TOW the second Chandler

TOW the second Chandler

This takes place somewhere in season two or three or whatever, but Chandler and Monica are not together, Ross and Rachel are though. I hope the fic explains itself. The characters are not mine. Please read and review!

( Chandler and Joey´s, it´s night, and Chandler walks into the kitchen)

CHANDLER: (halfsleeping) God, I´m so thirsy. (grabs something which stand on the counter)

Is this juice? (smells it) I think it´s already gotten bad. Oh, I feel so... (he passes out)

(Morning, Chandler wakes up...)

CHANDLER: (looks around) Where the hell am I? (gets up and walks out of the room) Wow! What happened to the apartment! Joey! Joe! ( A woman enters.)

WOMAN: Great, you´re awake. The people for the new comics are here.

CHANDLER: What comics? And what happened to my apartment, and my roommate, who are you?

WOMAN: That´s funny Mr. Bing, it´s me Sandy, your secretary. (she leaves)

CHANDLER: It wasn´t supposed to be funny! ( two tall men enter)

MAN1: Morning, Mr. Bing. Did we wake you?

MAN2: We have to discuss the next Fidel Comic.

CHANDLER: What?

MAN2: Your next comic. You know, the one where Fidel falls in love.

CHANDLER: I´m writing comics?

MAN1: You´re writing very good comics. Otherwise you sure couldn´t pay for this apartment.

CHANDLER: But I am a data processor.

MAN2: Not you! You´rre really funny! You made Fidel once a data processor. (he giggles a bit, and Chandler lookes at him confused)

MAN1: I think you´re not awake enough for that now, we´ll leave all the stuff here. Just call us when you´re done, and we´ll discuss the rest. (they leave)

CHANDLER: What the hell happened!? (goes back to his bedroom, looks around) Here are no pictures of my friends! Or Yasmine Bleeth! And joey´s room... (runs out and enters the next room. In it are pictures of a weird looking comic figur, a huge desk with all the drawing stuff, and some other little things) Oh my god! I must be dreaming! ( he pinches himself very hard) AH! Ok, it hurt but what is this? ( a bell rings, Chandler leaves the room to check what it is, it´s the phone, he piks it up) Hello?

SANDY: Mr. Bing, Mrs. Tribbiani is here. Can she come in?

CHANDLER: (shocked) Who!?

SANDY: Mrs. Tribbiani. Can she come in or not?

CHANDLER: Of course, send her in. (hangs up the phone, a woman enters)

CHANDLER: (even more shocked) Monica!?

MONICA: (cold) For you still Mrs. Tribbiani.

CHANDLER: You´re married with Joey?!

MONICA: That´s right, I am married with Joseph Tribbiani, the actor. Though I really don´t know how´s that your business. I´m here to talk about your divorce.

CHANDLER: What?!

MONICA: Your divorce! I´m your ex-wife´s lawyer, I wish I wasn´t though. (gives him an angry glare)

CHANDLER: (pretending to understand) Yeah, sure. Ok, where is...

MONICA: You´ve already forgotten her name?! Rachel.

CHANDLER: Oh my god, I was married with Rachel Green!?

MONICA: Yeah, she feels the same way. So can we get on now. She wants the house in L.A., the Porsche, the two apartments here in New York, and of course Chucky.

CHANDLER: Chucky... sure...

MONICA: Now, you not even remember your cat Chucky. That must have been a great night for ya.

CHANDLER: Of course I remember my cat Chucky! She can have all she wants, I don´t care. (Monica looks shocked at him)

MONICA: She can have what she wants?

CHANDLER: Yeah... but only if you answer me a few questions.

MONICA: (a bit unsure) Ok...

CHANDLER: You have a brother named Ross, right?

MONICA: Yeah, you two went to college together. (Chandler smiles)

CHANDLER: So we´ve been friends?

MONICA: Yeah sure! Like people like me and my brother be friends with you!

CHANDLER: Ok, Was Joe.. I mean your husband every my friend?

MONICA: No! But he loves your comics... he never saw you in person though. Was that enough now? I´m your lawyer and not the other way around.

CHANDLER: By the way, how comes that you are a lawyer and not a chef?

MONICA: Stop that now. I never wanted to become a chef, I always wanted to be a lawyer. And now Goodbye, we´ll see tomorrow with RACHEL. Don´t forget her name. (she leaves)

CHANDLER: Ok, this really isn´t funny anymore. I gotta do something... Central Perk! I gotta go to Central Perk! (he leaves, then comes back in) I have to get dressed first.

(Central Perk, Ross and Phoebe are there)

ROSS: I wonder where Monica is.

PHOEBE: She´s at Mr.Bing.

ROSS: I wonder why she took this case. I mean her client is Rachel Green, her old best friend from Highschool.

PHOEBE: I thought Monica was happy that Rachel called.

ROSS: At first, but then she found out that Rachel didn´t call because of Monica but because she needed a cheap lawyer.

PHOEBE: That´s really mean.

ROSS: But she wasn´t always like this. I guess she became so when she married Chandler.

PHOEBE: Isn´t this weird for you? Your little sister takes the case of a girl you knew because she gets divorced to your old college roomamte.

ROSS: Yeah... (Chandler runs in)

CHANDLER: Ross, Pheebs!

PHOEBE: Mr.Bing! What the hell are you doing here?

CHANDLER: I was searching you guys, you are my friends.

PHOEBE: I don´t think so...

ROSS: Me either. We´ve been friends in college til you got your job and dumped me. Thanks again for destroying my life. (he goes to the bathroom)

CHANDLER: (desperate) I don´t understand this. I mean yesterday everything was just normal and now...

PHOEBE: Marriage can end fast.

CHANDLER: That´s not what I mean. Yesterday you were all my friends, you, Ross, Monica, Rachel and Joey. Nothing was like this.

PHOEBE: I think it´s true what they say about you, you have an alcohol problem.

CHANDLER: Wasn´t you always the one who belived in supernatural things? I think it´s something like that.

PHOEBE: Are you aware of the fact that we don´t know each other?

CHANDLER: (sad) Yeah... Tell Ross I`m sorry for whatever I have done. (he leaves)

( Outside)

CHANDLER: (thinking) What have I done? I don´t know what to do. Maybe I could check if Joey and Monica still live in the old apartment.

(In the building)

CHANDLER: (thinking, smiling) Just what I thought; they live in Mon´s apartment. I wonder how they got together. Maybe I should find out. I have nothing to do and since I am stuck here... But how could I find out...

MONICA: What are you doing here!?

CHANDLER: (turns around) Mo- Mrs. Tribbiani! Hello! I am here because...

MONICA: I don´t want to know as long as you leave right now. (she goes upstaires, Chandler follows her)

CHANDLER: Why do you hate me so much?

MONICA: You should know and now leave me alone, or I´ll call the police.

CHANDLER: (more to himself) This is just a joke, this just can´t be real. (Monica turns around)

MONICA: You wonder why I hate you? Or why your wife wanted the divorce? At first you destroyed my brother´s life cause you stole his money and he couldn´t afford his studies anymore, and he was too proud to aks our parents for money and your wife left you because you cheated and never had time for the relationship. Maybe you understand now why people don´t like you.

(continues walking, Chandler still follows her)

CHANDLER: (shocked) I did that to Ross?

MONICA: (about to unlock the door) Yeah, and so you could afford your studies.

CHANDLER: I´m sorry...

MONICA: That doesn´t help my brother. He´s a waiter now, just because of you.

CHANDLER: I could get him a better job.

MONICA: He doesn´t need help, especially not from you. He is the last one he wants to see, and me too. (slams the door)

CHANDLER: My last chance is Joey... I wonder if he can be my friend. I have to find him.

(sits down in the hallway) He has to come home some time, and I´ll be there when he does.

(Three houres later, Chandler is asleep on the ground)

MAN: Are you all right?

CHANDLER: (wakes up) Yeah, I am just waiting- Joey!

JOEY: Aren´t you Mr.Bing, of the Fidel comics?

CHANDLER: Yes, I think so. (Joey helps him up)

JOEY: I always wanted to meet you. Your comics are great, but there is another thing... (he punched Chandler in the face)

JOEY: That´s for destroying my best friend´s life. (walks into the apartment)

CHANDLER: ( hurt) I guess I lost my friends. (he leaves the building)

( Back in Chandler´s apartment)

SANDY: Good evening, Mr.Bing. What have you done with your face? I thought I wouldn´t see you tonight anymore.

CHANDLER: I ran into a door.I am tired, tomorrow is gonna be a hard day.

SANDY: (confused) Tomorrow is Sunday and your free day.

CHANDLER: You can leave now. See you tomorrow.

SANDY: But I have another two hourse left.

CHANDLER: You can go home, I don´t need you anymore today.

SANDY: If you say so... (she leaves) (Chandler enters his bedroom)

CHANDLER: I always thought I would be happy if I had a better job, but apparently it isn´t. I should sleep, maybe tomorrow everything is like it was.

( Next morning, someone is knocking on the door)

CHANDLER: (wakes up) Am I back? (looks around, disappointed) No... (gets up and opens the door)

SANDY: Finally! (looks at him) Did you sleep in your clothes? Your wife is here.

CHANDLER: Then let her in.

SANDY: (looks a bit shocked) Fine. (lets Rachel in and leaves the room)

RACHEL: (cold) Morning. Oh, I see someone finally found the strenght to punch you.Anyway, I heard you already spoke with my lawyer.

CHANDLER:Yeah, I already told Mon- I mean Mrs.Tribbiani that you can have what you want.

RACHEL: I know that is the reason why I am here. I don´t belive you.

CHANDLER: I am serious, Rachel. Take whatever you want.

RACHEL: Wow, you must have drank a lot lately.

CHANDLER: Why does everybody say that? It´s just... it´s my fault that we´re getting divorced so just take what you want.

RACHEL: What if I wanted all your houses, and cars?

CHANDLER: As long as I live somewhere and have at least one car, I don´t care.

RACHEL: Are you really my husband?

CHANDLER: Apparently...

RACHEL: Then ok, I´m gonna see you in the courtroom in a week. (she leaves)

CHANDLER: (to himself) Everybody thinks I´m a pig. What wonderful life... I need to talk with Monica again. (leaves)

( Central Perk, everybody is there, which is Monica, Joey, Ross and Phoebe)

ROSS: (happy) And you really punched him?

JOEY: Yes, Ross, how often do I have to tell you that?

PHOEBE: This Mr.Bing is really weird. He said some things about us being friends with him.

MONICA: (thinking) I gotta say, he was a lot different than the all the times before.

ROSS: I guess he just pretended to be nice.

JOEY: He is a pig, but his comics are funny. (Chandler enters)

ROSS: (angry) Why don´t you leave us alone?

CHANDLER: Guys, I...

JOEY: Do you want me to punch you again?

CHANDLER: I don´t know how to explain.

ROSS: You don´t have to, just leave.

CHANDLER: But I wanna talk with you guys.

JOEY: Let´s leave. (they all leave except for Chandler, he stops Monica)

CHANDLER: Would you please just listen to me?

MONICA: No, and now let me go.

CHANDLER: You can´t hate me.

MONICA: But I do. You´re right, there was a time I didn´t hate you. It was the day I visited Ross in college [in this fic Chandler never was there at Thangsgiving]. You´ve been really nice that day, and I felt very attracted to you but when I found out what you did to Ross... Now I only feel hate and that´ll never change. (she breaks off Chandler´s grip and leaves, Chandler almost cries)

(Evening, Chandler is home)

SANDY: (worried) Mr.Bing, are you ok?

CHANDLER: Do I have any friends?

SANDY: Yes...

CHANDLER: Really, tell me one.

SANDY: (thinking) Ok, I can´t think of one. But you have money, if you wanted you could buy you friends. I´m going home now, see you tomorrow. (she leaves)

CHANDLER: (to himself) I don´t want to buy me friends, I want my old friends back.

( In the night, Chandler walks into the kitchen, he´s half asleep)

CHANDLER: Water, I need water. (grabs a bottle and drinks) Oh, god, not again... (he passes out)

JOEY: (worried) Chandler? Please wake up!

MONICA: Shouldn´t we call a doctor?

ROSS: I think Monica is right.

PHOEBE: Maybe he´s dead. (Everybody looks at her angry) I said maybe.

RACHEL: What the hell did he take?

JOEY: I don´t know. I just heard a loud noise and cam out and saw Chandler laying here.

( Chandler slowly opens his eyes)

JOEY: He´s back!

CHANDLER: (weak) Joey?

JOEY: Yes, it´s me!

CHANDLER: You are all here... I thought you hated me.

PHOEBE: Just sometimes. (Ross and Joey help him up)

CHANDLER: You really don´t hate me? ( they all nod no) And I was never married to Rachel?

ROSS: Yeah sure!

CHANDLER: And I am a data processor, right?

RACHEL: I don´t know, but something with numbers.

CHANDLER: But the most important thing; Ross you are a panthologist? (he nods) And you two (points to Joey and Monica) are not married? ( again, they nod no) (happy) I´m back.

JOEY: (confused) Why, you´ve been here all the time. Just passed out.

CHANDLER: How loong was I passed out?

JOEY: About five minutes.

CHANDLER: Well, it seemed longer.

RACHEL: (yawns) Since you´re "back" now, I´ll go back to sleep. Ross, come on. (they leave, together with Phoebe)

JOEY: I´ll go back to sleep too. And if you should feel thirsty or hungry, switch on the light before. How could you be so stupid? ( goes in his bedroom)

MONICA: I was reallly worried about you.

CHANDLER: Yeah me too... did you ever wanted to become a lawyer?

MONICA: Actually, yes, but at then at the Thanksgiving you told me to become a chef and so I did.

CHANDLER: You became a chef because of me?

MONICA: (shy) Yes...

CHANDLER: (smiles) That´s great. And thanks you don´t hate me anymore.

MONICA: (is confused) Sure... (kissed her on the cheek, she blushes a bit)

CHANDLER: Good night, Mon.

MONICA: Good night. (she leaves)

CHANDLER: (to himself) And I found you attractiv too, not just at the second Thanksgiving. (leaves for his bedroom)

Finally, done! Please review, even if I know this wasn´t good, I had fun writing it though.

Written by Anika mondler@gmx.net