What Price Mercy
Summary: Keiki's POV, when he carried Keikei to the palace.
The scent of blood was sharp in his nose as he started to mount Hyouki. He paused, looking at the boy Kaiko carried in her arms. Blood still seeped from the wounds in his shoulder, and his face was pale with shock and pain. His senses as a kirin told him the same thing his senses as a man did.
The boy was dying. Unless he was treated soon, he would not survive.
His stomach was already churning, nausea making him feel ill. He wanted desperately to run from this place, to distance himself from the smell of blood. But...
The boy was dying. There was urgent news that needed to be taken care of immediately. There was information that only the boy Keikei could give them. There were things that needed to be done, things he needed to do for his Queen. But even more than those things, he was aware that he did not want the child to die. Just as he was aware that Youko wanted to save the boy, had asked for him to lend his shirei to the task. Just as he was aware that every second was precious, if he truly wished to save the child.
He was a creature of compassion, first and foremost. That instinct, combined with the wishes of his Queen, stopped him. He considered a moment, then stepped back from Hyouki's side. "Kaiko."
"Yes, Taiho?"
It took only moments for him to transform, leaving his human shape for his kirin one. He stepped free of the robes he wore. "Place the boy on my back. Then gather my clothing and sit, so that you can keep him from falling."
Hanyko's deep voice interrupted. "Taiho, the blood..."
"It cannot be helped. This the fastest way to get the boy to a healer." Truth be told, it smelled even worse in his kirin form. The reek of blood was terrible, and the miasma of despair and pain was nearly unbearable. "Do it. Hankyo, watch over Her Majesty, and wait for my call."
"As you wish, Taiho." The shirei melted into shadow.
Kaiko laid Keikei over his shoulders. The iron-sweet reek of blood burned in his nose. He felt it smear across his side, dripping sluggishly over his shoulder and foreleg. It took all of his willpower to prevent himself from collapsing, to stop the shudders that ran through his body and the nausea that made him feel faint, even in his beast form.
Kaiko gathered his clothing, then perched gingerly on his back and folded her arms and wings over the boy. "Hold on." He launched himself into the air, gained height, and raced toward the Palace.
He hadn't given her any orders to do so, but he could feel that Kaiko had placed some sort of pad or bandage over the boy's wounds, in an attempt to stop the bleeding, and to protect him from it. Of course, it was too late, but he knew she was trying to protect him, given that she was his Nyokai. Her purpose in life was to follow his orders and protect him.
It helped, but the flight was an agonizing one. The blood made him ill and dizzy, and the constant effort of focusing through the blood sickness it made his head hurt. He could feel the blood dripping, drying in tacky, sticky stains across his shoulders and legs and neck. He felt as if he was going to regurgitate his last meal, and violently at that. By the time the mountain came into view, his chest ached, his stomach was roiling, and his head felt stuffed full of cotton. He felt feverish and racked with shuddering chills all at the same time. Kaiko had one hand free, trying to soothe him with her gentle touch, but it didn't help. The last case of blood sickness that had even approached this level had occurred when Hankyo had been injured, just after his return from Hourai. He'd been drenched then, but he hadn't tried to fight the sickness as he was now.
Finally, they reached the mountain. He gathered what remained of his strength, though it hurt, and threw himself upward. It was fortunate he was not forced to walk the earth, or he would certainly have stumbled. Even as it was, by the time he emerged above the Cloud Sea, his vision was going black at the edges, and he was reeling in the air.
He heard shouts as someone noticed his approach, and oriented on them, half blind and ready to collapse. There were shouts of concern. Then his hooves touched level stone. He staggered, stumbled, reeled a few feet forward, into dimness and shadows, then collapsed. Kaiko leaped from his back as he fell, the boy held in her arms.
Freed of his burden, he let the shudders he had fought to suppress wrack his frame. There was movement around him, concerned voices calling out. Then someone knelt beside him. "Taiho? Taiho! What is wrong with you?" Movement, and someone called out. "There is blood on the Taiho. Summon the healer!" Words rippled away from him, a wave of sound.
To frame words even as thoughts was agonizing, but he forced it anyway. "Tend...the boy. He is...wounded."
He forced his eyes open, just as a guard rose and went to Kaiko. There was another shout, then two of the servants came running. More exclamations, and then they were leaving, most of the palace guards in tow, the sturdiest of them carrying Keikei's limp form in his arms.
He needed to deliver Youko's message, but he couldn't even stand. His head was pounding, and the world seemed to sway around him in long, sickening arcs. He groaned and laid his head upon the stone, fighting to retain consciousness.
"Taiho!" A familiar voice echoed in his ears, he forced his eyes open. The Imperial healer stood beside him, holding a bowl of scented warm water. His assistant carried a large blanket or robe folded over one arm.
By tradition, ruler and kirin shared a personal healer. Though the office was usually transferred to a new person on the death of the monarch, there had been no time after his previous queen's death. Youko had asked him about it after claiming the throne, and he had finally admitted that he was comfortable with the current physician, the man who had tended him when he had suffered the shitsudo. He dredged enough energy to tilt his head and acknowledge the man.
The physician knelt beside him. "My apologies Taiho, but I must clean off the worst of the blood before we do anything else."
He closed his eyes as the man drew out the rag and began to sponge the blood off of his shoulder and foreleg. The scent of flowers cut through the scent of blood and eased him a little. Slowly, his trembling eased. He still felt dizzy and sick, but no longer incoherent with it. The nausea eased a fraction. He inhaled, feeling weak, and managed to form words. "Kaiko."
"Taiho." The Nyokai stepped forward from the shadows she'd melted into when Keikei had been taken.
"The letter." It was harder than he'd thought it could be. He hadn't had this much trouble forming words since his release from Joyei's hands. "Give it to them."
With deft motions, she pulled the folded documents from the inner folds of his robes. His physician was still carefully sponging blood from his foreleg and motioned for his assistant to take it. The young woman did, her eyes widening as she gazed at it. "The seal of Her Majesty..."
"Yes." He forced his voice to remain steady, though the effort made his head ache and his vision go gray again. "There were...suspicious incidents...in Ei Province. A governor...Shokou...his men were seen...at the house where...that child was attacked. There is evidence...of something wrong. He may have...been involved...in the attack. Tell...the ministers."
He tried to give them more details, but even that much effort was exhausting, and his next effort to speak was met with the healer's hand on his flank. "Taiho...you must conserve your strength. We will inform the ministers." The healer laid the bloodied cloth back in the red-tinted water. "Take the Taiho's letter and his report to the ministers, and also to the palace general physicians. They can corroborate the Taiho's account with the boy if he recovers." He held out his hand.
The woman passed him the cloth, then bowed to both of them and turned away, following the path the guards had taken minutes before.
The physician turned to a serving woman who waited discretely nearby and gave her the bowl of water. "Dispose of this, and inform the guards to clear the corridors between here and the Taiho's quarters, immediately."
The woman nodded and hurried off. The healer turned back to him. "Taiho, we must move you to your rooms to rest. Are you capable of assuming human form at this time?"
The thought made his very bones ache, but he knew why it had to be done. He was far too ill to walk, and he could not be carried in his current form. "Yes."
The healer rose to his feet and shook out the cloth, a large blanket. He draped it over his body.
He closed his eyes and focused. It was hard, but finally his body responded, transforming from beast to man. Two minutes later, he lay naked upon the tiles of the Palace hallway, near the door to the entrance court. His body shuddered, protesting the forced change, and he groaned.
The healer knelt beside him once more, tucking the blanket firmly around his bare shoulders. "My apologies, Taiho. Is it possible for you to call your Nyokai or shirei?"
Kaiko was already materializing from the shadows she'd faded into after passing over the letter. He'd ordered all of his creatures to remain hidden unless needed, because they made servants and ministers nervous. Without a word, she bent, tucked the blanket a little further around him, and lifted him tenderly in her arms. Even ill as he was, shame flooded him, to be in this condition. The thought of being seen in such a state made him tremble with mortification. He recalled what he had once said to Youko. 'I do not wish to serve you while naked.' The truth was that he did not wish to be seen by anyone while so vulnerable and exposed.
The healer turned away. "I will go and make sure the corridors have been cleared. Please wait a few moments, then follow me." He sketched a bow that included both of them, then hurried away.
Kaiko waited as instructed, then took a few running steps to launch herself into the air. Flight was a smoother mode of transport than walking, but he still swallowed against nausea. The scent of blood clung to her, from where she had carried Keikei, and where she had tried to protect him from the blood dripping from the boy's wounds. His head was swimming as she turned the corridor into the Queen's wing, which also housed his quarters. His eyes were closed against vertigo, but he could hear the silence that indicated the halls were empty. That was a small mercy at least.
The doctor was waiting alone in his rooms when they arrived. He bowed, then gestured Kaiko toward the bathing area. "This way."
The tub had been filled, scented with floral scents and warmed. Someone must have told his servants what had happened. He let the doctor and Kaiko strip the blanket from him, then lower him gently into the tub.
The floral scents washed the last of the metallic blood odor out of his nose and soothed the despair and pain that had permeated his spirit. Kaiko and the physician supported him as he relaxed limply into the water. The healer held his head and shoulders out of the water while Kaiko washed his body, cleansing the last of the taint. He listened, as well as he could, but there was silence in his chambers, which meant the healer had sent away his personal servants.
That was fine with him. He hated being seen like this. He still remembered the ministers and servants that had been in and out of his chambers when he had suffered the shitsudo. He had drifted in and out of consciousness for much of it, but he clearly remembered the shame and humiliation of their presence in his lucid moments.
Finally he was cleaned. Kaiko helped him out, and the healer assisted him, drying and dressing him. The man's hands were gentle as he pulled the sleep shirt and robes over his chest, covering him. Then Kaiko carried him into his sleeping chambers and laid him in the bed. The healer vanished, then returned with a cup, the scent of a familiar herbal tisane wafting from it. "Please drink this, Taiho. It will ease your pain and dizziness, and help you sleep. Rest will speed your recovery the most."
The first few sips he was certain his body would rebel, though the tisane was far from ill-tasting. The lingering nausea made it difficult to swallow. But after a few sips, his stomach settled and his pain seemed to fade somewhat. The dizziness of his illness was replaced by the moderately more comfortable muzziness that was an effect of the herbs. His trembling eased and slumped, exhausted into his pillows. "The boy..."
"He is being tended. If you wish, I will go and see to him myself, Taiho. As long as you promise to rest." The healer fluffed his pillows and tucked the blanket more firmly over him. "For now, you must rest, Taiho. I fear your illness will require several days to recover from this time."
He wasn't in a position to argue the matter. He lay back, eyes closing as his head spun. He knew from experience that he would be unconscious in a few moments. The healer fussed with him a few moments more, then backed away. "I will leave you to sleep now. I will return in a few hours to inform you of the boy's condition." There was a rustle of cloth as the man bowed, then the quiet footsteps as the healer left him.
He lay still for a few moments, fighting sleep, then forced his eyes open. "Hyouki."
"Taiho." The shirei's head appeared from a shadow on the floor.
"Inform Her Majesty." He would have preferred to add a more detailed report, but his strength was fading, and he couldn't form the words.
"I shall. Sleep, Taiho." The shirei melted back into the darkness.
Kaiko settled at his side, gently stroking his mane. "Rest, Taiho."
"Yes." His eyes closed as he surrendered himself to the soporific effects of the herbal concoction. His body felt oddly weightless as his mind fell into darkness.
He would be ill for a while. He regretted that he would be unable to help his Queen for some time. He wanted to go to her, and his soul ached at the thought that he could not. Still, he knew, as surely as he knew his own name, that Youko would approve of what he had done.
He would pay for this act of mercy, but he knew with utter certainty that he did not regret it, would not regret it. If the cost of saving the child's life was his own incapacitation, then it was a price he paid willingly. He knew Youko would understand.
He needed to heal, so he could return to her. He sighed and let himself fall into unconsciousness.
Author's Note: Because my brain insisted on filling in the spaces around Hyouki's comment that he was in poor condition because he carried the kid...
