Everytime

//Song fic about Letty after she left Dom. She realizes something really important. Based on the song "Everytime" by that skank Britney Spears. Told from Letty's POV. Tell me what you think. //

I left Dom.

You don't need remind me. I know it was the stupidest thing that I have ever done. It's even stupider than the time when I was thirteen and I "Borrowed" my mom's boyfriend's car and wrecked it. He found out and he hit me, a lot. And that was a pretty stupid thing to do. But this, this is far worse. I mean, what am I going to do without him? How am I going to be able to watch flirt with all the hoes? I don't even know why I would care. I left him. He didn't leave me.

But I need him. I need him to help me survive all the shit that's going to come my way. What am I going to do without him? He's been my rock since I could remember. He's been there for me when I needed him. He rescued me from every one of my mom's demented boyfriends.

//You notice me And take my hand So why are we? In strangers' land And love is strong Why carry on without me

And every time I try to fly I fall Without my wings I feel so small I guess I need you baby And every time I see you in my dreams I see your face, it's haunting me I guess I need you baby, oh//

I tried to fly, and be without him. I knew that I needed to be independent. It's not that I depended on him all the time. I know how to take car of myself, but I just couldn't imagine life without him. It's too much of a change. And I don't like change. I needed him, he kept me sane.

He used to be so great. He used to tell me that he loved all the time. He changed though, and you know how I don't like change. He stopped treating me like I was his "Queen". He was just acting like I was another one of the guys. The only time that he actually acted like he loved me was when we were fucking. We weren't "Making Love" if that's what you want to call it. We were just having sex. No saying "I love you" after we were done. No hugging me. He just rolled over so that his back was facing me.

He use to be gone countless nights, then, he'd stumble in piss ass drunk and just plop down in bed. He didn't even explain to me where he had been. No "I'm sorry I was out so late Letty, but it's nothing to worry about." None of that. He'd just get it on with me and then go to sleep. So, naturally, I assumed he was cheating. I asked Vince about it, he said that it wasn't true. That Dom wasn't sleeping around on me. He was right. Because Dom told Vince everything. No matter what it was, Dom told him. So I let it go.

//I make believe that you are here Is the only way that I see clear What have I done? You seem to move on easy

And every time I try to fly I fall Without my wings I feel so small I guess I need you baby And every time I see you in my dreams I see your face, it's haunting me I guess I need you baby//

Then, all of a sudden, Dom got better again. He started acting like a boyfriend again. He was acting the same way he did when we first got together. It was like we broke up and we were back together again. He told me that he loved me again, but I wasn't taking it. I wasn't going to let what happened happen again. I didn't want to be hurt again. So, the next morning, I packed my things and walked. I left him. Now, as I sit here, I think about how stupid I was.

I tried fly and I fell.

//I may have made it rain Please forgive me My weakness caused you pain And the sun smiles on me

Oh, at night I pray That soon you'll face will fade away//

I see him every now and then at the races. He looks at me longingly. As if telling me he still loves me and that I can come back anytime. He'll take me in in a heart beat. We exchange a few words. It's usually the same thing, "How ya livin'?" Nothing more, nothing less.

Now, after mentally beating myself, I'm at the races. I've got to go back. I can't live without him, and, as much as I try to convince myself, I love him. No matter what. It's been two weeks since I walked and I still need him. Just like I've always needed him.

"Hey." He said when I walked up to him.

"How ya livin'?" I asked him, as usual. He frowned. I could see that he wasn't doing so well.

//And every time I try to fly I fall Without my wings I feel so small I guess I need you baby And every time I see you in my dreams I see your face, it's haunting me I guess I need you baby

After all//

I couldn't take it anymore. I had to tell him.

"I love you." I said looking into his big brown eyes. They seemed to twinkle when I told him. He looked down at me and smiled. He leaned his head down and he kissed me.

"I love you too." He said smiling.

He pulled me to him and held me. I started to cry. He was whispering sweet nothings in my ear, trying to get me to stop crying. "I'm sorry." I whispered over and over. He led me to his car and we got in. Mia would take my car to the house. We drove to his house. He took me upstairs and laid me on his bed. He lay down next to me and wrapped his arms around me.

"I'm sorry." I whispered again.

"Shhhh, it's okay. Just tell me one thing, why?"

I looked at him, trying to find a reason why. I honestly didn't know why. I was just so frustrated over what had happened with him acting like I wasn't his girlfriend and then him all of a sudden remembering that he had one. Expecting me to act like nothing happened. I was frustrated.

"I honestly don't know why. All that matters is that we're together." I said.

The way we should always be, happy.