A/N: Just a little drabble in response to the Parents challenge on Gamma Orionis' Druna Appreciators Society forum. AU in that, since Draco and Luna are married in this oneshot, I decided Scorpius wouldn't exist.
Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter or any of its characters. I do own Valentina Malfoy !
Insight:
It was hard work, being a dad.
Early morning feedings, midnight diaper changes. He couldn't have slept more than four hours in the past two days. He loved her, loved cradling the little bundle of joy he'd helped in the creation of in his arms, there was no doubt about that. Felt invincible whenever he managed to calm her spirited infant cries. If his face wasn't already more lined than it had been before Valentina had been born, though, he was sure he was at least going prematurely grey.
He was new to this and so scared of making a mistake, no matter that he'd had nine months of psychological preparation. It was impossible to feel completely confident in one's abilities when it came to something one loved so very much.
"Am I doing it right, Luna?" Was the question that departed the most frequently from his lips. "Ahh, take her, take her, she's only crying worse!"
To which his wife would laugh, good natured, at him and gaze adoringly into the eyes of their baby with a smile. Luna, unlike him, had such a way with their daughter. She excelled in all areas, especially in those he didn't; getting Valentina to sleep and getting her fed. He knew they were fortunate she had such a finely tuned maternal streak, but at times it could be a little disheartening. What was it he was or was not doing that their little girl found so wrong?
On top of all this he was also working, and then there was worrying about Valentina's future. Even when the newborn was sleeping soundly and thereby giving her parents the opportunity for rest, thinking on this kept him awake at night.
"Love, you have to look on the bright side of things," Luna would tell him when she could sense he was getting a little depressed. "We've a healthy, beautiful family. What more could you want?"
He nodded in agreement, but repressing what he wanted to say, deep inside, pressed close to Luna beneath their thick quilted blanket, comforting himself by stroking her soft hair. Their bedroom was dark except for the faint glow of a street lamp that shone through the slits of the curtains hanging in the window and reflected off of his wife's silvery eyes.
"What?" Through the darkness, she turned to peer at him, when he said nothing, instinctively aware that something was the matter, the thickness of his pent up emotion evident in the air. Wrapping her arms about his bare torso, she gave his cheek a soft kiss."You're not telling me everything."
He sighed and tried to cover it up with a yawn, but doubted that she was fooled. They'd crossed the ten year mark together, though only been married for four years. Of course, as a result, they knew each other much too well.
"It's just..." He trailed off, unsure of how to voice what he was feeling.
"Yes?" She settled for waiting for him, not that there was much else she could do. Usually their roles were reversed and he the one telling her to hurry up, as Luna was a perfectionist and liked to take her time in doing things. It was therefore the least she could do, wait for him. She owed him some patience. "What is it, Draco?"
She was so in earnest, which was neither very common nor very rare since the former Ravenclaw loved to joke around, that he blurted out the first thing that came to mind, able to be completely honest with her. "She loves you more than me. I must not be a very good dad."
Silence for a beat, and then Luna had scrambled up out of bed and turned on the light. "Hey," Draco hissed, one hand raised to shield his tired, unprepared eyes.
"You, sir, don't know what you're talking about." She sat down on the bed to stare seriously at him, though the colourful toe socks she was wearing made it a bit difficult to take her as so. "Valentina loves you, and naturally! You're her father!"
"I can barely feed her with the bottle. I can't do anything right."
"Oh, Draco," she rolled her eyes. "I don't really think she cares about that."
"I just," he grasped at Luna's hand to stabilize himself and took a deep breath before continuing, before his feelings of insufficiency could carry him away. "I know I've only had three months worth of experience, but...I don't know. I want to excel. I don't want her to have the father I had."
Listening carefully and taking her husband's concerns to heart, Luna bobbed her head solemnly. "I hear you, but believe me, she won't, Draco. Do you have any idea how different you are than your father? You're so much more easy going and sweet and easy to love."
"Yeah, sure." Now it was his turn to roll his eyes.
"No, really. You read stories to Valentina. Did Lucius ever read stories to you?"
Draco's smile, though slightly wobbly, was a bit more confident as he responded, "...Only once or twice."
"Do you think he changed any of your diapers?"
"I don't know. No."
She winked at him. "Exactly. Valentina will always love you, whether you're good at swaddling or not."
"Okay," he grinned back, pulling her back under the covers and against him as soon as she'd switched off the light. "I get it. You may have a point."
Luna closed her eyes, head pillowed against his chest, getting pretty comfortable. "I'm sure it won't hurt that you'll be able to help her with potions once she gets to Hogwarts, either."
A chuckle. "Darling, she won't need it. She'll have inherited my skills."
"And my imagination?"
"Um, hopefully."
"Let's try to get some sleep before the next diaper change."
Probably a good idea, but he still had lots to think about. His ponderings were now positive ones, thanks to Luna's insight, but he still didn't think he'd be falling asleep anytime soon.
"Goodnight, Luna."
"Goodnight my love."
A/N: So there it was. Nothing special, but I had the inspiration so I thought why not ! Please review.
