly. "You can thank me later by turning all of your valuables over to me." She smiled mischievously and left the room. Zuko glared, but felt quite smug on the inside, knowing that he had no valuables to turn over, mainly because Azula and Ozai had burned them after he was banished.

He did not have to wait long for the chambermaid to show up. She was a sixteen year-old girl, about five-foot-two, with sparkling green eyes that shone with such brilliance that it was impossible to focus on anything else. Well, it would have been impossible to focus on anything else, if she did not have an unnaturally perfect body, with curves that made the standard, unattractive chambermaid uniform look like it could be worn by the wealthiest of the Fire Nation. Her raven hair danced past her shoulder blades in silky onyx waves upon her back. She continued to be described until this became one of the largest paragraphs in the entire story, which consisted mostly of pointless adjectives.

Zuko was attracted to her immediately for some odd reason, but of course, being as stubborn as he was, would probably not reveal this until at least chapter two. Zuko searched his mind for a greeting decent enough to use in the presence of such an impossibly gorgeous creature.

"Hi," he said.

The chambermaid, who did not seem to react strangely to Zuko's unique features at all, smiled and returned the greeting prettily. "My name is Marisu."

Marisu. Why is that name so familiar? Zuko shook it off and proceeded to gawk at her. Marisu searched the room for something to do, but only found a cup of water and a poorly made cot.

"Nice room you have here," she commented.

Zuko looked around and suddenly felt embarrassed. After all, he had carelessly left his water in the middle of the room.

"Here, let me refill your cup for you." Marisu intended to do exactly that, and perhaps she would have succeeded, had she not prettily tripped over her other foot and spilt the water all over her uniform. Zuko flinched at this, knowing that because the water was from none other than Azula, the origins of it were questionable. Marisu apologized a number of times because she was humble like that.

"Oh, sorry, sorry!"

"Um, don't worry about it," he answered uneasily. "I wasn't planning on using any of that water anyway."

Marisu gasped. She was so overjoyed by his forgiveness that she grasped onto him. Zuko was rather shocked. He was caught between feeling rather happy that a pretty girl was hugging him, not reacting at all because he was stubborn and did not wish to reveal his feelings for her as previously stated, and pushing her away because she was all wet. He decided that being somewhat in character was a good middle ground, and so he did nothing but look embarrassed. He probably would have been annoyed too, had this not been Marisu he was dealing with.

She saw the look on his face and instantly let go, blushing. "My apologies, sir."

Zuko shrugged it off. "Don't worry abou-"

"It's just that no one has ever been so terribly nice to me," Marisu continued, ever-so-eager to tell him her life story, "You see, when I was just seven years old, I fell through a plot hole and landed just outside this palace. Even though I was not a citizen of the Fire Nation, I was told that I could live here, but it was nothing like I had imagined! They made me live in a broken oven and fed me only a slice of bread everyday. Upon my tenth birthday I had become old enough to work in the palace, but even then I continued to be physically and emotionally abused by the firebenders I served. It's wonderful to feel like I am finally appreciated," Marisu finished, looking truly grateful.

Zuko was surprised by how open she was about all this considering he was as much a firebender as anyone else in the palace, but in the meantime he tried to interpret what she had been explaining. "Plot hole?"

"Yes," Marisu frowned, "I don't remember what happened before that. I have amnesia." She then brushed the sad expression off and smiled at Zuko. "But how did we even get on to such a morbid subject? I'm sure your life here is wonderful."

He returned a spiteful glower to her. "Not exactly."

After that, words just seemed roll off of Zuko's tongue as if they had a mind of their own, and soon enough, he found himself telling his own life story to Marisu, despite the fact that he had only known her for an entire ten minutes. He told her everything from the story of his mother's disappearance, to the Angi Kai battle with his father (she asked him if his face 'hurt terribly' when he received the scar), his run-ins with the Avatar, to getting banished, right down to betraying his uncle to rejoin the Fire Nation. The whole story took several hours and a page or two to tell, or at least it would have if the authoress had not written it as only one paragraph. Marisu listened intently through almost all of it; the exceptions were, of course, when she would interrupt to give Zuko her sympathies or agree with him. However, the whole 'uncle betraying' part did not seem to sit right with her.

"But Zuko…" she said, even though he never said his name to her, "After all you went through with your uncle, you would just betray him like that?"

"Well…" Zuko had a sudden lapse of conscience, even more so than he normally would, because Marisu insinuated that he had done wrong.

"Don't worry!" said Marisu, suddenly concocting a plan, "I think I know how to set things right!"

Zuko raised his remaining eyebrow, "How?"

"Since we're in the Fire Nation palace, we can strike at them from the inside!"

Zuko was very taken aback. Not only was that suicide, but it was the best plan he had ever heard!