One Night Only
"LADIES AND GENTLEMENS, BOYS AND GIRLS. HERE THEY COME THE ONE AND ONLY... R5!" yelled an announcer as a stadium full of dumbass tweenage girls cheered on five disgusting, stupid looking, blonde-ass muppet things appeared on stage picking up their instruments (whom in this writer's opinion, deserve much...much...better) and began playing their shitty songs.
"Oooh baby grab on my vagina" sang Ross Lynch as he farted into the microphone. The other muppets began to chew on their instruments after shoving them up their pasty asses. "Yeah I'm a dirty hippy" continued their faggot dumbass spokesman as the idiotic fans continued to cheer the awful music playing until a blackout occured.
"Oh Cecilia! You're breaking my heart!" sang voices who appeared on stage as a spot light shined on like 5 people (I think) as fangirls cheered "mergawd itz The Vamps!" as they also began to play their awful music. (Seriously how many times can you cover a song before it sucks?) After minutes of stupid songs the lights went out again.
IT WAS FIVE SECONDS OF SUMMER... I DON'T KNOW ANY OF THEM. I JUST KNOW THAT THEY'RE A FUCKIN' AUSSIE BOY BAND AND ARE FUCKIN AWFUL. SHIT THAT!
Let's get real here...I'm a fuckin' genius don't get jelly reading this, one day you can be on fleek like this real motherfucker right here. LET US GET BACK TO THE STORY!
So R5, The Vamps, 5sos, and 1D(who magically appeared) all got together on stage and began to circle jerk each other with Rydell having the largest cock in the circle SUDDENLY an orange light appeared as a shadowy figure stood before the crappy teen groups. IT WAS THE ALMIGHTY, ALL POWERFUL ED SHEERAN whom's hair glowed like a raging fire as he pointed towards the dickheads.
"BABY NOW! YOU ALL HAVE TO FIGHT TO THE DEATH!" sang the ginger god "SO YOU WED THE GREATEST PERSON IN THE WORLD! TAYLOR SWIFT!" continued Sheeran as Taylor Swift licked her armpit and rubbed her nutsack.
"No thank you" the groups said much to the surprise of Ed Sheeran.
"Really but she's beautiful...OH GAWD! WOMAN WHAT ARE YOU FUCKIN' DOIN? DIE HEATHEN DIE!" ED SHEERAN said as he used his lightning magic to fire Taylor Swift into oblivion. "NOW FIGHT!" commanded Elder God Ed Sheeran as the groups began to circle jerk each other even harder until the lights went out again as the smell of onions arose from the crowd.
"ONION CLUB 4LYFE" as Shrek and crew began to destroy the stadium throwing the fans and chairs around as the Onion Club rushed the stage and began tearing apart the member of 5sos, 1D, Zane, The Jonas Brothers, Fine Bros., The Vamps, and most of R5 only leaving Ross Austin Numbnuts Lynch Moon for Shrek as the orge who grabbed the muppet by the throat and stuff his dick into Ross's mouth and skull-fucked his head open.
"ONION CLUB...JUST SO SWWEEEEEEEEETTT!" Shrek said as he and his crew put on their badass sunglasses as they smoked a fatty. "Bertrum...we comin' for you nigga!"
