Four years ago, there were very few things that Emma Swan cared about.
She can list them on one hand- her laptop (which held everything that she knew, both about herself and other people), her Louboutins (which she had splurged an insane amount of money on), her pet hamster (that had died after three months, poor little thing), and her car (but she would never admit this one to herself anyway).
They were all very important- they were the only things that she would take with her when she traveled, switching from city to city, finding a new place to be stored in each apartment or condo she lived in.
And yet, other than the hamster, she sometimes felt that she could throw it all away and never look back.
That perhaps she didn't care about them at all.
/
Four years ago, there were very few people that Emma Swan cared about.
She can list them on two fingers- herself (because if she didn't, nobody else would), and Neal (though this one goes with the car- it's better left unsaid).
He was completely unimportant- she barely thought of him and if she did have to list the people she cared about, she would list him on one particular middle finger- not that, you know, that means anything.
She tried to throw him away- but that didn't work out too well so she just ignored it, filling his absence with other men and late nights and an unhealthy amount of rum.
Who needed a family anyway?
/
Four years ago, there were very few holidays that Emma Swan celebrated.
She doesn't need any appendages to count these- she celebrated her birthday and that was all.
With one cupcake and one candle, as she had for the past twenty-six years of her life.
She thought, occasionally, about buying another hamster but in the end, there was no point- it would die eventually anyway, malnourished by the lack of love she had to give.
Birthdays were stupid. They just marked another year gone before she died and nobody cared.
/
However, it is not four years ago.
It is now, and Emma Swan has more people and things and holidays to celebrate than she knows what to do with.
She has a family- that's right, she does- and friends and Neal and her red jacket and Henry's fairy tale book and Christmases and Thanksgivings and birthdays, birthdays birthdays, and who cares about those stupid Louboutins anyway, honestly, they pinched her toes like nobody's business.
She has something that she never dreamt of having four years ago.
And though she won't admit it- though she complains about the struggles and constant hardships and curses that she has to break- though she complains about being the Savior- she can't leave them.
She can't give up this world, this life that she has longed for.
She will not give it up.
Because four years ago, Emma Swan had nothing.
(She's being honest here- she didn't care much about that hamster anyway.)
But that's okay.
Because this year, it's all changing.
Because this year, she has family.
Hello, all :) This is my very first fan fiction ever! I'd love some feedback on how it was- if you enjoyed it or not, anything at all.
Thank you so much for reading-
-BC
