A/N: Just a drabble that is the direct result of watching the season finale to Mr. Harmon's show like six times in a row.
Jeff couldn't wait to leave. It wasn't that he was unhappy about the fact that they'd saved Greendale. He was happy. Thrilled even. It wasn't that he was annoyed at anyone or anything per se. But he had to get the hell out of there. It wasn't even eight o'clock but he was done. Done with people wanting to talk to him. Done with Dave Matthews music. Done working so hard to avoid seeing her. Avoid seeing her in this new light. Seeing her as a grown woman that could stand up to him. Little Annie Adderall was all grown up and he didn't know why the realization had hit him so hard.
He'd seen it happening over the years. Small things. Like the way she narrowed her eyes at him when he asked her for something instead of just giving a squeak and blindly agreeing. The way she dressed, still so proper but now in slacks and heels instead of the little skirts and flats she'd always worn before. Her slow change from perky hyperactivity to graceful determination. And then she'd given a 'Winger Speech' and all he'd been able to think about was making her a real Winger. She'd been his friend for years. Years where they'd danced around their chemistry and their feelings. Years where he'd felt like a dirty old man every time he noticed how breathtakingly beautiful she was. But something had changed when she'd looked him in the eyes and told him it was okay to want what he wanted. He knew she'd been referring to Britta. But in that moment he knew. All he wanted was her. Not little Annie Adderall. No, all he wanted. All he'd ever wanted was her. Annie. And that wasn't something to be ashamed of anymore.
Glancing around he saw that Britta and Duncan were talking to Shirley and Hickey. He spared a small smile for Britta; glad that she seemed as relieved as he was that their panic-induced engagement was off. Abed and Rachel were laughing about something. Probably narrating the lives of everyone they saw. He didn't see the Dean or Annie anywhere. They were probably going to a storage room for food or something. Taking the opportunity to get the hell out of Dodge without anyone noticing, he practically ran for the faculty parking lot.
He'd taken two long strides down the empty hallway when a voice halted his progress.
"Jeffrey, where exactly are you going?" The Dean's voice was stern and full of knowing judgement.
Jeff's shoulders tensed and without turning around he replied tersely, "Home. I'm tired. It's been a weird day."
But the Dean blithely ignored the warning tone and approached him. Standing in front of Jeff he looked up and put a hand on his arm. Gently squeezing the muscles hidden under his shirt absently, as if from habit more than anything. "Is this about what happened in the basement?" he asked softly.
Shrugging the Dean's hand off, Jeff opened his mouth to respond with his characteristic wit and eloquence, "What? No. What? Huh? I mean. Pssh. Nothing happened. I mean. Yeah. What?"
Dean Pelton simply raised one eyebrow in a knowing manner and tilted his head to the side. "Oh something happened all right," he said with a small smile. "And I think I know what it was. But Jeffrey. You really shouldn't leave like this. We're all celebrating and we all have you to thank for saving our school. Why would you sneak out?"
Jeff's shoulders slumped and he sighed, "Look, Craig. It's just. I can't be here right now. I need to go home. And drink." Realizing what he'd said, he swiftly corrected. "Think. I meant think. I need to go home and think." Casting around for something else, anything else to say, he hurried babbled on. "About next year's lesson plans. Since there's going to be a next year now. No time like the present. Anyway thanks for your concern and I'm sure I'll see you over the summer, neighbor. Have a good night." Stepping around the Dean he swiftly walked out into the warm evening. Thankful that the Dean hadn't said anything more to keep him there.
He didn't hear the Dean mutter under his breath about the two biggest idiots he'd ever met.
As he arrived home he unlocked the door and entered with a sigh. Throwing his keys and wallet on the table by the front door, he toed off his shoes and padded over to pour himself a scotch. He downed it in one swallow and refilled the tumbler. Finishing that as well he refilled a third time before walking into the living room and setting the bottle on the coffee table. He collapsed onto the couch and stared into the amber scotch as if the answers he was looking for were hidden somewhere in the swirling liquid. With a sigh he leaned back and narrowed his eyes in irritation. Reaching behind his he grabbed the throw pillow lodged behind his back, intending to toss it to the other side of the couch.
It had been over a year since she had brought the pillow over. It was one of the many decorations she'd brought to spruce his condo up for that awful Christmas party. When the party had ended he'd reached up to take down the purple fabric above his window but had stopped when a small white hand had landed on his arm.
"Don't," she's said with a bright smile. "Leave them. They make your place look like a home. I want you to keep them."
He'd narrowed his eyes at her and spoke the thought as it formed, " You didn't bring these from your apartment. You bought them specifically to decorate my condo." He didn't add any inflection to change the statement to a question. They both knew there was no way he was wrong.
"Well of course I did," she'd laughed in the musical way she had. Her eyes narrowed just the slightest bit as she'd looked at him "They're part of my present to you. Didn't you see the bags I brought them in? So you'll keep them, right? It would be rude not to accept a Christmas present."
She could have used the Disney eyes and he would have been powerless to resist. But she hadn't. She's simply told him what she wanted in calm, certain tones. With a sigh he'd dropped his hand from the fabric. "Fine," he'd conceded. "But the scarf over the lampshade goes. It's a fire hazard."
Jeff opened his eyes, unsurprised to find that he'd been stroking the fabric of the pillow. With a growl he threw the offending item across the room and finished his scotch. Stupid Annie with her stupid beautiful face and her stupid amazing body and her stupid awesome personality. This was her fault. If she weren't so...her then he wouldn't be so utterly in lo- lust with her and that stupid machine wouldn't have responded to his feelings for her. Drinking directly from the bottle rather than pouring yet another glass, he pulled his phone from his pocket. He unlocked the screen after two tries and looked at the blurry icons. Four new texts. He hadn't felt his phone vibrate. He glanced at the time. One in the morning. Huh. How had so much time passed?
One from the Dean letting him know that if he needed to talk he was right next door. As if Jeff could ever forget. Two from Shirley scolding him for leaving before she got to thank him and letting him know she was proud of him. One from Britta saying basically the same thing. She was proud of him. She hoped they were cool. Letting him know she would be happy to therapize him if he wanted since she had a theory about what had happened. As if he wanted to hear her no-doubt awful theory.
Rolling his eyes, Jeff went to bed. He had no desire to think. Just wanted to be unconscious. Hopefully when he woke up these stupid feelings would be back in their box. With chains around it. Encased in cement. At the bottom of the ocean. And he could go back to pretending she was just his friend.
Annie hesitated before walking into Study Room F. Six days ago they had saved Greendale.
She had been happy. Euphoric, really, at knowing that her home was safe. But even knowing that they had driven Subway away and reached their goal hadn't been enough to really boost her spirits. She'd looked across the room and seen Jeff and Britta giving each other a high five with big smiles on their faces. Glowering at the two of them she had told Abed she would see him at home and had practically run in her haste to get the hell out of there. She'd just closed the door to the commons when she'd literally run into Dean Pelton, causing him to drop the bags of potato chips he'd been carrying. Annie'd exclaimed how sorry she was as she knelt to give him a hand picking them up.
"And where are you heading off to, Miss Edison?" The Dean had asked sternly.
"Oh I'm heading home. It's been a really strange day and I'm super tired." She'd lied with a perfectly straight face.
The Dean's face softened and she knew he'd seen right through her. "Annie, what's bothering you? I'd figure you would be the happiest person here after what just happened in the basement."
Confusion flickered across Annie's face before she figured out what he was saying. "Oh because I was leading the committee and we saved Greendale. Yes, Dean, I'm thrilled. Really. I'm just tired. Now that the adrenaline has run out I'm just exhausted."
The Dean raised an eyebrow and tilted his head as he looked at her. "No, Annie. That's not what I meant at all. Surely you know what...actually nevermind. It's not for me to say. You go home and get some rest. Now that the school is saved we still have finals next week. I'll see you around."
Annie had looked at him in confusion before shrugging and heading home. Opening the door she'd turned around and locked the door as was her habit. She'd walked into her bedroom, pulled her laptop from her backpack and plugged it into the charger before doing the same to her phone. Changing into a camisole and some lounging pants before she wandered back out of her room. She'd considered making herself a quick dinner but the thought of food made her nauseous so she'd simply sat in front of the television with a drink in her hand and tried to make her jealousy go away. She'd meant what she'd said. She may not agree with Jeff and Britta getting married. And she was honest enough with herself to realize that it wasn't only that she thought they would make each other miserable. She'd moved past her school-girl crush on Jeff but instead of leaving her entirely, her feelings had simply grown stronger over the years. There was something about Jeff Winger that electrified her. But she wasn't a child anymore. And she had to accept that he didn't reciprocate her feelings. And so, as difficult as it would be, she would fully support her friends. It had taken three Appletinis but she'd finally been tired enough to crawl in bed and fall asleep. Her last conscious thought was a wish that in the morning she would be able to let go of her lingering jealousy of Britta and focus on her own future.
That had been nearly a week ago. She hadn't spoken with anyone but Abed since then. And she'd only spoken to him in passing as she'd put all of her considerable energy and determination into aceing her finals. Her friends understood her. They knew to give her space during finals week and she appreciated that they'd been so respectful. But it was nearly over. Today was Thursday and as soon as the meeting was over she would be taking her last final for the year. This would be the last meeting of the Save Greendale Committee. With nothing holding them together, Annie was worried her friends would drift apart again. Shaking off the sad thought she pasted a cheerful smile on her face and waltzed into the room.
After the short meeting Jeff had practically run out the door and everyone else filed out more slowly. Annie took her time to make certain each of her things was in its designated space and when she was finished Britta was the only person left. Ignoring the nausea roiling through her, Annie composed herself and asked, "So Britta! Have you and Jeff decided on when you'll have the wedding?"
Britta's eyebrows drew together as she gave Annie a confused look. "Annie. Did you not hear? Jeff and I cancelled the engagement." Britta made a mental note of the way Annie's entire body sagged as she continued, "As a therapist in training I can see now that we were simply reacting negatively to the thought of losing Greendale and were grasping at a way to make an uncertain future feel like something we had control over. Jeff and I aren't in love. We're friends. We both know that. We aren't even sexually compatible. He was simply panicking and I reacted to his panic with wanting to do something to help him."
Annie couldn't describe what she was feeling. There was euphoria and fear and anger and confusion and a bone-deep relief all coursing through her. Her voice was far more steady than he thoughts as she casually replied, "No I hadn't heard. Well, are you okay with that?"
Britta smiled at her friend. "More than okay. Like I said, there are no romantic feelings there. It was simply a bad reaction to fear of change. I thought Jeff had told everyone before he left the other night. Did he not talk to you?"
Annie's smile faltered. "No. I haven't actually spoken with him since we were in the basement. I left pretty early the other night though. I must have left before he got the chance to tell me is all." Corralling her spinning thoughts and ruthlessly quashing them down she took a few deep breaths and centered herself before looking back at Britta. "Well, I have one last final before I'm officially free for the summer so I'd better go. See ya!"
As she bustled out of the room Annie missed Britta's speculative gaze on her retreating form.
Britta ran into Abed in the parking lot as she was leaving. Grinning, she trotted over to him and gave a cheery wave. "Hey Abed! I was going to text you! Listen. We need to have a party just for us now that finals are over. You mind volunteering your apartment as a location?" Abed's eyes moved with tiny movements like he was watching actual calculations line up in the air between them. It was disconcerting so she interrupted him, "I was thinking Saturday. Do you think that's enough notice? I was hoping to have everyone from the Committee except for Chang since he's a bad guy again so fuck him."
Abed nodded as he thought about the logistics. That could work with his plans. He would have to talk to Annie but she loved having everyone over and her last final was today so she wouldn't mind. Yes. This could work very well. Just had to make sure the scene was properly set and apply a little leverage at just the right moment. "Cool," he said. "Cool cool cool."
