You'll be in my heart
Lisbeth Salander leaned against the door frame, her arms folded over her chest, watching her daughter Liv, who was sleeping in the bed by the window. Now and then the little girl turned around in her sleep, sometimes mumbling things Lisbeth couldn't understand.
It was all part of the ritual, their ritual.
Lisbeth would bring Liv to bed and lie down next to her, hold her close and sing lullabies to her. When Liv drifted off to sleep finally, Lisbeth would lie with her a few minutes than get up and observe her from the door frame for an unknown period of time.
Looking at her daughter, sleeping peacefully in her bed, cuddled around the big polar bear she got from Mikael, gave something to Lisbeth Salander and also brought something up inside of her she never thought she had. She felt love and tenderness for her daughter and at the same time she experienced unknown amounts of happiness and peace. But none of this emotions came close to the feeling she had when she gave birth to Liv, looking into her little red face with the dark hair and the closed eyes, recognizing that this little life she just brought into this world was her daughter and that she needed her to protect her, to guide her and to love her unconditionally.
After a few more minutes had passed, Lisbeth looked at her watch. It was nearly half past ten.
With all strength she had, she tore her look from her daughter and went back to the living room that was nearly in full darkness. Only the lights from outside shining through the window lit up the room a little bit. Lisbeth sat down in her favorite blue armchair which stood directly in front of the panorama glass façade, took up her Powerbook from the occasional table and placed it on her lap. Since the birth of Liv Lisbeth got used to work at night.
In the first months after the birth of her daughter it was nearly impossible for Salander to work without any interruption, even when she worked at night. During the whole day Liv needed someone who took care of her, played with her and paid attention to her.
Of course Mikael helped her. How could he not? He always helped her whenever she needed him, no matter if she wanted his help or not. That's the way he was.
The only times when Lisbeth could work on the cases Armansky gave her for researching was when Liv was asleep. Like all little children she had a very unregularly sleeping pattern.
Even if Lisbeth never complained she was relieved when Liv started sleeping through the whole night. Finally she had time to do her work.
It was not like she needed to work. Lisbeth and her daughter could have lived easily from the money she took from Wennerström years ago. But Lisbeth Salander was not the kind of person that just sits lazily on her butt. Besides she didn't consider her work as work. For her it was more like a hobby.
The case Armansy gave her was no big deal, just an employer who wanted to know if his employees were all clean. Salander worked fast and properly, her fingers seemed to fly over the keyboard, not even touching the typing buttons.
"Mummy?"
Lisbeth's fingers stopped immediately. She turned her head to the right side.
Liv stood next to her, the big polar bear pressed up against her body, looking shyly at her mother.
Lisbeth put the Powerbook down on the table and lifted Liv into her lap where the little girl made it herself comfortable.
Lisbeth wrapped her arms around her daughter and hold her tight against her chest.
"Can't sleep?" she asked quietly.
Liv nodded and cuddled up closer to her mother. "I miss daddy."
The girl with the dragon tattoo smiled in a mixture of amusement and love. Liv called Mikael 'daddy' since she could speak. And to be quite honest he was Livs Dad. He played with her, fed her, took care of her and had been there for her since day one.
"When will daddy come back?" asked the little girl.
"Tomorrow." answered Lisbeth.
Liv looked up into her face. "You promise?"
Lisbeth nodded. "I promise."
They sat together in the blue arm chair, watching out panorama glass façade, watching the lights of the town and listening to its muted noises.
"Mummy?"
"Yes, my love?"
"You sing for me?"
A loving smile appeared on Lisbeth Salanders face. She knew her daughter loved it, when she sang to her, although Lisbeth didn't consider herself being a good singer. She caressed Livs hair and kissed her on the head.
And she started to sing.
Come stop your crying For one so small 'Cause you'll be in my heart Why can't they understand And you'll be in my heart Don't listen to them And destiny calls you 'Cause you'll be in my heart Oooo, you'll be in my heart Always
It will be alright
Just take my hand
Hold it tight
I will protect you
From all around you
I will be here
Don't you cry
You seem so strong
My arms will hold you
Keep you safe and warm
This bond between us
Can't be broken
I will be here don't you cry
Yes, you'll be in my heart
From this day on
Now and forever more
You'll be in my heart
No matter what they say
You'll be here in my heart
Always
the way we feel
They just don't trust
What they can't explain
I know we're different
But deep inside us
We're not that different at all
Yes, you'll be in my heart
From this day on
Now and forever more
You'll be in my heart
No matter what they say
You'll be here in my heart
Always
Cause what do they know?
We need each other
To have, to hold
They'll see in time
I know
You must be strong
I may not be with you
But you've got to hold on
They'll see in time
I know
We'll show them together
Believe me, you'll be in my heart
I'll be there from this day on
Now and forever more
You'll be here in my heart
No matter what they say
I'll be with you
You'll be here in my heart
I'll be there always
I'll be with you
I'll be there for you always
Always and always
Just look over your shoulder
Just look over your shoulder
Just look over your shoulder
I'll be there always
(Phil Collins "You'll be in my heart")
Lisbeth looked down at her daughter. The little girl slept peacefully in her mother's lap, holding the polar bear tight against her chest.
With tears in her eyes and a loving smile on her face Lisbeth kissed her daughter on the head and whispered "I love you."
Paying attention not to wake her daughter up Lisbeth Salander carefully stood up from the armchair, carrying her daughter back to her sleeping room. She was about to put her down in her bed when Lisbeth hesitated. She thought for a moment than changed her mind and went to hers and Mikael's sleeping room.
It wouldn't hurt anybody if she let Liv sleep in parent's bed tonight, although Lisbeth tried to push her softly into sleeping in her own room.
Carefully Lisbeth laid her daughter onto the mattress and covered her up with the blanket. She gave her one last good-night kiss and went to the bathroom to brush her teeth and to get ready for bed.
When she rinsed out her mouth from the toothpaste her look fell on the small package on the counter. After a short moment of hesitation she reached out and took the pregnancy test.
She knew about it since Mikael's departure. And in the first moment she was shocked. After Liv's birth she never thought about becoming a mother again. Liv was an unintentional – but very beautiful – happening. The same as this child growing inside her was.
Lisbeth turned the little package in her hands. Would Mikael be happy? She hoped so. They never talked about children, so she didn't know Mikael's opinion about this topic.
Forcing her thoughts to end she ripped the package into many small pieces and threw them in the dustbin. Then she took off her black shirt, pants and underwear. She was used to sleep naked and Liv didn't mind it.
When Lisbeth went under the blanket her daughter instinctively moved closer to her until her back made contact with Lisbeth's front side. Lovingly she put an arm around Liv and the polar bear and drifted off to sleep.
