Author's Note: I know from my stories that it really doesn't seem like it, but I'm actually a huge Bade lover. I just prefer to write angst, and I can write Beck and Jade a lot better than most characters; so angsty Bade stories it is.
Disclaimer: I do not own Victorious or any of the characters mentioned in this story.
WARNING: STORY CONTAINS SOME MENTIONS OF PHYSICAL AND EMOTIONAL ABUSE SORRY
Dear Beck:
First, thank you for all the times we have had. They have been fun. But, if I am going to do this, you need to know my side of these stories. You deserve an explanation. Even though we're breaking up, you do deserve an explanation.
And an apology.
Let's get that one out of the way first.
I'm sorry that I'm not the right person for you.
If this is breaking your heart, then I'm sorry, but I hope you at least begin to expect that I was going to leave. I've been leaving clues for you for a long time now.
But you never were the brightest, right?
I mean, you deserve honesty, so you'll get honesty, even if it might be brutal sometimes.
Also, by the time you receive this letter, I'll already be long gone in New York City.
Don't come looking for me.
I don't want to talk to you.
Part of the reason I left was because of you, so I really don't want to see you ever again.
Now, on to the reasons I left:
One, I never liked California much, too hot and dry of a climate. Not very good for my introverted personality. Whatever. This one isn't much of a reason.
Two, I felt stuck in our relationship.
I hated it. You would control me and then we would yell. Not a very positive environment.
Putting your girlfriend in a time out is never a suitable answer, you know. Wanting to know where your girlfriend is every second of every day isn't acceptable either. We are not attached at the hip, you do not need to know everywhere I am going.
People call me the possessive one in our relationship.
If only they knew.
If only they knew how everything you do plays me off as the possessive, angry one, but they've been wrong the entire time. You're the possessive one, and you always have been.
I used to find it cute, taking it as a sign that you really, really liked me. But over time, it became clear that you thought of me as something like a pet. You expected me to obey you. I don't obey anyone but myself. That's one of the reasons we could never last.
And I know, once I leave, that you'll find another toy to keep from the others and maybe she'll fight back but she probably won't.
She'll listen to you like the puppy dog she is and obey your every command. At first she'll love it because she'll be instantaneously popular, but then you'll begin playing her off as the jealous and possessive one in public, just like you did to me.
She'll stay with you, unhappy, for a very long time, trying to make an agreement with you, but she'll never win. Then, she'll either suck it up and stay with you and hate it or she'll leave.
You don't want a partner, Beck, you want a toy.
Three, Tori Vega.
She's barely been at our school for two years, but she acts like she's been here longer than any of us. Everything we worked so hard for, gone as soon as she showed up.
Every play she auditioned for, she got the lead role. If she had earned these fairly, I would have no problem with any of this. She's a great actor, and I would not mind losing a role to her if she earned it. But no, the second she opens her mouth, anything she wants is hers.
So, acting-wise, I won't do very well with her anywhere around me. Hopefully she stays away from New York.
Of course, you loved her because she was instantly a dog for you, doing everything you asked on a moment's notice.
Fourth, back to you Beck.
I feel bad for any girls that will eventually date you.
Perfect, emotionless Beck in public.
Terrifying, controlling, violent Beck in private.
Didn't anyone ever teach you that hitting people isn't nice?
That hitting people who are weaker than you to feel strong only makes you a coward?
Beck Oliver, you are nothing but a coward.
A filthy, horrible coward.
And I know that right now, as you're reading this, you're beginning to shake with rage, angry about how I'm able to talk to you like this, but don't you understand how this is how you talked to me?
You treat everyone as if they're below you.
You act like you stand up for the ones weaker than you, but you think of them as nothing but dirt.
People act like you're perfect. After all, you're dating me. The possessive, angry Jade West. Oh wait, the possessive one is you, sorry, I keep forgetting.
I'm very glad to rid my hands of you Beckett.
You're not just a coward, Beck.
You're an arrogant coward.
.
I've been planning this for months, you know.
This isn't a spur of the moment decision because I'm mad about whatever stupid fight we last had, this is a carefully calculated decision. I have an apartment rented already, with the first 10 months of rent pre-paid. I have jobs set up, scripts already memorized. I also have friends in the business up there that are willing to help me with publishing books. I have plenty of money to spend on food and more than enough for the next few years' worth of food and rent and anything else I might need. I have my insurance all set up for everything and an already furnished apartment. After writing this I will confirm my plane ticket then drop this letter and the one's written to some other friends and enemies at the post office. Then, I will double check my luggage for tomorrow, get ready for bed, and go to sleep for my final night in LA.
I will not call you before bed because I will finally be free of your control.
So goodbye, Beck Oliver.
And I hope to never see you again.
Without love,
Jade
Author's Note: Thanks for reading! Please review and tell me what y'all think!
