This is the idea I came up with after talking about chapter 359 with my friend…

I own nothing, sorry.

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There was a monster walking the streets.

It was a horrible monster, capable of slaughtering each and every one of the civilians in the city that surrounded it. With a mere wave of its hand, ten could die. With a mere rising of its eye brow, it could kill at least two.

Luckily for the members of this particular city, the monster was quite possibly the laziest man in existence.

The monster's name was Stark, and he was not only an arrancar, but also the first sword, the Primero Espada, to use hia terminology, of the ex-shinigami captain's new order of evil. He held this rank for a reason, he was incredibly powerful, plain and simple.

As we will learn in a minute, this is a great understatement.

His rank, power, or understatement thereof isn't important; what is really important is what he is doing as he strolls down the streets of the city, moving invisible to the human eye as he walks on the air over their heads.

"let's see…566, dang it, what was the rest of it?" Stark mumbled to himself as he pressed keys on the phone he had stolen from an unobservant businessman. "Oh yes! 566-5666!" He presses in the keys with a speed he usually saved for times when he was in combat, wanting the call to be sent through quickly.

For once, the man waited with baited breath, the seconds between the rings stretching out into minutes, hours…

"Hello, this is pizza hut, This is Samantha, is this for pickup or delivery?" The responding voice was overly perky to such an extent that it had to be faked.

"This is for pickup at your shaker branch." He answered, glancing up at an intersection to check which way to go. His eyes traveled between the street names, the street light and the man who had glanced up and seen him before scurrying away.

"Ok, would you like to hear our specials or do you know what you want to order?" The man rushed into a side street as Stark turned, heading down the street to his left.

"I'd like to order one large cheese pizza, hand tossed, with…" There was the briefest of pauses as Stark turned to face the shinigami charging him from behind. It took merely a moment to recognize him as the true form of the man he had just seen rush off the main road. The rush had probably been to get out of sight so he could transfer from his gigai.

It took barely that much time for Stark to send a blast of pure hollow energy out of the hole in his chest, a gargantuan cylinder of pure destruction that incinerated the shinigami, leaving only the bottom of his feet to fall to the ground.

"..a two liter of diet Coke and one of Sprite. Ooh, and some breadsticks."

"Ok, I got you down for one large hand tossed cheese, 2 two liters, and breadsticks, will this be all today?"

"Yeah." Stark nodded, even though he was nowhere near the women he was talking to. Below him, a young man tripped over the invisible but very corporeal legs, falling into the road and in front of a car.

"Ok, your total comes to 21 dollars and 83 cents, and it will be ready in about 30 minutes. Thank you for shopping at piz…" Stark cut her off by hanging up. Under him, a car crashes into the car that hit the young man.

Pocketing the phone, Stark looked up to the sky, smoke from the now 6-car pileup below him rising into the air. He smiles wistfully, then says "30 minutes, eh? All the time in the world."

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As said above, kinda random.

Primero Espada literally translates to first sword in spanish, which is weird. In Rurouni Kenshin, Shishio has his minions titled "the 10 swords," or the "Juppongatana." Who the hell names ranks after swords?