I do not own Fullmetal Alchemist and am using the characters created by Hiromu Arakawa without her permission, purely to spread the love.
A little TWT set in an AU blend of the first anime and the manga. No actual plot or pairings. Some bad language and poor parenting skills.
A Little Help from My Friends - Part 1/3
**
The problem with friends, Roy Mustang thought to himself as he parked his car in front of the modest town house, is that they take up so much of your time. Take today, for example. Roy was of the opinion that once a man was old enough to be served in a bar, birthdays were nothing more than a morbid benchmark along a sadly finite lifespan.
Try telling Maes Hughes that. Lord knows Roy had, but ultimately it came down to this: he would be there at 6 and Hughes would put the pictures away. As a bonus, Gracia would bake a cake. Roy secretly hoped she left the rest of the cooking to Maes.
So here he was, knocking on his best friend's door, bottle of wine in hand, mourning the loss of a perfectly good Friday night and the company of a charmingly empty headed and easy redhead he'd met just this morning. Roy knew better than to bring a date over to the Hughes' if he ever planned on seeing the girl again. And not marrying her.
Meas flung the door wide and greeted Roy like it had been 8 years instead of 8 hours since he'd seen him last. Roy allowed himself to be hugged, draped on, and steered inside.
"The Birthday Boy has arrived!"
Gracia called a cheery greeting from the kitchen while Roy surreptitiously scouted for blind dates. Maes, who could see through Roy and always seemed to know what he was doing before he knew it himself, grinned at him. "Just family tonight."
Not reassured in the slightest, Roy handed the bottle of wine to Maes, who accepted it even while scolding that a person didn't bring gifts to his own birthday party. They both knew Roy considered Maes' taste in wine to be lamentable at best, and that the bottle was pure self-defense. "Just family means my date for the night is...?"
"Elysia, you lucky devil."
The sad thing was, Roy was relieved that it was, in fact, his 8 month old goddaughter and not one of Gracia's numerous and frighteningly single sisters who was his partner for the evening. Maes was so besotted with his wife that he could not imagine a more perfect mate for his best friend than a lady from the same stock; consequently Roy had endured many dinners treading the thin line between utterly polite (anything less and Maes would kill him) and showing any interest at all in seeing the girl again. It felt like Gracia had an endless train of virtuously named siblings, all as sweet and bland as sugar cookies.
"I'll try not to take it personally when my date goes to bed at 7 - alone." Roy wandered into the kitchen to give Gracia a chaste kiss on the cheek. She was busy feeding Elysia, who smiled at her favorite 'uncle' and bounced in her high chair until Roy moved over to give her a quick buss as well.
"Lady killer," Maes said, tucking the wine in the ice box to chill. Roy gave him a 'what can I do?' shrug and grin before dutifully admiring Elysia's new outfit, tooth, and ability to shriek like a parrot.
"Maes is going to grill steak, Roy, I hope you don't mind dinner being so simple."
Mind? Roy was delighted. The less of Gracia's cooking he had to eat, the better. "That cake looks like you spent enough time in the kitchen already, Gracia." She tittered while Roy admired; it was a fancy looking thing, topped with strawberries, a weakness of his. The woman could make desserts, that was a known fact. It was like the girls of the family each took a course and cooked only that. Roy felt sorry for whoever ended up marrying hors d'oeuvre girl. Or fruit and nuts.
Fortunately Maes derailed that train of thought before it became even more ridiculous by handing Roy a drink and dragging him out back to admire his new barbecue grill. "You should put in a patio at your place, I'll come over and help you."
Roy shook his head and sipped the drink. Perfect, Maes made the best martinis. "You know what East Command is like right now."
Of course he did, Maes knew everything. It was his job. He tipped his head so his glasses glinted in the evening light. "Ed had a run in back in Youswell, didn't he? You going to volunteer to go clean that up?" He sampled his own drink, considering, then nodded. "Take you out of the spotlight a while, so the old farts see your reports and accomplishments and forget what a young pretty face is behind them? Good idea."
"I feel I should protest 'pretty'," Roy murmured, but he didn't.
"I'll still be here, with my thumb on the pulse. Do it. Hawkeye will go with you, and that will help you control Grummand.
"I'd like to keep all my staff, the only one I'm worried about is Havoc."
Maes stacked briquettes and then stepped back. "He's about to break up with his girl. Her husband has been transferred back to Central. He really does have the worst taste in women."
"Maybe Gracia can spare a sister." Roy pulled on his gloves and lit the fire with a snap. "If he ever makes Captain."
"Felicity makes great soup!"
**
No one could ruin baked potatoes and salad, although the rolls were a bit burnt. The perfect steak made up for it, and Roy leaned back in his chair, swirling the wine in his glass, at peace with the world. His 'date' for the evening was tucked in her crib and Gracia was making discrete clean up motions, setting up the coffee pot and gathering up plates and silverware. She'd leave Roy and Maes at the table to shoot the bull while she did the dishes, then serve cake and coffee and hopefully Maes would bring out that fine brandy he had. It was only here, where he felt utterly safe, that Roy would relax enough to risk getting tipsy. He knew if he was unable to drive, Gracia would simply steer him into the guest room for the night.
"I don't think I could get a better meal anywhere in Amestris," Roy said, and meant it.
"All that's missing is your wife puttering around with Gracia. Give her someone to talk to while we sit here and pretend we aren't just grunting and getting drunk."
"Maes, you promised you'd lay off the marriage thing until I'm 30."
"I lied," Hughes said cheerfully, then added more seriously, "You are shooting up the ranks, Roy, but a full bull Colonel needs a wife, seriously. You'll have to start hosting parties and things soon. You know Generals aren't made by accomplishments, but by who they know. And that includes the distaff side. Besides," he grinned impishly, "you have to produce a son before Elysia gets too much older than him to marry. Think of our grandkids! ...wait, what am I saying?" He smacked himself in the forehead. "I wouldn't let any boy of yours around my daughter. I know, Gracia and I will have a son and you can have the girl!"
Roy spluttered, caught between insulted and amused, but his comments were interrupted by the telephone trilling. Maes shot it a resentful look but got up from the table to answer. Gracia peeked out of the kitchen anxiously. Roy set his wine glass aside, thinking regretfully of the cake. No one phoned after dinner for any good reason. If Maes was being called in, it would behoove Roy to follow him.
Maes answered with a terse "Hughes." He frowned, listening, and said, "Hope? Sorry, Charity... have you called an ambulance?"
Gracia gasped and grabbed the door jamb. Roy hurried over to her and put a supporting arm around her waist. They both watched as Hughes fired off quick questions, nodding at the replies as if the speaker, presumably Gracia's younger sister Charity, could see him.
"Don't worry, Sweetie, she's a tough old gal. Gracia and I will meet you at the hospital."
"Momma," Gracia said brokenly. Shaking slightly, she pulled away from Roy, murmuring "I must get my purse and hat." She rushed off towards their bedroom.
Hughes hung up and started dialing again. "Gracia's mother collapsed, they think she's had a stroke." He added quietly, just for Roy, "It looks bad. I'll call the garage and have the car sent around, can you let yourself out?"
"Take my car, it's right in front, I'll call a cab, I have more time." Roy flipped him the keys which Hughes deftly tucked into his pocket, hanging up the telephone.
"Thanks, can you get Elysia's carry while I - damn, they won't let us take a baby into Intensive Care - and I wouldn't want to expose her to all those germs, anyway." Maes paused in the act of sliding his wallet - and a few throwing knives - into the appropriate pockets.
Gracia didn't drive. Roy quickly weighed the choices, spending the night at the hospital with Gracia's weeping sisters or... "She's sleeping, right? I'll stay here and babysit until you find someone to take over."
Maes nodded, flashing a quick grin of thanks. Gracia appeared, properly hatted and gloved as an officer's wife should be, in time to hear Roy's offer. She patted him briefly on the arm. "I'm so sorry about your birthday, Roy. Thank you for looking after Elysia for us. She probably won't even wake up, she's been sleeping through the night more often, now. Do try the cake. And the coffee... oh, I left the coffee peculating!" She turned back towards the kitchen but Maes skillfully spun her back around and out the door.
"I'll be back as soon as I can, or I'll send one of the girls over in a cab. Thanks."
Roy shut the door behind them and went to rescue the coffee. And snoop for Maes' brandy, feeling he deserved a tot. He toasted himself, muttering and ironic "Happy Birthday" and settled into Maes' chair to read the paper, resigned to a dull evening.
Exactly 15 minutes later, Elysia began to fuss.
