Be a better man than your father...
He hadn't been, had he? Been a better man than Walter? Not when it counted. Not when the same exact fucking thing happened to him. He lost his child, and maybe his actions hadn't led to the destruction of universes but it had destroyed his universe. His marriage. His whole world.
They'd lost her. In the aftermath of the explosion, she'd vanished. Confusion, so much confusion and then, the horrible reality of going home to an empty house. Her empty room. Olivia broke down. Cried till she made herself sick and he couldn't stop it. Then there was Walter, asking so many questions he couldn't answer. And everyday, the news getting worse. They were here. All over the world, the Observers were here.
But Olivia was stronger. Always was, always will be, stronger than him. After the crying she was ready. "What do we do next?" She and Walter and Broyles, looking forward, moving forward. Fighting the good fight, but he wouldn't. He couldn't. She was out there. Etta was waiting for him, waiting for "Dad" to come find her and save her.
And so Olivia had left him. He hadn't given her a choice, really. He wasn't the man she'd married, loved, fought for and remembered again against all odds. That man was gone. Lost in the confusion at the park. Lost, like the words his mother tried to instill into his being, night after night.
All he had left was the fear that caught in his throat every time he drew a breath. Fear that he had failed. Fear that his perfect little soul was lost and scared and waiting. She was waiting for him, counting on him to find her.
And if that meant that he had to let everyone go, then so be it. And if it meant that he would not be the one to make up for the sins of the past. The sins of his father, then so be it. He will lose it all. Lose his soul in exchange for hers.
