A/N: This is my first One Tree Hill fanfic. I have always loved OTH and especially the friendship that Brooke and Peyton have. The idea for this fic has been running around for days in my head, but the words never seemed to form until today. I have never written in first person, but I like the form this story took from Brooke's POV. I hope you enjoy and I would love to hear whatever it is you would like to tell me about it.

A/N 2: The Italics are the flashback

A/N 3: Punctuation and I didn't really get along. The good thing is you don't need it for this type of story, it actually adds to the affect. The end of a line complete a thought, sometimes its the end of a sentence, sometimes not

It Will Always Be There

Moments define our life

Flashback

As I leave the gym, duffle bag and pom poms in hand, I notice I am not the only one still here at such an ungodly hour on a Tuesday night

I choose to ignore her, like I have been for the past 10 days, as I make my way towards the parking lot

"Brooke are we seriously going to keep doing this?" she calls after my retreating form

"Yeah Peyton we are," I shoot back not even turning to look at her as I make my way to my car

"So that's it, after everything?" It's a question, one asked with no sense of deflation or defeat

"You mean after years of thinking our friendship was something more than it actually was"

It doesn't surprise me how fast I feel my anger rise

"You know as well as I do, that no matter what it, our friendship, will always be there," she says soft but firmly

I look up from where I was searching in my bag for my keys to truly look at my ex-best friend for the first time since I left her standing, clutching her cheek from where my hand left its mark

She looks almost hopeful, as though this time will be different than the thousands of other times she has asked my forgiveness

A weighted sigh escapes me, as I shake my head

"No, Peyton it won't," I breathe out bowing my head in surrender to the idea I could forgive her this time

I hear her take in a breath, and look up again

The hope that had been there only seconds before is gone, replaced suddenly with harsh realization

It surprises me even a little

Its not as though we haven't had this conversation several times in the last few days, but for some reason this one is different

She realizes it and so do I

We stand there awkwardly for a moment, each unable to move from where our feet seem rooted through the pavement

The silence unnerves me a little

Our friendship was always based on the aspects of sound…

The constant music that normally surrounded the blonde in front of me

The way we could talk for hours veiled in the darkness of one of our bedrooms

Even the venomous words we shot back and forth as of late

The silence is oddly appropriate I decide

As if the world around us has taken notice of the end of it all

"Goodbye Brooke," her voice breaks through the barrier

The anger that had risen so quickly is now gone, as I gaze at the girl I had always considered a sister

I nod my head slightly as my hands finally clasp around the keys in the pocket of my bag

"Goodbye Peyton"

Although she has already turned away, she turns back to nod once

Finalizing it all somehow

I listen to her footsteps disappearing away

As I turn the key in the door, I hear it…

The small click in the once again noiseless night

My lungs rush to take in air

"Drop the bag and the keys on the ground" the voice growls

I do as I am told, my brain now registering what the click had been

"Turn around"

Hesitating for a second, I turn to stare directly down the barrel of the gun I knew would be there

The figure is clouded by the shadows, the hood of a dark sweatshirt hiding his face

"Please" I whisper unafraid to beg

His laughs sends chills down my spine as his other hand reaches to draws a caressing touch down the side of my face

His lips stroke against my ear as he whispers, "Begging won't save you"

I don't even notice the tears that slip silently down my face

He grabs my wrist in an effort to pull me closer to him

I fight against it, and before I know it I can feel the cool metal against the skin under my chin

"Don't make this harder than it has to be"

His face is close to mine, his features still looming behind the darkness, but his eyes dart out to meet mine

Their color reminds me of the sky just before lightning of the thunderstorm streaks across the deep grey clouds

My legs are moving before I can realize it

His body pulling mine deeper into the darkness of the deserted parking lot

"Take me"

His body jerks to a stop forcing mine to do this same

"Take me" the voice speaks stronger this time

I know that voice

He whips us both around, growling at the unwelcome intrusion

She steps closer, emerging from her own darkness

He doesn't move at first, the gun pressed firmly against my ribcage

She takes another step towards us

"Take me"

Although I can't see his face, I can tell he is contemplating her words

I take my moment, my eyes rising to meet emerald green

Words fly through my head….

Cries for help,

Angered statements of retribution

Pleading murmurs for this all to be a dream

But the words cannot seem to find the path to my lips, and I can only stare at the emerald eyes that can penetrate me down to the very depths of my soul

And in that moment I realize, she was right…

'It will always be there…'

She knows me in ways no other person can

And I her

The moment is broken as I feel his hand release its hold on my arm, and the pavement is rushing to meet me

My wrist cracks as I try desperately to keep from crashing into the unforgiving surface face first

I don't even have a chance to cry out in pain, before I feel an arm around my waist lifting me from where I am hunched

My instincts tell me to fight, fearing it is him

but something holds me back

The touch is familiar

She pulls me up, her body facing mine

Our eyes lock once again

I am searching for something in them

Fear

Even the slightest indication she has a plan maybe

But instead I find something I thought I had extinguished moments before

Hope

A small smile plays across her lips

The smile I have seen a million times

Every single time taking it for granted

Before I know what is happening, she has crossed the short distance that separated us from him

He begins to pull her into the darkness that was meant for me

I can't move

Suddenly, her body jerks from his slightly, and she turns back to me

"It will always be there Brooke," her voice is calm, and that same small smile reappears for the last time as she disappears completely into the night

I am left to the silence

The days surrounding that night remain a blur in my mind

Hours of questioning

Constant whispers as I pass,

The never ending looks of pity

They do little to phase me

Even the words of those closest to me….

Closest to her

Cannot penetrate the fog that consumes

It is true that the moments in our life define who we are

They have defined mine

There are moments when I see her

Sometimes she is the young surly, blonde I remember from my youth

Others she is the tortured artist lost deep within her drawings

But mostly, she is the beautiful person I once deemed myself worthy enough to call my best friend

No matter how I see her though, I find that small smile once again playing across her lips just before she disappears

At one time or another, they have all said it was time to let her go

To forgive myself

The don't understand

How can they

They know nothing of how it feels for one single moment to define your entire life…

Time seemingly allowed their pain to fade

While only amplifying mine more with each passing day

They gave up long ago

Begging me to join them in their resolve she wasn't coming back

Their weary nods, the only reply when I told them I would never stop searching

Searching for her

For what would always be there

That searching has led me here…

Knock, knock

"Hello, can I help you," the women on the old side of the door asks almost happily

Her smiles falters slightly at my appearance

I can't blame her, I am not the Brooke Davis, I once knew

"Excuse me miss, was there something you needed," she asks when the silence becomes too much

My conscious fights the ever raging battle no to shatter into the million pieces it truly is finds itself in

"Yes, I'm looking for my friend," I say softly, having said it many times before

"She's been missing a long time," the women states absentmindedly staring at the flyer I extend to her

7 years

4 months

2 days

12 hours

17 minutes

33 seconds

I want to say, but don't…

"Yes, Ma'am, I know"

She seems to be taking it all in

"Tree Hill's quite a ways from here," she says

It's what everyone had said, and it was true, but I had searched every where else

"Yes, I know," I reply

She gives me that look, the one that says, "You are crazy for believing you will find her"

Everyone had given it to me

"I'm sorry I haven't seen her," she states softly

All I can do is nod my head

It wasn't that I wasn't hoping for a miracle

I had just come not to expect one

Accepting long ago that one day I would be worthy of my miracle

"Thank you," I whisper turning to leave

"Do you really think you will find her?" the women's voice doesn't betray any feelings of disbelief that I am actually still looking

No, it's simply a question of if I believe my friend is really out there somewhere

My head falls to look at the cobblestones of her walkway

When I look up again, the look in her eyes shows her understanding

"I have to," I say

She nods

I turn again to leave, but she calls out once more

"For what it's worth, she is lucky to have a friend like you"

A tear makes its way down my cheek

I don't turn back to face her

"No Ma'am, I am the lucky one"

Walking slowly down the sidewalk, I reach into my bag and pull out another flyer

Emerald eyes once again take hold of mine,

Her ever-present smile eliciting one from my own lips

Taking the stairs that lead to another door, I can hear her voice as clearly as if it was that night again…

"It will always be there"

My smile grows as I run a finger down her picture and whisper

"Always"