The Light That Blinds

Deus Ex Procella

"Momoko, sweetie! You're going to be late for school!" Kakiko stared at the stairs, worried as always about her eldest daughter. Same as every other morning, Momoko walked in with her feet dragging and her eyes following them diligently. "Are you going to be okay Honey?" A diffident nod and an indifferent hug came right on schedule and before Kakiko could question her further, Momoko was shuffling out the door.

"She misses it…" Kakiko mused to herself, her own feet dragging and her heart heavy for both her girls. Kuriko had been run ragged by the heroism and her sister's depression was only keeping her spirits low. Hachizou wasn't ignorant to the unspoken understanding between the three girls, and though he didn't show it, Kakiko knew it was tearing him up to be left out of the loop; it hurt especially knowing that their secret had to do with Momoko's perpetual unhappiness. Kakiko herself was dying to tell her husband; perhaps to bring the whole family together again now that it felt they had drifted so far apart. She'd taken so many days off from work since the Blight incident, and today happened to be one of those days.

"At least she'll talk to someone," Kakiko watched Momoko meet up with Butch at the corner. Kakiko had only been told very little about Butch's involvement in all of this, but she knew enough to trust that the monster really was Momoko's friend. He seemed to be the only person she would turn to now. Kakiko smiled heavily and watched them until they'd long since disappeared from view.

XXXXXXXXXX

"So…how ya doin' this morning, Ms. Momoko?" Momoko smiled brightly, at least as brightly as she had since losing her powers.

"I'm okay I guess…today's not that bad so far," Butch smiled and nodded, Momoko's smile softened at the sight of his ever heated cheeks when they were together. "How are your brothers?"

"Same as always, I think they're starting to catch on to where I'm disappearing to,"

"That's…bad right?" Butch shrugged, not entirely sure himself anymore. Momoko nodded and sighed, trying to get her head together. After that, the walk was largely quiet and serene. A few times Momoko closed her eyes and tried to just take in everything around her. The wind was gentle, if a tad cold, but it didn't stop the birds from chirping and the leaves from rustling. The sun above was warm and inviting, though occasionally hidden behind the clouds rolling overhead. Momoko opened her eyes and sighed, slowing down a bit and hanging her head.

"Are people still treating you bad, Ms. Momoko? I'll make them stop," Momoko looked up suddenly at Butch who had stopped and was staring at her very seriously. "Really…if they keep treating you bad I'll make them stop," Momoko smiled and looked down, her face heating up. She turned away from Butch, who was watching her with too much intensity for a boy his age.

"That's okay…things aren't so bad now,"

XXXXXXXXXX

"Hey Bad Girl, can I get through or will you hit me for asking?" Things weren't as bad as they had been in the beginning. But they were anything but fine. Momoko moved out of the way to allow the girl to pass. Momoko winced at the glare she received when the two accidentally bumped, but quickly went on her way to her lunch table. In all honesty, she was very tempted to take Butch up on his offer. But having her younger friend beat up her classmates wouldn't do anything to help her abysmal reputation.

"Hey Momoko, are you feeling alright?" Momoko looked over at Miyako and nodded, smiling as broadly as she could force herself to.

"Of course, I'm doing fine Miyako,"

"You sure? Because I'll go have a um…talk with Tomari if you want?" Kaoru offered, looking over her shoulder at the girl who had been rude to Momoko before. Momoko shook her head and played with her food. Surprisingly she was eating more than messing around, today was at least better than usual.

"Today's really not been that bad you guys…I think things are finally getting better,"

"I just wish we could tell everyone Momoko…it's not fair that they treat you like this," Momoko half met Miyako's comforting glance between bites and finally managed to give her friends the first genuine smile she'd managed in ages.

"Really guys, it's alright. I kind of deserve it for how I acted…"

"Momoko stop it!"

"Things are getting better…really please don't worry so much," Kaoru backed off and sighed. With a nod she went back to her lunch, satisfied that Momoko was really getting better. Miyako gave Momoko one last questioning look, and receiving a positive response she smiled and also picked up eating her lunch.

XXXXXXXXXX

Momoko and Kuriko were walking home in relative peace. Kuriko was excitedly telling Momoko about her day while Momoko only smiled and offered the proper responses.

"How is the super heroine business going, Kuriko?" Momoko asked out of the blue. Kuriko stopped in mid-sentence and thought about Momoko's question.

"It's been really cool! But I had no idea how tiring it was, it's almost like we're getting monsters popping up every day now," Momoko whistled softly and remember how she used to hope for monster attacks. Anything to stop being Momoko and get to be Blossom. Momoko shook her head.

'No! Don't go there, you'll only start feeling bad again, and today was pretty good too!' Smiling she gave Kuriko a small hug, with more enthusiasm then she'd displayed recently.

"Yeah you get used to it though. Kaoru and Miyako told me you've been doing a really good job. I'm proud of you!" Kuriko beamed and caught her sister's hand while they continued walking home. Momoko at first didn't squeeze Kuriko's hand back, but after slight hesitation smiled and gave it a tight squeeze. Right at that moment Kuriko's belt began to flash.

"Uh oh! I better go transform! Tell Mommy I'll be home as soon as I can!" Momoko nodded, but didn't let go of Kuriko's hand immediately. Kuriko stopped, standing at arm's length from her sister and staring at her.

"Momoko I have to," Momoko shook her head and dropped Kuriko's hand abruptly.

"Yeah I know, go save the day Blossom," Kuriko was hurt by the tone in Momoko's voice, but smiled and nodded. Momoko caught her hand while she was turning. "Kuriko…good luck," Momoko flashed a thumbs up at her sister, who grinned and returned it as she took off to transform. Momoko watched her disappear and swallowed the lump in her throat.

"I am proud…" But she was just as jealous as she was proud. Quitting Powerpuff Girls Z had been the smartest thing Momoko had ever done in her life, but she wanted back in so badly. Rubbing numbly at her eyes, Momoko took off running for home. She only stopped once to look up at Hyper Blossom's pink trail, feeling an emptiness in her heart that made it hard to breath.

XXXXXXXXXX

"Momoko? How was school Honey?"

"Was okay…" Momoko didn't glance at her mom before rushing up the stairs to her room. Kakiko hurried out of the kitchen to watch her daughter retreat, knowing that something had happened again. She frowned and winced slightly when the door slammed shut. Kuriko wasn't with her, she'd probably been called away to save the city. Every now and then Momoko would let her know if this was the case, but it was rare.

"Kiko, I'm home!" Kakiko brightened up immensely and turned to greet her husband with a hug and kiss.

"Chizou! I didn't think you'd be in until late tonight?" Hachizou gave her another quick kiss as they went to the kitchen, where Kakiko had already begun fixing dinner.

"I decided to leave early today," Kakiko grinned and glanced back at him with a mischievous look in her eyes.

"Ooh, being a rebel today are you?" Hachizou laughed and scratched his head, blushing lightly.

"Of course not, I finished early just so we could all be together for supper tonight," Kakiko continued to beam as she shuffled about the kitchen.

"We'll be having supper a little later, Kuriko is going to be out for a while with some of her friends," This was always the part Kakiko hated most, lying to her husband. Hachizou opened the newspaper, turning directly to the comics. He nodded to his wife, accepting the lie without a bit of suspicion. Kakiko breathed a small sigh of relief.

XXXXXXXXXX

Momoko laid across her bed, swaying her legs back and forth off the end. She was tired of crying, tired of feeling so sorry for herself. But she told herself so many times this time would be the last time…and it never was. Whenever she saw Kuriko leave to save the day, when her friends left her to become super heroines, and when she saw how the world loved them so much for all they've done all she could do was start crying again. That horrible terrible emptiness that was eating at her heart wouldn't let her be, no matter how she tried.

"I'm such a horrible person…all I want is…" All she wanted was to be a hero again. She allowed herself to become Blight so that everyone could see her. With Blight ripped out of her, she thought she would have learned to not be so selfish anymore. She hadn't learned anything but how terrible a person she really was. Every night, all she dreamed of was being a heroine again. She wanted to be the one who showed up at the last minute to save the day. The one people would remember for her bravery. And for all of that wanting, she was a powerless, irresponsible coward who couldn't save herself, let alone the world.

Momoko heard something tapping on her window and called out without looking up, "It's unlocked Butch." The window opened and her little admirer slipped in, shutting the window behind him. He stood by the window, blushing and unsure how he could help. Momoko cried silently a little longer, then sat up and began rubbing her eyes.

"Is this really how you wanna waste your evening? With a stupid crybaby?" She asked Butch, half-serious and half-jokingly. Butch blushed a bit darker and shrugged his shoulders.

"I guess…I just thought you needed company, Ms. Momoko," Momoko giggled and looked back at Butch, who refused to meet her gaze.

"I needed a friend…and I'm glad it's you Butch," She winked listlessly and tried to offer him a smile, "I mean, for an annoying little stalker you can be pretty cool," Butch grinned and finally met her gaze.

"Anytime for you Ms. Momoko," He finally sat down on the edge of the bed and stuck his tongue out at her, "A ditz like you needs someone to look out for her," Momoko glared at him which caused Butch to start laughing. His laughing became frantic when Momoko pounced on him and began to tickle him.

"I'll give you something to laugh about!"

"Wait! No stop! Ms. Momoko stop!"

XXXXXXXXXX

It was late and the girls had long since gone to bed. Hachizou now sat on the couch watching the late night news. Kakiko was finishing up the laundry—she'd insisted he relax, knowing that he had been working harder since she started taking days off. Supper had been warm and good, if a little uneasy. He frowned and released a heavy sigh. Something was tearing at Momoko something awful.

'She hasn't been herself in so long, and she hasn't been going to play with her friends much anymore either,' It was true that Momoko had been hanging out with Kaoru and Miyako less and less. Alternatively, Kuriko had been hanging out with her own friends far more often. His youngest daughter had been harried and tired lately. But to his knowledge she wasn't involved in any after school sports, and her anime club only met twice a week so that couldn't be the cause.

'Kiko,' His wife seemed almost as troubled as his daughters. Kakiko had always been bound and determined to get her family anything they wanted, trying to balance the steady beam between work and home. Now she was staying home more often than she had in all the years they'd been married since Kuriko was born. Worried though he was, he couldn't bring himself to interrogate her about it, he didn't want to add to her stress. Hachizou yawned and turned back to the news.

"Chizou, you're still awake?" Hachizou looked up at his wife with a smile, wrapping his arm around her when she snuggled up next to him, resting her head on his shoulder.

"Yeah, I was just catching the news before bed," Kakiko smiled and the two watched the rest of the news before they too went off to bed.