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Heero's Laptop
by Laisia Laurant
DISCLAIMER: I don't own GW. 'Nuff said.
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Duo groaned and buried his head under his pillow, trying to block out the noise. How was a guy supposed to get a decent amount of sleep if that damned Heero "I Am Addicted To My Laptop" Yuy kept typing and clicking through the night? He could barely fight the urge to go over there and unplug the laptop. Or, better yet, just throw the stupid device out the window. But Duo quickly surpressed the urge, valuing his health and life too much to do something that stupid.
Suddenly, Duo realized that Heero was mumbling. Curious, he removed the pillow from his head quietly and listened.
"Red five on the black six... now I can put the three of clubs up on the two of clubs... now all I need is a red nine..."
Duo's eyes grew to the size of saucers. SOLITAIRE?! Heero played SOLITAIRE all these nights? A stupid little CARD game had been keeping him up?!?!
Before Duo had a chance to get up and give Heero a piece of his mind, a gunshot disturbed the relatively calm night. Duo jumped down to lay flat on the floor. "What the hell..." Duo thought as he cautiously stood up, in time to hear Heero's next words.
"Hn," Heero said angrily, staring at the spot where the mouse to his laptop had once been, still pointing the gun. "I'd won 271 GAMES OF SOLITAIRE in a ROW, and YOU made me lose, computer! You deserved what you got, and what you will get now. OMAE O KOROSU!"
With those famous words, Heero opened fire on his laptop, laughing insanely. The laptop instantly blew up, knocking Heero and Duo against the wall.
"Owwwww! What the hell did you do that for, Heero?" Duo complained as he stood up painfully, brushing himself off. But Heero didn't hear him.
"HAhahahahaHAHAHAHAhahaHAHAHA!" Heero yelled, an evil grin spreading over his face. "The evil solitaire has been eliminated! haHAHhAHahaha.... ALL SOLITAIRE MUST DIE!!!!!!!"
Duo carefully walked over to Heero, and put a hand on his shoulder. "Okay, Heero, I think it's time to go see your therapist, what do you say..."
************
Heero lay back in the psychologist's chair, indifferent to the situation. This stupid shrink was going to try to make him, the Perfect Soldier, open up? No way. Duo was crazy to bring him here.
"Hello, Heero!" the psychologist said, smiling. "My name is Dr J and I'm here to help you and to be your friend, all right?"
"Hn," Heero muttered. His friend, his ass. Yeah right.
"Now now now, I can't help you if we don't BOND! We must BOND, Heero! We must become ONE and COMMUNICATE! Now, repeat after me. I am one with Dr J!"
"No," Heero monotoned.
"Come on now Heero, repeat after me! I am one with Dr J!"
"No."
"Please?! Just repeat it! I am one with Dr J!"
"No."
"I AM ONE WITH DR J!"
"No."
"DAMN IT, JUST REPEAT IT ALREADY!"
"No."
"O-kaaay... let's try a different approach. Why are you here?"
"My baka friend made me."
"Do you think you should be here?"
"No."
"What is your problem?"
"Nothing, I have no problems."
"What does your friend think your problem is?"
"I'm not telling you."
"Why not?"
"Because I don't want to."
"Let's go back to your childhood."
"No."
"Were you a happy child?"
"Hn."
"Is that a yes or a no?"
"Hn."
"Will you please answer the question?"
"Hn."
"ARRRRRGH! Will you tell me ANYTHING?!"
"No."
An hour later, Heero walked out of Dr J's office. Duo got up from his chair in the waiting room to greet him.
"Hey, Heero! How'd it go?" Duo asked.
"Ask him," Heero said indifferently, pointing at the psychologist walking out of the office behind him, head in hands.
"Why didn't I stay a scientist?!" Dr J moaned, walking away to get some aspirin and to get some therapy himself.
Heero's Laptop
by Laisia Laurant
DISCLAIMER: I don't own GW. 'Nuff said.
-----------------------
Duo groaned and buried his head under his pillow, trying to block out the noise. How was a guy supposed to get a decent amount of sleep if that damned Heero "I Am Addicted To My Laptop" Yuy kept typing and clicking through the night? He could barely fight the urge to go over there and unplug the laptop. Or, better yet, just throw the stupid device out the window. But Duo quickly surpressed the urge, valuing his health and life too much to do something that stupid.
Suddenly, Duo realized that Heero was mumbling. Curious, he removed the pillow from his head quietly and listened.
"Red five on the black six... now I can put the three of clubs up on the two of clubs... now all I need is a red nine..."
Duo's eyes grew to the size of saucers. SOLITAIRE?! Heero played SOLITAIRE all these nights? A stupid little CARD game had been keeping him up?!?!
Before Duo had a chance to get up and give Heero a piece of his mind, a gunshot disturbed the relatively calm night. Duo jumped down to lay flat on the floor. "What the hell..." Duo thought as he cautiously stood up, in time to hear Heero's next words.
"Hn," Heero said angrily, staring at the spot where the mouse to his laptop had once been, still pointing the gun. "I'd won 271 GAMES OF SOLITAIRE in a ROW, and YOU made me lose, computer! You deserved what you got, and what you will get now. OMAE O KOROSU!"
With those famous words, Heero opened fire on his laptop, laughing insanely. The laptop instantly blew up, knocking Heero and Duo against the wall.
"Owwwww! What the hell did you do that for, Heero?" Duo complained as he stood up painfully, brushing himself off. But Heero didn't hear him.
"HAhahahahaHAHAHAHAhahaHAHAHA!" Heero yelled, an evil grin spreading over his face. "The evil solitaire has been eliminated! haHAHhAHahaha.... ALL SOLITAIRE MUST DIE!!!!!!!"
Duo carefully walked over to Heero, and put a hand on his shoulder. "Okay, Heero, I think it's time to go see your therapist, what do you say..."
************
Heero lay back in the psychologist's chair, indifferent to the situation. This stupid shrink was going to try to make him, the Perfect Soldier, open up? No way. Duo was crazy to bring him here.
"Hello, Heero!" the psychologist said, smiling. "My name is Dr J and I'm here to help you and to be your friend, all right?"
"Hn," Heero muttered. His friend, his ass. Yeah right.
"Now now now, I can't help you if we don't BOND! We must BOND, Heero! We must become ONE and COMMUNICATE! Now, repeat after me. I am one with Dr J!"
"No," Heero monotoned.
"Come on now Heero, repeat after me! I am one with Dr J!"
"No."
"Please?! Just repeat it! I am one with Dr J!"
"No."
"I AM ONE WITH DR J!"
"No."
"DAMN IT, JUST REPEAT IT ALREADY!"
"No."
"O-kaaay... let's try a different approach. Why are you here?"
"My baka friend made me."
"Do you think you should be here?"
"No."
"What is your problem?"
"Nothing, I have no problems."
"What does your friend think your problem is?"
"I'm not telling you."
"Why not?"
"Because I don't want to."
"Let's go back to your childhood."
"No."
"Were you a happy child?"
"Hn."
"Is that a yes or a no?"
"Hn."
"Will you please answer the question?"
"Hn."
"ARRRRRGH! Will you tell me ANYTHING?!"
"No."
An hour later, Heero walked out of Dr J's office. Duo got up from his chair in the waiting room to greet him.
"Hey, Heero! How'd it go?" Duo asked.
"Ask him," Heero said indifferently, pointing at the psychologist walking out of the office behind him, head in hands.
"Why didn't I stay a scientist?!" Dr J moaned, walking away to get some aspirin and to get some therapy himself.
