Songs of Christmas CH. 1: Nuttin' For Christmas

Hi, everybody! Spadefire here with an in-season batch of songfics! We'll start off with Emma, just to get the ball rolling (since she's so annoyingly musical) and afterwards see where it takes us. Bits and Pieces is gonna be on hold until, oh, say, after New Year's to make room for this. I own the good Miss O'Reiley and nothin' else, and the song is the Relient K version. I highly suggest you listen to it while reading; it enriches the experience. ;) Enjoy!

"BUT KIMIKOOOO, YOU HAVETA HELP MEEEE!" Emma cried. She was currently attached to Kimiko's leg and would not let go, even though Kimiko was dragging her down several flights of the Temple's stairs. Which were made of marble. Kimiko wasn't sure if she should be worried that Emma seemed not to notice or annoyed that Emma had yet to let go, but she was currently leaning towards the former.

"No! Just because you've been bad all year does not mean you won't get any presents," Kimiko said, trying in vain to shake the Irish girl off. "And besides, how am I supposed to help you?"

"Write a letter to the big guy! You've been (well, mostly) good all year, so you can vouch for me!" Emma said, giving Kimiko puppy eyes. "C'mon, ya gotta help me! I'm in enough trouble as it is, but I refuse to be on the naughty list this year!"

"We don't even celebrate Christmas up here. We do Chinese New Year, so you don't have to worry about not getting presents," Kimiko pointed out.

"Naw, I'm makin' Christmas happen if it kills me. Or Raimundo. Whichever. But even if I couldn't, the naughtylist, Kim! Santa's permanent record of wrongdoers and pranksters! Every year I manage to skate by via doing a few good deeds at the end of the year to balance out my bad ones, but this year I've been slacking on my goodness count. My karma's finally caught up to me, Kimiko! I refuse to land on the naughty list for even one year. You have to help me."

Kimiko rolled her eyes. She had tried to explain to Emma that Santa didn't exist, but it had been a no go. Emma simply had a good reason why the "man in red" existed for every reason Kimiko had to disprove his existence, to the point where she nearly had Kimiko believing. However, Kimiko Tohomiko did not believe in such childish things as Santa Claus and, in the end, would have none of it. It was too bad Emma was the same way, but with opposite convictions.

"And what, exactly, does your list of transgressions consist of?" Kimiko monotoned, hoping that the big words would deter Emma. But yet again, it was a no go, and Emma simply grinned. "I was hoping you'd say that!" she said, leaping to her feet, and Kimiko heard music start. 'Oh no…'

"ONE, TWO, THREE, FOUR!" Emma yelled as the normal lights dimmed and random, colored lights began to strobe. 'What have I done?' Kimiko thought despairingly, but it was simply too late. Now she could only sit back and watch the madness unfold.

"I broke my bat on Omi's head! Somebody snitched on me! I hid a frog in Kimi's bed! Somebody snitched on me! I spilled milk on Rai's new rug, I made Dojo eat a bug, bought some gum with a penny slug an' somebody snitched on me!

"Oh, I'm gettin' nuttin' for Christmas! Old Master Fung is real mad! I'm getting' nuttin' for Christmas! 'Cause I ain't been nuttin' but bad!

"I won't be seein' Santa Claus! (Somebody snitched on me.) he won't come visit me because somebody snitched on me! Next year I'll be goin' straight, next year I'll be good, just wait, I'd start now but it's too late 'cause somebody snitched on me!

"Oh, I'm gettin' nuttin' for Christmas! Old Master Fung is real mad! I'm getting' nuttin' for Christmas! 'Cause I ain't been nuttin' but bad! Wherever you go, whatever you do, 'cause if you don't, I'm warnin' you! (I'm gettin' nuttin' for Christmas. Nuts!)

"Oh, I'm gettin' nuttin' for Christmas! (Hey! Hey!) Old Master Fung is real mad! (He's so mad!) I'm getting' nuttin' for Christmas! (Hey! Hey!) 'Cause I ain't been nuttin' but bad! Yes, I ain't been nuttin' but bad!"

"Uh…" Kimiko was, for lack of a better word, stupefied. "That was… informative."

"Wasn't it, though?' Emma asked cheerfully. "So, anyway, that's just some of the stuff I've done since I got here."

"Huh. Well, I hardly think- wait a minute, you were the one who put that frog in my bed?" she cried, hands curling into fists.

"Eheh, did I say Kimi's bed? I meant, uh… over there! Raimundo's not wearing a shirt!" Emma yelled, pointing over Kimiko's shoulder.

"Like I'd fall for that!" Kimiko snarled, lunging at the Irish girl. Emma screamed and took off down the halls of the temple, Kimiko hot on her heels. Raimundo peered around the corner, shivering. "Man, I wish the girls would hurry up with the laundry," he muttered, rubbing his bare arms. "I'm freezing!"