p style="text-align: center;"strong/strongspan style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: medium;"Subject: STORY: Sonic Fights Robotnik From: sonfan (SONIC FAN) Date: Wed, Jun 24, 1998 20:51 EDT Message-id: 69b9f164d849989681 .ca style="font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size: medium;"ATTENTION: This be a phat rap so no shitty coments please! Authorz notes.. Lord of PEZ be awsome! Vote NO on Ken Penders! End of Authorz notes. Now onto tha stroy! SONIC FIGHTS ROBOTNIK By SONICFAN Sonics dopest adventure yet! Dat shiznit was a funky-ass brite middizzle mornin up in KnotHole Forrest. Da animals was fuckin wit thangs like they probably do. Rotor was cleanin up the sprokets Bunny was repaintin tha huts n' Tails wasx fightin stuffed bots with kung-fu. Sonic was up in his hut drankin a Mountian Due n' watchin TV. Furry Beavis and Butthead was on. I aint talkin' bout chicken n' gravy biatch. "It aint nuthin but like beavis n' butthead but beavis be a rat and butthead be a thugged-out dog" Sonic say ta tha reader. Antoinee was up in his fuckin lil' doggy den jammin ta Greenday. It make me wanna hollar playa! Just up of nowhere rotor jumps into tha room! Sonic looked round his hut. "Sonic! " holla'drotor. Shiiit, dis aint no joke. "Look out a SWAT-missel is goin ta hit you, nahmean biiiatch?" Sonic holla'd "WHA?" n' loooked up tha window fo' realz. A swat missel was goin ta hit him! Dude jumped outta tha hut n' ran round tha missel. Soon it smashed into a tree n' blew tha fuck into a mazillion peices. "Woah close one dude but I juiced it up ok" da perved-out muthafucka holla'd (sonic) ROtor holla'd "Bye" n' left. [[[[[[[[[[]]]]]]]]]]] Meanwhile up in Robotroptolis Grr said Robotnik. "I don't give a fuck bout it when missel misses!" da perved-out muthafucka holla'd, also "THis is yo' fault!" da perved-out muthafucka holla'd ta Snively. "no no sir!" he replied! "Packbell" "Yes yes y'all, sir?" "Bust a cap up in sonic cuz snively is too dumb ta be able too!" "Yes yes y'all, sir" "What a gangbangin' fat" holla'd snively, under his voice. [][][][][][][][][][][][][] 3 or four minutes lata back at knothole Sonic is chattin wit Sally on IRC I luv u sal ;) Awww ;) no ;p yo ass is buetiful aiiight we ave cybersex JUST THEN ROTOR BREAKS DOWN THE DOOR IN EMERGENCY! Rotor: Sonic look up we is under battle by 1000000 SWAT BOTS! Sonic: Ok i gots it covered Sonic runs ta tha bots "Yo dudes wassup?" Swat bots: DRRRROOOONE, WE KILL HEDGEHOG #1 PRIRORITY Sonic holla'd "Yo ass drone alot bots" Just then Sonic spinned round n' round cappin' half the bots. Da other half tried ta blast his ass but sonic pulled up a power rang and turned tha fuck into supa sonic easily cappin' tha rest wit no effort. "well" holla'd sonic "looks like 0 ta me hmmmm yo' countin is shitty Rote" Sonic goes back ta watchin TV Robotik appears on tha TV! "Wuz crackalackin' hoes call me Dr. Shiiit, dis aint no joke. Robotnik I have taken over tha TV station no one can stop me ha ha ha ha." "No way Fatnick! Letz git locked n loaded ta rock!" holla'd sonic Sonic was poppin' off ta Sally "We gotta stop Robotnuk!" Tails say "Can I go too Sally?" Sally holla'd "No yo ass is too lil robotnik n' his bots would bust a cap up in you or robotosize you" -WARNING if yo ass is offended you should not read this neck part- "FOCK YOU SALLY!" SCREMED tails -Ok lil playas you can look now :)- Sally kicked Tails "BAd Tails don't say that!" Tails holla'd "I be mad now I don't give a fuck bout you, nahmean biiiatch?" Sonic holla'd "oh no but we gotta stop Robotnickz TV plan! Letz go!" [[[[[[[[[[[[[]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]] Sonic was all up in tha Tv station fightin bots dat was jumpin off tha antenna. Tank-bot beat down towardz sonic. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. Sonic jumped flipped and spun up in tha air but tank bot was too fast. Just then sonic ran up tha wall and tank bot hit the wall. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. SOnic laughted all up in tha funninizz of all dis bullshit. Then he went tha fuck into tha tv station Robotnick was there bustin tha robotnik show "Dooo doo doo dis is tnhe robotnick show we is ghon be pack arfta tha lyrics doo doo doo BUY KEN PENDERS now back ta tha show doo do doo its tha robotnick show our hommie todizzle is "SONIC?" "Yes" holla'd Sonic Sonic fought snively first fo' realz. Armed wit a laser glock snively blasted at sonic but sonic beat his ass good. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! I be fly as a gangbangin' falcon, soarin all up in tha sky dawwwwg! Next was packbell yo. Dude blasted rockets at sonic but sonic jumped outta tha way n' kicked his ass down anyways. THen Robotnick hit the button. I aint talkin' bout chicken n' gravy biatch. Da lasers was aimed all up in tha blue blur. Shiiit, dis aint no joke. They would bust a cap up in his ass n' his friendz muthafucka! What will happen next! Stay tuned fo' PART 2! Just kiddin but sirousley titz time fro a cold-ass lil commerical brake. Wheel be right back (I hope) COmmercial Ken: Wuz crackalackin' dis is ken pendaz i don't give a fuck bout sonic cuz i draw his comics. I straight-up suck why dont i just bust a cap up in sally BANG her dope ass took a dirt nap now i'll do a cold-ass lil crossover of sonic and mR rogers ha ha ha ha ha i be evil. No back ta tha show, Sonic escaped a stickey situaton but there was mo' up in store fo' our hero. RObotnick produced a funky-ass bomb from his sleave. "Ha ha ha" said he. Sonic kicked robotnick knockin his ass up tha window. Da lardish doctor fell 5000 storyz ta his fuckin lil' dirtnap. But as Tails lata noted he was not straight-up dead as fuckin fried chicken. Sonic ran outta tha buildin just up in time. Da bombs fuse ended and... SNAP CRACKLE POP! THE BOMB EXPLODES! There goes our tv shows said sonc [[[[[[[[[[[[]]]]]]]]]]]]]] Sonic n' playaz had ta blow up tha robotik crystal mine. "Y'all." holla'd Bunny "these is soem weird crystals a shitload of em is blue n' some of em is red and a shitload of em is chronic n' a shitload of em is purple n' some of em is yellow. Some is squaree, otrhers is triangle. Heck all y'all a shitload of em arent even crystals at all!" Just then they all gasped up in horror. Shiiit, dis aint no joke. Da freshest bot up in the ghetto suddenly appeared wit its glocks aimed all up in tha freedom fighters. "Nooooo!" Antoinee quipped "Ze bot es BEEEEG!" SOnic n' Sally beat down tha bot. Da bot blew up takin the mine wit dat shit. [[[[[[[]]]]]] Robotnik was watchin dis on camera. "That hedgehog be a struttin contradiction" da perved-out muthafucka holla'd. Snively holla'd nothing, neither did packbell andthen They all rap "Walkin Contradiction" by Greenday [[[[[[[[[[5 muthafuckin years later]]]]]]]]]]]]]] Dat shiznit was tha last battle wit robotnick fo' realz. All of mobiuses freedom fightas had gathered at Kothole ta say shit bout tha plan. "Here is tha plan" holla'd Supa-Hoe Sally "We sneek tha fuck into Robotropolis n' sonic you fight tha bots while we blow up tha dirtnap egg" Sonic strutted thrugh tha woodz wit sally. "Umm sall what tha fuck bout dat cybersex" [[[[[disco music]]]]]] bow-bow-chicka-bow-wowp-chika-chika-bow-bow Tails: Funky dawwwwg! (dances) disco fever playa! (sees sonic n' sally) OoOopS! sorry Da troupe arrived at robotopobis. They stormed tha death egg. Dat shiznit was n' bangin battle but tha freedom fightas won in tha end. Back at Knothole celebration was up in order n' shit. They discussed how tha fuck ta fix the TV station n' antoinne danced n' Chis Petrucii busted the cold lil' woo wop of tha Dirtnap Egg battle Sonic was on a mission dark to defeat tha evil doctor but his thugged-out lil' punk-ass beat him like da ruffneck did and no one was asunder thunderrr... SONIC! SUPER SONIC! he is tha pimp of our day SONIC! SUPER SONIC! letz all say hooray lats all say hooray Bookshizzle wept all up in tha heartstrung pluckin of tha guitar. Tails made up wit sally n' gave her a funky-ass blunt. Everythang was A-OK. Just then 50 mazillion missels, a mazillion swat bots n' the entre robo brigade were comin' at Knothole. RObotnick flossed up, holdin the off button. I aint talkin' bout chicken n' gravy biatch. Only he had tha juice ta stop tha attack. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. Sonic put on his cybersuit. Robotnik strutted into rotors invention hut sonic followed behind his muthafuckin ass. They was both up in the hut sonic beat down wit fistz of fury dawwwwg! POW! BANG! SHABOOM! BOOM! KABLAMO! [[[[[[]]]]]]]] [][][][][][][] "I hope you had tha time of yo' liiiiiiiiife" busted Greenday. THE END Hope you was horny bout mah rap dawwwwg! Sorry bout any spellin errors./p