Always

Author: Laura Isaac

E-mail: laura_isaac@hotmail.com

Rating: PG

Distribution: Anyone who wants it, but please tell me where you put it so my ego can be massaged!

Disclaimer: I own none of these character, they belong to Joss (god), 20th Century Fox and Mutant Enemy "grr arrgghh!!"

Summary: Someone writes a letter to Tara, but its not who you might think!

Dearest Tara,

I write this as I sit at my desk, surrounded by screwed up balls of paper where I had started to try and put on paper how much you mean to me. I walk round the U.C.Sunnydale Campus day after day trying to get a glimpse of you, your golden blonde hair, the bluest eyes I have ever seen in my life and a smile that lights up my darkness nights. I have kept my feelings under wraps for so long now and it is driving me mad, your very essence is driving me mad. I know that you do not feel the same, that you love Willow and you always will. You love her more than anything in this world or any world beyond. You wouldn't talk to anyone after you left the house and moved away from Willow, from everyone. I wanted more than anytihng to go with you, to comfort you, to console you, to make you see that there was someone who wanted you more than Willow wanted you, more than you wanted Willow. I know that I will never be Willow, I love her more than anything in this world too, I know that I will never compare to her in any way, but I would love it, just for once for you to say that I did, that you loved me more and wanted to be with me. I know that will never happen.

I mope for days, knowing that you'll never be mine, I'll never be the one that sleeps with you at night or wakes up with you, safely nestled in your arms in the mornings. You are civil to me as you are with the other Scoobies, you look with longing at Will no matter where she is in the room or what shes doing, i always see that and it drives me mad, but it is I that looks in longing over at you. I hope no-one has ever seen this because they would kill me, accuse me of trying to get between you and Willow and wreak it for both of you, truth is I don't want that, I just want the chance for once.

Tara, I love you, I don't know what you will make of this, but it just had to be said!

Yours always,

Xander

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