Another journey begins. Old and new characters meet, old wounds reopen, new ones appear. Seat back, relax and get ready to start again. Stick with "Trickster" .

xx

L.

Choices

August 2017

"Are you aware of what you're demanding me?" Strange asked him in a stern voice. Loki nodded staring blankly at a bee buzzing in front of him. His lips tightened. "Lisa will forget everything. " Strange insisted. Loki blinked and frowned. "That is exactly what I want." He muttered.
"So, you want your daughter to grow up without a father, I suppose." Strange concluded harshly.
This time Loki turned to him and held his gaze on the Doctor. His eyes were blazing. "What I want", he hissed trough his teeth, " is her to grow immune from the risk of being like me."
"Therefore", Strange retorted, "as your father before you, you arrogate the right to decide for someone else's life - Odin son." He added, prodding him.
Loki's fists and jaws clamped tight. "Who do you think you're talking to, Strange?" Loki abruptly snapped," do you really think you're so much better than anyone else here, to have the power to judge and condemn every one?" Strange stood ahead of him, silent. I'm not asking you a therapy session, I'm asking you a favour." Loki went on. "If you don' t have the guts to do it, just tell and-"
"I thought", Strange cut in calmly, "you and I had some abilities in common. Am I wrong, Asgardian?"
"If I had been able to do it myself, I would not be here." Loki admitted coldly.
"Very well." Strange stated. "Let's do it then. There's no use in wasting more time." He surrendered.
"It will be alright." Loki whispered, while the magic was shaping up, spilling out of Strange's fingers. "Without me in your lives, everything will be perfect."

Two years later

Lisa squinted her eyes to get used to the darkness of the room and held her breath with his senses on the lookout. She suddenly got up from the old mattress on which she had dozed off and clawed her fingers around the revolver she had in her pocket, ready to take it out.
"Stop!" She yelled when the male silhouette moved some steps towards her in the dim light. "I have a handgun!"
The man halted. He was tall and slender, with thin lips . A moonbeam pouring from the window lighted his pointy chin and cheekbones. His shoulder- length raven hair was loose and dishevelled. He slowly lifted up both his hands showing his palms
"I have no bad intentions". He said cautiously.
She held the gun on him. Her hands slightly shaking "Who are you? Go away. You won't find anything here."
"My name is Loki"- he answered- "I'm unarmed. I won't do you any harm." His voice was deep and mellow. Lisa stepped back and keeping the gun always on Loki, switched on the lamp close to the mattress. The room was instantly filled with a pale yellow light. As Loki saw her, his heart almost leaped out of his chest. She was still as beautiful as he remembered though time had left slight marks on her . Her hips were thinner and her expression had hardened. He gave her a faint smile but she did not smile back. In spite of being late night she was fully dressed and a large filled rucksack lied on the floor, next to the room door.
A smell of lavender and thyme hit Loki' s nostrils and made him wince. That was her perfume, it was still the same. In a moment he was overwhelmed by memories and a deep shiver rushed through him like a frozen finger along his bare skin. He swallowed hard and swayed for a second.
"Are you all right?" Lisa asked gingerly.
Loki got hold of himself and nodded. She was staring at him with her eyes narrowed. "Loki you said? Thor's brother?"
"In person." He confirmed with a grin of gloat. A grimace of deep disgust mixed with anger twitched Lisa' s face. "The mad man who stroke New York out in 2012 with an army of huge alien lizards?"
The gloat disappeared immediately. "Apparently." He admitted pretty embarrassed. Lisa raised her eyebrow and shook her head. "My compliments", she said with sarcasm, "you managed to slay one of the largest and more populated cities of the USA, in less than a hour. She announced bitterly. "And for what?" She paused for a couple of seconds, pretending to gather her thoughts.
" Oh, yes! Because you wanted a throne." She went on, widening her eyes. Loki lifted his chin, his face clouded. His lips parted to reply but Lisa was faster. "You don' t know me but I know much about you, god of mischief. " She stated.
Loki ' s eyes rolled. His annoyance was quite clear.
"Oh pray tell", he hissed "I' m eager to know."
"I've been studying Norse gods for years, I know how you usually act to get to your purposes, plus, Jane Foster is ..." she hesitated and blinked a tear away "was" - she corrected herself, " one of my closest friends. I was with her during your brother's banishment. I remember what you did to prevent him from coming back to Asgard and rule it, I remember you sent the destroyer and almost killed him. It's easily understandable thus, that you don't stop at nothing to get what you want." She concluded.
"Wow" Loki said, clapping at her . "Excellent résumé , nevertheless, there is some inaccuracy I would like to underline."
"Firstly", he began "I completely killed him, not just almost and if Mjöllnir had not come back to his hand, he would probably be still there, lying in the dust.
Secondly, I just did what he asked me. He clearly begged me to take his life in exchange for your puny mortal friend's one.
And thirdly, what you vulgarly define as mischief is actually a fine, well-calibrated usage of magic arts, derived from a constant and long-lasting practice. Oh, by the way," he added coldly, "I never wanted a throne. I already had one, as a birthright, so I suggest you getting more precise information before you judge someone." He retorted.
what did you want , then? Lisa asked.
"I didn't mean to steal my brother's throne", he clarified. "I just wanted to prove I could be a worthy king as much as my brother is."
Lisa's stern voice had not softened at all.
"How exactly? She countered. "By striking terror and killing thousands of innocent people? Did you forget what you did seven years ago?"
Loki closed his eyes and sucked a deep breath in.
"Lisa listen I-"
"Lisa?" She abruptly cut in- "how the hell do you know my name?"
Oh shit. Loki realised the gross mistake he had done and glimpsed growing panic in her eyes
"Answer my question". She ordered.
"The cup". He said, faking spontaneity, while his guts were actually knotting - he beckoned at a black cup standing on the bedside table. Red stylised letters were carved on its ceramic surface. "Isn't that your name?"
"It is." Lisa confirmed but she had not intention to let down her guard.
"Why are you here? Who are you working for?" She insisted.
Loki frowned and tilted his head in surprise.
"Beg your pardon? I'm not working for anyone! Ok... I'll be honest with you," he began, "This is the first place that hit my mind before-"
"So you knew it." Lisa cut in again. "You already knew I was here." She stepped forward and stopped right in front of Loki. The extremity of the revolver touched his chest. "Your lies don' t work with me." She muttered, her eyes just fixed on his. "Tell me what you want from me."
Loki held her gaze and for an instant he was to confess her the truth. If only had she known! He swallowed and spoke.
"Midgard." He said in the end. "I meant that Midgard is the first place that hit my mind. If you had just let me complete the sentence." He added in a vexed tone. "Not this- he flickered his eyes all around - "crumbling ruin". He concluded sharply.
Lisa narrowed his eyes totally offended. She lowered the revolver and let it fall on the floor. Her eyes had turned watery again. "This crumbling ruin" , she explained in a shaken voice, "is what remains of my house. If prince Loki is not pleased with the furniture, she mocked at him, " the door is right there".
Loki did not answer. With careful eyes he gave another look around and finally realised where he was. Another wave of memories phagocytised him but this time, he used every inch of his will not to drown. Rhetoric had always been one of his best skills while now it seemed his abilities were gradually fading. He softly held her hand and tried to make amend, weighting every word.
"I am truly sorry for what I've just said." He started
"I have been indelicate and rude. I did not mean to evoke you sad memories." Lisa gazed at him for a short while, uncertain whether believe him or not. He looked sincere but he was the god of lies, after all...
"My fault", she finally whispered. "You couldn't know it was my house". She reckoned. " And you're right, it's just a shattered heap of ruins, but I can't leave it." She walked towards a wooden wobbly table and swiped a hand on a dusty silver frame. Behind the chipped glass, a little girl was smiling and hugging a huge teddy bear.
"My daughter" Lisa said.
Loki's jaws got suddenly clamped as well as his throat. "Where is she now?" He managed, almost chocking. "Thanos took her away from me. We were playing in the garden and the next moment, she was just.. gone." She replied sadly.

Loki' s breath snagged. He felt like someone was wrecking him from the inside, bone by bone. Guilt and failure gripped him mercilessly and for the first time in many years, he cried. Desperately.

Restraintlessly.

Utterly devasted.