Aren't you such a catch?
What a prize!
Got a body like a battle axe!
-
Ok Go


Among the many things Itachi knows best, the one thing he reminds them frequently is that he's not him. And, he whispers to Okaa-san—just before she breathes her last—he never will be. He is Itachi, boy genius and elite ninja. Pride of the Uchiha and Konohagakure. He is the epitome of perfection, of silence and assassination.

With him there will be no laughter, no brilliant sensei and certainly no medic. Itachi has no need of them and things he has no need of he deems useless.

Father is eyeing him with contemplation as Itachi graduates the ninja academy, genius child. He smiles suddenly, light filling his dark eyes. He gazes at his son with distant satisfaction (notmeantforhim) and says,

"Become a great Uchiha and die with pride."

Why, Itachi thinks musingly, must I die at all?

--

It is the same in the ANBU, with Hatake Kakashi peering at him out of the corner of his eye. He too, is looking at him but searching for someone else at the same time. Itachi sighs softly and adjusts his mask before gazing at his sempai.

"I'm not him." Itachi says bluntly.

Kakashi's mouth quirks into smile not meant for him. His mouth is hot on Itachi's but once again it is not his. Itachi stares at the white haired youth with cold eyes.

"You could try to be." Kakashi remarks casually, before leaving the room. Itachi furrows his brow in deep thought.

Well yes, he could…but what if he'd rather not?

--

When they send him off to a mission his parents always look at him eagerly. Do something extraordinary, they urge silently, lose your eyes, your nose, fingers—or die. Die, like him and make us proud.

He waves his hand in farewell, ignoring their smiles.

He comes back the next day, mission completed successfully. The Hokage and Council are greatly impressed. He is to be awarded soon. The other shinobi countries are beside themselves with jealousy. He is top ranking and to the extreme bitterness of his clan, still alive.

Why, his Mother's face asks as she tucks him into bed, why oh why can't you give us a tragedy?

Itachi is a good boy above all else, and he promises softly and silently—in a way that all Uchiha members' can understand, he will give them a tragedy.

--

Shisui is unfortunate and he revels in it like no other. His fiancée has just been killed in a vicious battle with the Cloud. The funeral was dull yet solemn and no one noticed the secret smile on Shisui's face. No one, besides Itachi that is.

"I can't believe she's really gone…" Shisui whispers dreamily, staring off at the moon. "Someday…I want to die for the clan too." Itachi raises his eyebrows and shrugs. He is a good friend and he listens to this babbling idiot. Has to, the moron follows him around.

"Don't you want to Itachi?"

The next thing he notices is his hands on top of Shisui's head, holding him under with a sort of calmness he hadn't known he had. Remarkably, it was quite easy—throwing Shisui's body into the river. He dusts his hands and sketches a suicide letter with Shisui's handwriting. He is extremely at ease and cannot remember the last time he was so relaxed.

His blood line limit activates suddenly and twinges. Itachi stares at his reflection in the water and cocks an eyebrow. His Sharingan appeared to have evolved.

Mangekyou, it hisses in his brain. I am Mangekyou and I shall make you great.

This was becoming interesting.

--

The thing was, Itachi pondered—wiping Father's blood of his blade—the Uchiha clan had been dead for years. Father twitches slightly and raises himself up to stare at Itachi.

"You're not dead yet?" Itachi sighs. He readies his blade once more.

This isn't what we wanted, Father's expression screams before Itachi's blade buries itself once more. Mother gasps softly for air underneath him.

"Maybe that's why I'm so happy." Itachi murmurs softly, brushing the bangs out of Mother's face. She sighs with unrestrained dejection.

"I love you." She tries.

Itachi's blade swings down once more.

"No. You don't." .

You see, they were so in love with death and him that they forgot to live. And really, the dead were useless to him. Shoulders slightly stiff from the work out, Itachi gets up when the door opens and his little brother enters the picture. Ah…I should say something comforting he thinks.

"You're pathetic." Mangekyou hisses at Sasuke, moving the kid to tears. The blood line limit began to spew some random shit at the kid.

Itachi bravely resisted the urge to yawn.

--

The shark-man is surprisingly strong but Itachi's still genius boy of the elite. It kind of balances out and in the end they have tea in a near by parlor.

"This is going to sound strange…" The shark-man begins. "But do you think you would like to join my organization? We're trying to take over the world and having you would make things easier…"

Itachi sips his tea and purses his lips thoughtfully.

"I don't have to die?"

Shark-man blinks at him.

"Er…no—that would kinda defeat the purpose of using your powers in world domination…"

"Ah."

Itachi sips his tea once more and Mangekyou snarls savagely in his head. His blue companion waits politely for the reply.

"My name is Uchiha Itachi." He sounds the words out carefully, savoring their taste. They're wonderfully light on his tongue and leave him with a sort of breathlessness.

"I am not Uchiha Obito and I never shall be."

The blue man smiles and displays rows of sharp lethal teeth. His nails are painted purple and his cloak is wonderfully strange. Itachi raises a delicate eyebrow.

"Please to meet your acquaintance. I am Hoshigaki Kisame."

Interesting…


Um…comment?