Title: Broken Wing
Author: Haruka xHaruka17x@a...
Disclaimer: I don't own GW.
Pairing: 1x3(past), 1+3
Rating: NC-17
Warning: OOC, AU, angst
Notes: The song is If you knew what I knew by BSB, but I'm using it as if Heero is singing it so i'm not sure if this is a songfic or what. Helped by Silva Noir, a very good friend that I cherish. =) Enjoy and Please R&R. Hope you enjoy!!
~~=Flashbacks
**=Thoughts
The smoke lingered in the air that night from those who sat at the back tables, misty lights glinting off the green glass of clinking half full beer bottles. Others roamed about or stood with their arms crossed in front as techies and roadies made sound checks and fine tuned guitars and amps.
Heero waited impatiently just beyond the stage, inspecting his audience for the night.
--------
The small audience cheered as Heero took his stand at the microphone. Guitar in hand, Heero wore black leather pants and a loose black t-shirt, matching his black and silver guitar. The band started the music, and Heero started singing.
"Seven a.m., thinkin' 'bout you, wonderin' if the thoughts I'm feelin', you're feelin' too, like a newborn child, soft to the touch, baby, is it possible, to love someone so much?"
As he remembered why he had written this song, one of many...that were for, him.
"I wish I may, I wish I might, be that certain someone, you wish for every night"
~Heero walked with Trowa, hand in hand. Heero felt content. They walked towards their apartment.
"If you knew what I knew, you wouldn't say what you said, if you knew what I knew, we'd be together instead, of you breaking my heart, with things that aren't true, my baby (yes) my baby, yes my baby, knew what I knew, ...ah..."
~Heero kissed Trowa before entering their home..
"Time passes by, the only tears I cry, feel with this illusion, fears I have inside, like a lost soul, I feel like I'm all alone, if only I could feel your pain, within your heart of soul"
~They stumbled around as their tongues hungrily danced with each other as they made their way to their bedroom, clothes covering the floor as they did.
"I wish I may, I wish I might, be that certain someone, you wish for every night..."
~ Heero was kissing and licking at Trowa's chest, neck, and lips. He slowly and gently entered Trowa. Heero looked at Trowa's flush and pleasure filled face as they made love.
"If you knew what I knew, you wouldn't say what you said, if you knew what I knew, we'd be together instead, of you breaking' my heart, with things that aren't true, my baby, yes, if you knew what I knew"
~After their lovemaking, Heero's arm was wrapped around Trowa, who was falling asleep on his chest as Heero brushed his hand through his hair. 'I love you' Heero told him. Trowa quickly looked up, seeing Heero's sincerity in his eyes. Trowa quickly sat up. 'You can't love me, I don't know how to feel' 'Yes you do, when we make love koi' 'No, I don't feel anything its just sex...that's all' 'But Trowa, I...don't you love me?' 'No, I don't' Trowa left the room. Heero watched him walk out of his life...
"You would never have said what you said, if you knew what i knew, my baby, we would be together instead, baby, if you knew...." Heero finished the song, as he tried not the let his tears fall from the memory of Trowa leaving him. How he loved him so.. How he still madly did...
He bowed and walked off stage. The crowd applauded for an uncore.
"Hey Heero, someone wants to talk to you" Heero's beautiful manager Silva told him. He nodded as she pointed to where the person was. Heero walked towards the bar only to meet an all too familiar face, Trowa.
"Hello Heero..." Trowa said quietly. "You look good...I liked your song..." Trowa said timidly.
"Trowa..." Heero couldn't believe it. After over a year of pain because of him, he came back...why?
Heero's face suddenly turned from disbelief and pain to anger filled with rage.
"What do you want?" He asked in a deep monotone. "Why are you here?"
"Because...I wanted to know if it was true.... And I miss you..." Trowa finished his sentence and looked up in Heero's eyes with actual tears swimming in his. Heero was shocked and took a step back. He quickly regainedu control and frowned.
"Know if what was true?" He asked. Trowa took a step closer to him.
"If your songs...are about us...me" Trowa told him, taking one of Heero's hands in his.
Heero looked away. "Yes..." He answered. But then looked back up at Trowa. "But you don't feel, and you don't love...it was just sex" Heero said in a low threatening voice as he yanked his hand back, making Trowa flinch.
"I'm sorry...I didn't...Heero I was scared. No one ever cared or loved me in anyway before you and.... It did mean something to me...more then you know, more then I ever let you know. Can we go talk somewhere? Please?" Trowa pleaded, looking so fragile Heero's eyes soften, he looked away ashamed of the effect Trowa still had on him. He nodded.
Trowa followed Heero to a tiny room in the back that looked like a dressing room.
"Heero? Is everything ok?" A voice asked. Heero turned towards the woman.
"Yes Silva thank you" He said, the woman nodded and returned to playing with her cat that she carried around everywhere named Quatre.
Heero closed the door behind him and sat down on a stool.
"Talk" He said. Trowa nodded and started.
"I miss you Heero...I know its been a long time and you probably found some else but.." Suddenly Trowa did something Heero would of never thought possible; Trowa ran to him and hugged him tightly, slid down Heero's body and tightly hugged him at his waist and started to cry.
"Heero...I love you..." Heero's eyes widen. He didn't know what to do. Trowa's teary face looked up at him. "I love you so much....I was too proud and too stupid ....I just left....please...don't hate me Heero...I couldn't take that" Trowa buried his face in Heero's shirt once more. "I'll understand if you want nothing to do with me but please...don't hate me..." Trowa begged.
Heero gently push him off and kneeled down if front of him. He brushed some tears away with his thumb on Trowa's flushed face.
"I don't hate you...You just hurt me so much..." Heero said trying not to get angry. This was new to him, Trowa had 'never' showed any emotions outside of the bed and this was breaking his heart to see him cry. Trowa then suddenly lunched forward and kissed him hungrily. Trowa abruptly pulled back.
"Did you...did you find someone else?" Trowa asked as more tears threatened to invade his eyes.
"No." Heero told him. Trowa smiled and kissed him once more. But Heero gently pushed him away.
"Heero?" Trowa questioned, as he watched him get up and walk towards to door.
Heero was so confused he didn't know what to do. "I need to think Trowa, this is... just so sudden" Trowa sadly nodded. Heero left the room.
*Heero please take me back...* He thought watching him leave and close the door, leaving him alone.
--------
"Silva? Can I talk to you?" Heero ask, as she was playing with her cat Quatre.
"Sure. What's up?" She asked.
"Should I take Trowa back?" He asked.
"Well. Do you really love him? It seems like you do, you've been writing a lot of songs about him. If you think it will only cause more misery, than don't do it. But if you think there's even the smallest chance of it working out, I say go for it" She said.
"I don't know its so fast...and he's...emotional now its great but..."Heero was so confused.
"Well, love is a confusing thing. If it was easy to understand and always went smoothly, there wouldn't be so many tearjerking movies or soap operas. The problem was him denying his feelings for you and how it hurt you that he did. Don't punish him by putting him through the same sort of agony" Silva told him, holding one of his hands in hers.
Heero nodded. "Thanks Sil, your always there for me." Heero stood and hugged his best friend.
"Meow?" They looked down to see little Neko Quatre watching then, sitting down, wagging his tail. Silva picked him up and walk away.
--------
Heero returned to the tiny room he had left Trowa, only to find it empty.
* Where did he go? * Heero asked himself.
He walked out of the room and made his way to the bar. His eyes searched to room but no sign of Trowa's slender tall figure...
--------
A week had past since Trowa had come to see him. Heero had already made his decision but Trowa had disappeared. Trowa had given him time to think. But Heero and his band were soon leaving for another gig somewhere close but not in this town. Heero hoped that Trowa would return before he had to leave.
Heero laid down in his hotel room bed, relaxing after an other let performance last night, when a knock sounded at the door. He answered it quickly.
"Tr...Oh hi Sil, what's up?" Heero asked, as Silva was standing on the other side of the door with Quatre in her arms.
"Hey Heero, have you gone over the new songs? I like them, but you just need to work a little bit more on this one" Silva told him, handing him a folder. He nodded.
"Ok well I'll cya later" Silva said then left. Heero closed the door and turned to go back to bed when another knock sounded at the door.
*What did she forget* Heero thought as he flew open the door expecting Silva only to find Trowa standing in the doorway.
"Trowa..." Heero's eyes soften. Trowa odded slightly.
"Hi Heero...um, can I come in?" Trowa asked, then taking notice of Heero only wearing boxers and he blushed slightly.
Heero closed the door behind Trowa and followed him into the small living room. Trowa sat down on the sofa as Heero sat down on the loveseat.
"I'm sorry I just left the other night...I just thought you needed time to think" Trowa said, unable to look at Heero.
"I'll take you back on one condition," Heero said surprising him. Trowa's head shot up and looked at him. "You ever hurt me like that again. I've never and will never do that to you Trowa. Please don't hurt me again..." Heero finished softly.
Trowa rose and quickly made his way to him, and hugged him.
"I'll never hurt you again. I swear it Heero" Trowa said looking into his eyes. Heero nodded and kissed him deeply.
"Heero? Will you hold me? Like you used to do?" Trowa asked, Heero smiled and nodded. He lead Trowa to the bed and once Trowa was only clad in his boxers as well, they laid down on the bed together. Heero's arms wrapped around Trowa's body, as Trowa's head rested happily on his chest. They fell asleep content, and both dreamt of love to come...
OWARI
Author: Haruka xHaruka17x@a...
Disclaimer: I don't own GW.
Pairing: 1x3(past), 1+3
Rating: NC-17
Warning: OOC, AU, angst
Notes: The song is If you knew what I knew by BSB, but I'm using it as if Heero is singing it so i'm not sure if this is a songfic or what. Helped by Silva Noir, a very good friend that I cherish. =) Enjoy and Please R&R. Hope you enjoy!!
~~=Flashbacks
**=Thoughts
The smoke lingered in the air that night from those who sat at the back tables, misty lights glinting off the green glass of clinking half full beer bottles. Others roamed about or stood with their arms crossed in front as techies and roadies made sound checks and fine tuned guitars and amps.
Heero waited impatiently just beyond the stage, inspecting his audience for the night.
--------
The small audience cheered as Heero took his stand at the microphone. Guitar in hand, Heero wore black leather pants and a loose black t-shirt, matching his black and silver guitar. The band started the music, and Heero started singing.
"Seven a.m., thinkin' 'bout you, wonderin' if the thoughts I'm feelin', you're feelin' too, like a newborn child, soft to the touch, baby, is it possible, to love someone so much?"
As he remembered why he had written this song, one of many...that were for, him.
"I wish I may, I wish I might, be that certain someone, you wish for every night"
~Heero walked with Trowa, hand in hand. Heero felt content. They walked towards their apartment.
"If you knew what I knew, you wouldn't say what you said, if you knew what I knew, we'd be together instead, of you breaking my heart, with things that aren't true, my baby (yes) my baby, yes my baby, knew what I knew, ...ah..."
~Heero kissed Trowa before entering their home..
"Time passes by, the only tears I cry, feel with this illusion, fears I have inside, like a lost soul, I feel like I'm all alone, if only I could feel your pain, within your heart of soul"
~They stumbled around as their tongues hungrily danced with each other as they made their way to their bedroom, clothes covering the floor as they did.
"I wish I may, I wish I might, be that certain someone, you wish for every night..."
~ Heero was kissing and licking at Trowa's chest, neck, and lips. He slowly and gently entered Trowa. Heero looked at Trowa's flush and pleasure filled face as they made love.
"If you knew what I knew, you wouldn't say what you said, if you knew what I knew, we'd be together instead, of you breaking' my heart, with things that aren't true, my baby, yes, if you knew what I knew"
~After their lovemaking, Heero's arm was wrapped around Trowa, who was falling asleep on his chest as Heero brushed his hand through his hair. 'I love you' Heero told him. Trowa quickly looked up, seeing Heero's sincerity in his eyes. Trowa quickly sat up. 'You can't love me, I don't know how to feel' 'Yes you do, when we make love koi' 'No, I don't feel anything its just sex...that's all' 'But Trowa, I...don't you love me?' 'No, I don't' Trowa left the room. Heero watched him walk out of his life...
"You would never have said what you said, if you knew what i knew, my baby, we would be together instead, baby, if you knew...." Heero finished the song, as he tried not the let his tears fall from the memory of Trowa leaving him. How he loved him so.. How he still madly did...
He bowed and walked off stage. The crowd applauded for an uncore.
"Hey Heero, someone wants to talk to you" Heero's beautiful manager Silva told him. He nodded as she pointed to where the person was. Heero walked towards the bar only to meet an all too familiar face, Trowa.
"Hello Heero..." Trowa said quietly. "You look good...I liked your song..." Trowa said timidly.
"Trowa..." Heero couldn't believe it. After over a year of pain because of him, he came back...why?
Heero's face suddenly turned from disbelief and pain to anger filled with rage.
"What do you want?" He asked in a deep monotone. "Why are you here?"
"Because...I wanted to know if it was true.... And I miss you..." Trowa finished his sentence and looked up in Heero's eyes with actual tears swimming in his. Heero was shocked and took a step back. He quickly regainedu control and frowned.
"Know if what was true?" He asked. Trowa took a step closer to him.
"If your songs...are about us...me" Trowa told him, taking one of Heero's hands in his.
Heero looked away. "Yes..." He answered. But then looked back up at Trowa. "But you don't feel, and you don't love...it was just sex" Heero said in a low threatening voice as he yanked his hand back, making Trowa flinch.
"I'm sorry...I didn't...Heero I was scared. No one ever cared or loved me in anyway before you and.... It did mean something to me...more then you know, more then I ever let you know. Can we go talk somewhere? Please?" Trowa pleaded, looking so fragile Heero's eyes soften, he looked away ashamed of the effect Trowa still had on him. He nodded.
Trowa followed Heero to a tiny room in the back that looked like a dressing room.
"Heero? Is everything ok?" A voice asked. Heero turned towards the woman.
"Yes Silva thank you" He said, the woman nodded and returned to playing with her cat that she carried around everywhere named Quatre.
Heero closed the door behind him and sat down on a stool.
"Talk" He said. Trowa nodded and started.
"I miss you Heero...I know its been a long time and you probably found some else but.." Suddenly Trowa did something Heero would of never thought possible; Trowa ran to him and hugged him tightly, slid down Heero's body and tightly hugged him at his waist and started to cry.
"Heero...I love you..." Heero's eyes widen. He didn't know what to do. Trowa's teary face looked up at him. "I love you so much....I was too proud and too stupid ....I just left....please...don't hate me Heero...I couldn't take that" Trowa buried his face in Heero's shirt once more. "I'll understand if you want nothing to do with me but please...don't hate me..." Trowa begged.
Heero gently push him off and kneeled down if front of him. He brushed some tears away with his thumb on Trowa's flushed face.
"I don't hate you...You just hurt me so much..." Heero said trying not to get angry. This was new to him, Trowa had 'never' showed any emotions outside of the bed and this was breaking his heart to see him cry. Trowa then suddenly lunched forward and kissed him hungrily. Trowa abruptly pulled back.
"Did you...did you find someone else?" Trowa asked as more tears threatened to invade his eyes.
"No." Heero told him. Trowa smiled and kissed him once more. But Heero gently pushed him away.
"Heero?" Trowa questioned, as he watched him get up and walk towards to door.
Heero was so confused he didn't know what to do. "I need to think Trowa, this is... just so sudden" Trowa sadly nodded. Heero left the room.
*Heero please take me back...* He thought watching him leave and close the door, leaving him alone.
--------
"Silva? Can I talk to you?" Heero ask, as she was playing with her cat Quatre.
"Sure. What's up?" She asked.
"Should I take Trowa back?" He asked.
"Well. Do you really love him? It seems like you do, you've been writing a lot of songs about him. If you think it will only cause more misery, than don't do it. But if you think there's even the smallest chance of it working out, I say go for it" She said.
"I don't know its so fast...and he's...emotional now its great but..."Heero was so confused.
"Well, love is a confusing thing. If it was easy to understand and always went smoothly, there wouldn't be so many tearjerking movies or soap operas. The problem was him denying his feelings for you and how it hurt you that he did. Don't punish him by putting him through the same sort of agony" Silva told him, holding one of his hands in hers.
Heero nodded. "Thanks Sil, your always there for me." Heero stood and hugged his best friend.
"Meow?" They looked down to see little Neko Quatre watching then, sitting down, wagging his tail. Silva picked him up and walk away.
--------
Heero returned to the tiny room he had left Trowa, only to find it empty.
* Where did he go? * Heero asked himself.
He walked out of the room and made his way to the bar. His eyes searched to room but no sign of Trowa's slender tall figure...
--------
A week had past since Trowa had come to see him. Heero had already made his decision but Trowa had disappeared. Trowa had given him time to think. But Heero and his band were soon leaving for another gig somewhere close but not in this town. Heero hoped that Trowa would return before he had to leave.
Heero laid down in his hotel room bed, relaxing after an other let performance last night, when a knock sounded at the door. He answered it quickly.
"Tr...Oh hi Sil, what's up?" Heero asked, as Silva was standing on the other side of the door with Quatre in her arms.
"Hey Heero, have you gone over the new songs? I like them, but you just need to work a little bit more on this one" Silva told him, handing him a folder. He nodded.
"Ok well I'll cya later" Silva said then left. Heero closed the door and turned to go back to bed when another knock sounded at the door.
*What did she forget* Heero thought as he flew open the door expecting Silva only to find Trowa standing in the doorway.
"Trowa..." Heero's eyes soften. Trowa odded slightly.
"Hi Heero...um, can I come in?" Trowa asked, then taking notice of Heero only wearing boxers and he blushed slightly.
Heero closed the door behind Trowa and followed him into the small living room. Trowa sat down on the sofa as Heero sat down on the loveseat.
"I'm sorry I just left the other night...I just thought you needed time to think" Trowa said, unable to look at Heero.
"I'll take you back on one condition," Heero said surprising him. Trowa's head shot up and looked at him. "You ever hurt me like that again. I've never and will never do that to you Trowa. Please don't hurt me again..." Heero finished softly.
Trowa rose and quickly made his way to him, and hugged him.
"I'll never hurt you again. I swear it Heero" Trowa said looking into his eyes. Heero nodded and kissed him deeply.
"Heero? Will you hold me? Like you used to do?" Trowa asked, Heero smiled and nodded. He lead Trowa to the bed and once Trowa was only clad in his boxers as well, they laid down on the bed together. Heero's arms wrapped around Trowa's body, as Trowa's head rested happily on his chest. They fell asleep content, and both dreamt of love to come...
OWARI
